When Stassi Schroeder and Beau Clark announced their engagement last week, I noticed two things. First, that ring is gigantic. Way to go, Beau. Second, Kristen Doute was MIA. She didn’t comment on any of the Instagram posts. She didn’t even click “like” until days later. Yes, I was actively checking. And, yes, I’m very ashamed of that. Let’s move on.
After the proposal, their families and Vanderpump Rules cast members gathered at Lisa Vanderpump’s house for a celebration. Kristen was MIA. Again. Is she still banned from Villa Rosa? Well, she probably is, but there’s more to her absence than that. Or at least that’s what Stassi’s mom Dayna Schroeder has hinted at.
Well, our prayers have been answered you guys. Another single one bites the dust in the Vanderpump Rules game of love. With this turn of events, the only people not engaged or in a relationship is myself and Kristen Doute. Anytotalspinster, Stassi Schroeder has seen her fair share of dating woes. When viewers first met Stassi, she was trying to tame bad boy Jax Taylor. At the time, Jax wasn’t marriage material. He wound up cheating on Stassi and getting a random Vegas girl pregnant. Good thing he changed for the better, amirite?
Stassi then turned her attention towards Frank the Bartender. Smarmy Frank found himself bribing Stassi for a whopping $900, or he would release a very… revealing video of the former SURver. Thankfully Lisa Vanderpump paid him to go away. Then there was probably the biggest
twat mistake Stassi made, Patrick Meagher. This guy was a real winner, he wore his misogynist comments better than he wore his hair. After a painful relationship with multiple gaslighting sessions, Stassi finally saw the error of her ways. Patrick spoke down to Lisa on camera, and he disappeared shortly thereafter. Enter Beau Clark. Sweet, hipster Beau seemed to be the perfect man for Stassi. Her friends accept him, her mom REALLY likes him, and she fell madly in love. Now Stassi and Beau are joining the rest of the crew and officially adulting. Ready or not, another wedding is coming.
Vanderpump Rules is a gold mine for Bravo. No other show (besides the Housewives) has the power and popularity on the network. We love watching how messy people like Jax Taylor and DJ James Kennedy act season after season. Also, the cast has genuine relationships with each other too, so it works. It’s a magical setup that most people assumed would be left on its own and not turned into a franchise.
However, all of that could soon change. When Lisa Vanderpump opened her Vegas cocktail garden, rumors began swirling about a possible spin-off show. The proposed idea would follow a new crop of employees and a new wave of dramatic, young people. Lisa does have more time on her hands these days, so anything is possible. However, Andy Cohen might feel differently about the idea based on his recent comments.
A funny thing happened on the way to the altar. Tom Schwartz and Katie Maloney were hitched in 2016. Their journey towards marriage was bumpy along the way, but the couple eventually worked through relationship issues. The wedding and reception were heavily featured on several episodes of Vanderpump Rules. In a magical wilderness setting, their true love was pledged as Lisa Vanderpump officiated the ceremony. Since that enchanting day, Tom and Katie have enjoyed the benefits of holy matrimony. Or have they?
Apparently the Bubbas forgot about a crucial part of getting married. The marriage license. Whoopsie! Lance Bass recently
followed orders outed the fact that Tom and Katie might not legally be Mr. and Mrs. Schwartzy. Now scandal is afoot as rumors emerge the happy couple is not officially married. Never fear, Katie and Tom have a solution! Come now, did you really think Brittany Cartwright would have all the matrimonial glory next season?
Minus the big events, like Jax Taylor and Brittany Cartwright’s wedding in Kentucky, the Vanderpump Rules Season 8 details have remained under wraps. Well, minus the gossip that Lance Bass leaked the (alleged) status of Katie Maloney and Tom Schwartz’s marriage.
Lance isn’t the only one leaking the Pump Rules news though. Or at least that is what it seems like. Did Lala Kent spill the beans about a new addition to the show? That’s up for interpretation at this point, but let’s get into the evidence.
There seems to be a lot of legal drama around the Los Angeles Bravolebrities these days. You’ve got the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills ladies and their myriad of issues. Then you’ve got the Vanderpump Rules crew, whose legal woes are not quite at the same level of RHOBH
grifters stars. But just give it some time. Lala Kent and Randall Emmett are bound to have something up their sleeves. Just ask fofty.
Still, there are some recent issues. Jax Taylor allegedly owed a large amount in back taxes. Then Lisa Vanderpump’s bestie, Lance Bass, dropped the bomb that Tom Schwartz and Katie Maloney are not legally married because they didn’t send in the right materials. I’m sure this caused Tequila Katie to come out of the shadows and rage text Lance all hours of the night to drop it and apologize. Unfortunately, the apology they received might not be what they had hoped for.
Wedding bells are ringing, y’all. It seems like most of the Vanderpump Rules cast has found a significant other. Joining the
future divorce marriage club will be Lala Kent and HER MAN, Randall Emmett. Together for several years now, Lala and Rand have endured trying times in their relationship, traveling the peaks and valleys of love. They were engaged to be wed in 2018 and Lala is already planning the festivities. And we all know how much Bravo loves a tragedy sophisticated marriage ceremony.
Fans have certainly seen their share of wedding spin-off shows. NeNe Leakes had one. Kandi Burruss also shared her journey to the altar. Kim Zolciak got an entire show after her bride-to-be antics were featured. Now there is speculation that Randall and Lala have something going on behind the scenes. Thanks to social media and
desperation the desire to tease, viewers are wondering if Lala and Randall are filming a little spinoff of their own.
There isn’t much that can shock viewers of Vanderpump Rules. We’ve become jaded by infidelity, heavy partying, and glassy-eyed filming. Fans have watched relationships fail and flourish again. We have also seen some weddings.
We were treated to the charming, wooded ceremony between Tom Schwartz and
his captor Katie Maloney. Pump Rules gave us a Northern California spectacle of forest whimsy. As Tom Sandoval cried into a dog, Katie and Tom 2 traded vows and marriage rings. Since then, the two have shared endless good times and recently purchased a house. We must mention the United States’ own version of the royal wedding. Jax Taylor and Brittany Cartwright held court in Kentucky, as they promised to be in each other’s lives for the next two years forever. Katie served as Brittany’s Matron of Honor, a title given to the bride’s married friend in a wedding party. But hang on folks! We are now finding out Katie might not be a Matron after all. Or a wife.