It was only a matter of time before The Family Chantel busted in again to offer their two cents (which, incidentally, they do NOT want harvested by foreign in-laws). And last night they did just that last night on the 90 Day Fiance Happily Ever AfterTell All, which caused Pedro to walk off stage, leaving Chantel to debate the challenges of marriage with the two people who continuously butt their noses into hers. Jorge and Anfisa faced off with Paola and Russ, of the matching bedazzled shoes. Annie threatened to leave David again if he can’t manage to scrape two Bahts together, while Molly droned on some more about what a loser Luis is. In the end, she’s kind of the only winner here because she dumped her extra baggage.
But not so fast! We also got an entire hour after the Tell All that took us on the death march toward Nicole and Azan’s wedding/possible double-murder by Robbalee. Although I won’t be recapping that last hour here, feel free to comment on all of the insanity below! Ah, 90 Day Fiance Happily Ever After, thanks for the memories. We laughed, we cried, we cringed so hard our couches almost swallowed us up. Now, let’s bring on some new couples! (Don’t forget to tune in next week for Before The 90 Days, which will be bringing us a new batch of crazies fresh outta the catfish pond.)
What do you get when you bring six dysfunctional couples together (minus one Luis), dress them up, then let them openly judge one another’s abysmal choices in life? Yes, it’s time for the 90 Day Fiance Happily Ever After Couples Tell All, part one!Shaun Robinson is back to host/mediate the madness, and we are here to eat our popcorn and watch how long it takes for Jorge to start lying his eyebrows clean off.
Before the cast is assembled on the couch, the drama begins. Paola, who came HARD for Anfisa last year – calling her an ugly mail-order bride – decides to apologize to Anfisa backstage for the sake of appearances. But when she approaches Anfisa Of The Dead Shark Eyes, Paola has no idea what she’s in for – because homegirl just flat out ignores her before brushing right past her without a word! Immediately, Paola starts popping off about what a b*tch Anfisa is and how she’s “not going to beg anyone for forgiveness.” (Um…you might want to rethink this first move, Pao. This is not going to end well for anyone not named Anfisa.) Thus, this disaster of a reunion begins…
We have travelled a long, weary, karate-kicking road. And here we are once again at the end of another journey through the sewer. Tonight 90-Day Fiance Happily Ever After will air part one of its two-part Couples Tell All reunion, complete with accusations, lies, justifications…and maybe even a Family Chantel-inspired fistfight? And we wouldn’t have it any other way!
Shaun Robinson will host this season’s six couples, some of whom have a bitter history with one another from Tell Alls of yesteryear. Anfisa, specifically, will come prepared for battle. Since Jorge (and just about everyone else) threw her under the bus last year for her alleged “prositutorial” work, she’s been gathering her strength and purse-swinging skills to swat back at the haters. Also, it looks like homegirl might have smuggled a shank underneath her coat backstage. #speculation
Since we were gifted with a supersized episode of 90 Day Fiancé: Happily EverAfter for last night’s season finale, there’s a lot of dirty, filthy, stinking laundry to unpack. We haven’t quite seen the last of our six very troubled couples since they’ll be back next week and the week after for the Tell All Reunion, parts one and two. But this is possibly the last time the TLC camera crew will catch them in their natural habitats – from warehouses to flophouses to Moroccan sidewalk scenes where Nicole is about to get locked up abroad. Ah, memories.
Given the length of the episode (with many a flashback) – and my desire to not make you read a Moby Dick length recap – I’ve distilled each couples’ story down to their personal highlights reels. Or, um, lowlights – as the case may be. Here we go!
After last week’s epic throwdown between Pedro, Nicole, and THE ENTIRE FAMILY CHANTEL, we deserve to see the horrific aftermath – including the table of food that Pedro karate kicked. Mother Chantel waving around Nicole’s hair extensions while she decries Pedro and his sister as “very bad people!” is just the beginning of what’s to come. Will Chantel threaten to leave Pedro? Will River attack another innocent light fixture? It’s anybody’s guess, really.
Tonight’s three-hour finale will be the last we see of our couples from 90 Day Fiance: Happily Ever After until the two-part Tell All Reunion begins airing next Sunday. And pssst: Don’t forget that season two of Before The 90 Days is set to premiere Sunday, August 5th! So, we’re all set for Sunday night trainwrecks for the foreseeable future. Phew. (I was panicking there for a second.)
What is there to say about last night’s 90 Day Fiancé Happily Ever After, except thank you TLC, Sharp Entertainment, universe, and The Family Chantel. Two snaps in a circle to all you ALL. This episode was everything I didn’t know I needed in my life – and more.
When we first caught up with our couples at the beginning of the season, who knew we’d end up in fistfights over chicken wings and downgrades from firehouses? Or secret kids and canceled weddings? Okay, maybe we did see it coming. But still! It’s sort of amazing how much lower these people can go even when they’re already so obviously at rock bottom.
Yes, the fight we’ve seen teased in previews for the past two months is finally upon us. It’s Pedro and his sister Nicole versus The Family Chantel. We thought it was already “a little bit more stupider?” NOPE. Because the absolute stupidest is just around the corner.