It’s Wednesday! And, you know what that means: a new Real Housewives of New Jersey episode is on tonight. We pick up where we left off last week. The ladies just arrived at Jackie Goldschneider’s home in the Hamptons.
Teresa Giudice thanked Jackie for inviting her, which is a major milestone considering the rocky (albeit brief) history between these two. And in that same breath, Teresa “thanked” Margaret Josephs for not inviting her to the Mother’s Day brunch she hosted during last week’s episode. Every New Jersey Housewife was there with their mom, meanwhile, Teresa stayed at home, stewing over Margaret excluding her. Well, maybe Teresa should have stuck up for Margaret when Danielle Staub gave Margaret whiplash by pulling her ponytail. Hindsight is 20/20, isn’t it?
As much as
Bethenny Frankel haters don’t want to admit it, Ramona Singer is entertaining. Even when she’s being rude as hell, she manages to make me laugh in between being offended by her antics.
We all know that Ramona is not the best at remembering people’s names, even people she’s “met” many times, you know like fellow Real Housewives and other Bravolebrities. Mercedes Javid, Dolores Catania, and the notorious Kim D have called her out for her poor attitude in recent months. Clearly, Ramona doesn’t watch any Bravo shows she’s not on. And, apparently, she had no idea that Gizelle Bryant is a Real Housewife too. Even now.
Labor Day means a long weekend, which usually translates to some fun times with family and friends. Some of the Vanderpump Rules cast members headed down to Cabo to celebrate Lala Kent’s twenty-ninth birthday. Lala posted a photo in her birthday suit. Stassi Schroeder posed with a sombrero on. Katie Maloney showed off her assets for the camera as well.
Meanwhile, Jax Taylor and Brittany Cartwright went out of the way to make sure that their social media followers knew that they missed their flights to Cabo just in case anyone wondered if they weren’t invited. And I can’t blame them given Jax’s other cast feuds.
Every time I log into Instagram I see photos and videos of Bravolebrities mingling in the Hamptons and I cannot help being intrigued. It just looks like so much fun and I’m dying to know (and see) what else goes down. There should be a Bravo show set in the Hamptons. Oh, wait. There is a Bravo show that takes place in the Hamptons. I just wish there was a good show that was filmed there.
Or at the very least, I wish there was a camera crew to capture what goes down in between seasons. Real Housewives of Orange County star Kelly Dodd recently visited Ramona Singer, which sounds like a good time and a very entertaining spin-off show. Hint hint, Bravo. It was more than that though. Kelly has that visit to thank for her new relationship.
I’m beginning to think that next time, instead of going to The Berkshires, the Real Housewives Of New York all just need to take a trip to rehab. I’m sure Luann de Lesseps knows a place!
Dorinda Medley thought she was making it nice by decorating her house like cheesy haunted house, but the Fish Room is no halloween theme! Those are $15,000 taxidermied sword fish (why? how? so confusing?) and it’s a privilege to pass out drunk before their glassy-eyed stare! Also they are there all. year. round. Come Easter they wear bunny ears, come Christmas twinkly lights, come St. Patty’s day a leprechaun hat, but come Halloween they get to just be their creepy selves. Kinda like the Real Housewives when they enter the Berkshires – all their most idiosyncratic tendencies and behaviors come out in full force and they are their most selves.
Take Luann for instance, throwing a haughty fit after learning she was placed in the Fish Room instead of ‘Hannah’s room’ at the front of the house.
Last night the Real Housewives Of New York headed to the Berkshires and they weren’t there 15 minutes before drama erupted over who has to wake up in the shark room. Ladies – Dorinda Medley made it nice, the least you can do is start out behaving!
Ramona Singer is actually looking forward to the Berkshires this year, because she thinks she’s “good with everyone.” Apparently she’s forgotten that Bethenny Frankel has the memory of an elephant when it comes to other people offending her. And that Luann de Lesseps has an elephantine ego that will not be satisfied with peanuts. Perhaps Ramona’s disaster date gave her a new frame of reference for the people in her lives?
Speaking of dates, Bethenny is headed to Boston to visit the guy she’s dating. I’m confused: at the clambake Bethenny was just considering going on her first post-Dennis date, with a man she’d met before Dennis passed, even though she was engaged to Dennis? Now she’s in a full fledged relationship which has “really heated up” since Dennis died?
Oh, I love Real Housewives Of New York! From Tinsley Mortimer slipping into Southern Sorority mode and using the word “hoebag,” to Dorinda Medley accusing Barbara Kavovit of drinking so much of Luann de Lesseps‘ unspiked Kool-Aid she has Type-2 Diabetes, to Ramona Singer getting lectured on being judgmental from the date from hell and just gulping her wine in response. This show is the pinnacle. Take note, Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills!
We left, and open on a cliff-hanger: will Dorinda and Luann make amends? Aided by Bethenny Frankel, at the Paper Magazine party, Luann saunters over. Clearly she’s expecting Dorinda to bow at her feet, cry, and vow to never utter the dreaded word “Jovani” again.
Last week’s Real Housewives Of New York gave us a Mermaid Moonwalk. This week Ramona Singer terrorized a clambake by stuffing whole lobsters in a plastic grocery bag. This is why Real Housewives Of New York is the best!
“I’m not quite sure if I’m invited or not but I’m inviting myself,” shrugs Ramona, arriving at Barbara Kavovit‘s much-anticipated clambake. She believes wine is the salve that soothes all social wounds. So by bringing two bottles of rosé, PLUS a fancy pie, there’s no way she’ll be turned away. Who knew she’d leave with so many party favors.