During the first hour of the Teen Mom 3 premiere, Briana DeJesus took legal action against Devoin Austin, Mackenzie Douthit and Josh McKee struggled with mature communication, Katie Yeager and Joey Maes argued non-stop, and Matt McCann's return from rehab stressed out Alex Sekella.
Believe it or not hour number two ends with one of these awe-inspiring couples becoming engaged to be married. All together now – seriously?!?
Mackenzie talks to a friend about her relationship woes. She briefly wonders if Josh resents her for pursuing cheer after
she demanded he quit rodeo he put bull riding on hold. Crazy talk! Mackenzie comes to the conclusion that she and Josh fight too much because they don't spend enough time together. She plans to ask him to move in with her.
Cayla wisely questions Mackenzie's thought process. She reasons, "I know moving in is risky, but it's got to be better than living apart."
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Briana talks to a friend about the Twitter harassment and the restraining order against Nova's dad. Briana admits that she'd be willing to drop the court case if Devoin finds his manners (at the least) and learns how to be a good father (at the most). Briana doesn't expect either to happen.
Next Alex learns that she's 252 assignments behind in school. She tries to talk to Matt about her workload; he laughs at her. Then, Matt decides that merely holding his daughter is too strenuous of a task, and he asks Alex to help him. Kudos to her for not kicking him in the face. Alex says about school, "Taking care of Arabella, working… I never have time," to which Matt says, "Yeah."
Mackenzie moves forward with her "stop the fighting" plan and asks Josh to move in with her. "Doesn't matter to me," reads Josh's subtitles. "I'm game with whatever." Such a charmer, that one!
While Alex tackles those 252 assignments and watches Arabella, Matt and his friend Rudy play basketball, which seems fair. Rudy asks, "They got you on lock, bro? Got any chores you gotta do?" to which Matt says, "Yeah, I gotta clean up after myself, dude." #poorbaby After roughly thirteen more dudes, yos, and yeahs, Matt admits he does not plan on staying with Alex long-term.
Devoin makes an appearance to
earn an MTV paycheck whine about his parenting experience thus far. He shares, his feelings were hurt when Briana chose not to name his as Nova's father, though he leaves out the part where he cyber bullied her as a result. Devoin has the audacity to add that Briana needs to work on her co-parenting skills.
Meanwhile Alex accuses Matt of getting high while playing basketball. He denies using drugs and lets Alex's mom check his eyes with a flashlight. She thinks his eyes look fine but reminds him that she will "whip out a piss test" if she ever has doubts. An unconvinced Alex calls Matt stupid.
Mackenzie asks her mom if Josh can move into their house. Obviously doing this before she invited him to move in would have made too much sense. Mom does not approve; nevertheless, she promises to think about it. Meanwhile, Josh is out with a friend, listing all the reasons why he never wants to live with Mackenzie. These two crack me up!
Next Briana gets a text message from Devoin, which reads, "I really want to make this work between me and you and Nova. We need to be a family. We need to do this together." Coincidence? Or is Briana's earlier friend a snitch? Briana doesn't know what to think. "Look at the asshole you're dealing with," says Brittany. "I'd be confused too." Briana considers dropping the court case but doesn't plan to let Devoin off the hook where Nova is concerned.
Joey decides to ask Katie to marry him. Ah yes, all is right in their world again, and this makes perfect sense to him. Will Katie agree? "She'll say yes," says Joey. "Cause I'm sexy and we make beautiful babies." Of course!
Meanwhile Alex freaks out when Matt leaves the house with Rudy. Mom says, "You're not supposed to watch over him to the point you make him want to run," to which Alex says, "Right now, I just want to punch him." Matt comes home an hour later. Alex does not punch him, but she does yell, a lot. Alex's younger sister, Arielle, chastises Alex. "Instead of you yelling at him, maybe you should listen to him," she suggests. "You get annoyed by the stupidest things." I don't care for Matt, but Arielle speaks the truth. Can she replace Dr. Drew?
Briana goes to court, wearing a t-shirt and sweatpants, and drops the court case against Devoin. Mom supports her decision but demands that Briana speak her mind and never allow Devoin to abuse/harass/bully her again.
Next Mackenzie's parents give the okay for Josh to move into their house. Mackenzie's all smiles until Josh declines the offer. No thanks is definitely not what Mackenzie expected to hear. There's trouble at the rodeo. Again.
Joey and Katie go out to dinner – awkward conversation ensues, followed by a lackluster marriage proposal. Katie says yes, adding, "You're so
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