Aaaahhh… Real Housewives of New Jersey – just when I thought this season would never end and we'd be trapped in a labyrinth with Melissa Gorga popping up around random corners to sing at us and Teresa Giudice chasing us down calling us "prostitution whore!" comes word that the reunion for the eternal fourth season has filmed.
So there is light at the end of the tunnel. I won't be recapping RHONJ until the end of eternity. To quote a certain NJ lady, "Thank you Jesus!"
Yes, that's right this weekend the RHONJ reunion filmed to insane reviews. Just ask anyone who was there. Taking to twitter the cast reacted to what was surely a PTS inducing nightmare of screaming, accusations, hysteria, and one very afraid and powerless Andy Cohen shrieking randomly for people to shut-up. Oh, Andy… why you so useless?
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Jacqueline Laurita immediately hopped on twitter to confirm that A) she actually attended this year and B) she required Xanax to recover.
"Yesterday was 10 hours of insanity," Jacqueline added. And just how insane was it? "Let's just say that my emotions got so high that staff on set gave me a Xanax toward the end and it didn't even work for me."
It seemed everyone had similar reactions. Oh – I can just see the previews now: The Most Shocking Reunion Ever. I can only imagine how many episodes this will be stretched out over! Speaking of which: "7 words for the #RHONJ reunion yesterday with @BravoAndy…. IT'S LIKE NOTHING YOU'VE EVER SEEN BEFORE," Melissa tweeted.
Kathy Wakile summed it up thusly, "I can't believe @richardwakile is so quiet today after yesterday's #RHONJ Reunion! #StrangePhenomenon #ShellShocked @BravoAndy"
Even Andy described the reunion as completely out of control!
Which brings us to Teresa. Oh, Teresa… you know she spent every second yelling, screaming, and defending herself. "I have no voice today. :)," she responded to Andy via twitter.
So what made the reunion so vitriolic and crazy? Other than the obvious that none of the castmembers can stand each other? Apparently this day was all about Caroline vs. Teresa round a zillion.
“This is a super important day for both ladies,” a former cast member
Danielle shares with The Huffington Post. “They haven’t seen or spoken with each other in over a year. The pressure is on as the reunion shows are not only the highest-rated but they're also an audition to decide who is invited back for next season."
"Pay careful attention to where the producers sit each of the ladies on the couch. The ladies that sit closest to Andy are the ones producers think are the most important and want to invite back. If you are seated at the other end of the sofa, you better make sure you perform, or it could be your last show,” the former Housewife adds. Interesting tidbit – not sure I believe it.
Apparently the location of the reunion is kept a secret from the Housewives to prevent any unwelcome visitors. “We are picked up by cars early in the morning and taken to the venue to do hair and makeup," the former Housewife explains.
"Then producers want us to start taping at 11 a.m. until, well, as long as it takes! It will for sure be all day,” a current RHONJ lady revealed. “We have all been given the last three unaired episodes to watch and it is brutal. This is going to be a blood bath. And let's not forget that free booze is available all day.”
Well… um… I can't wait. I guess.
Moving on, Teresa stepped out of the house sans makeup! The woman who wore leopard print to the delivery room was spotted working out with Milania looking like, well, a person who is working out!
The photo is below! My guess – Teresa is starting a make-up line and the before and after will serve as a testament to how well the product works. I just want to know what is going on with those socks straight out of 1992!
Finally, tonight is an all new episode of RHONJ. And oh boy, it's a doozy. Dina Manzo will finally return as she cozies up to Teresa at the Fabellini launch. Teresa and Dina discuss the massive fight Teresa and Caroline had in Napa and Dina will remind her friend that sometimes blood isn't thicker than water, well metaphorically of course.
Real Housewives of New Jersey returns tonight at 10/9c on Bravo. Reality Tea will be live-tweeting all the shenanigans. And thankfully wine is thicker than water too and I'll be indulging. Please join us. You know you want to.
[Photo Credit: Stars Media]
TELL US – HOW DOES TERESA LOOK WITH NO MAKE UP? WHAT DO YOU THINK WILL HAPPEN AT THE REUNION? WHO WILL STORM OUT? DOES THE SEATING CHART REALLY DETERMINE WHO IS GUARANTEED TO RETURN NEXT SEASON?
Teresa without her make up, again! And Milania in pjs and no shoes! Oh girls… [Credit: Stars Media]
Albie and Christopher stealing Andy's cue cards at the reunion! [Photo Credit: Caroline Manzo’s Twitter]