Keeping up with the Kardashians

Kourtney Kardashian and Scott Disick LAX

Imagine…someone in Canada thinks Keeping up with the Kardashians is too crude. Are we watching the same show? Obviously, I'm being sarcastic, although I am not at all surprised by the dirty mouths on Khloe, Kourtney, and Kim, nor do their thong pulling, underwear sniffing, breast leaking antics shock me in the least. How sad is that?

It all started with a "knock knock" joke courtesy of Lord Scott Disick on Keeping up with the Kardashians that aired on October 23 in the middle of the afternoon. He and Kourtney spent part of the episode using donuts and carrots to simulate a certain sex act.  Keepin' it klassy, those two! I guess I should give you the warning that there may some offensive jokes and/or language after the jump…you know, the warning that the Canadian version of E! forgot to issue before the episode in question!


brody jenner

It's your update on all things Kardashian–you're over the moon, I'm sure! I promise to bypass any news about Kim and the tiny rapper, and only focus on some of the more tolerable gossip…like Lamar Odom professing that Khloe Kardashian will always be his wife, no matter what! I may even have some sad rumors for you too. Could the eye candy that is Brody Jenner (brother Brandon's just as hot!) be peacing out on Keeping up with the Kardashians? Honestly, he didn't seem overly happy to spend time with Kris Jenner just to get to see father Bruce. And finally, because, hey, everybody's doing it!–Kendall and Kylie Jenner are dishing on their new young adult novel.  Happy weekend, y'all!

Speaking to Us Weekly, Lamar reveals he isn't ready to give up on his marriage.  He says, "I love my wife. She'll always be my wife, no matter what. Who knows? We don't know exactly if [the divorce is going through]. Only time will tell. I hope not. But even if we were divorced, she would always be my wife," sharing, "Those were some of the best years of my life. Being married and being married to a woman I decided to marry was, besides having children, the most important thing in my life." 



This week's reality TV viewer numbers were all over the place. On Sunday, just over four million viewers watched Kenya's charity ball for Saving our Daughters on Real Housewives of Atlanta. That is a considerable drop from last week's record breaking 4.638 million but still above this season's average. 

The commitment ceremony nonsense on Sister Wives is not holding viewers' attention.  Only 1.825 million bothered to watch this week – down almost 600K since the premiere. Keeping Up with the Kardashians scored big this week with 2.574 million tuning in to see Kanye propose to Kimmy. Sweet. Now let's send these two to the moon. Forever.

On Monday,  1.952 million viewers tuned in for the season three premiere of Basketball Wives L.A. Meanwhile, both Real Housewives of Beverly Hills (1.711) and Vanderpump Rules (1.780) lost a lot of viewers this week – but Vanderpump Rules came out on top again.

On Tuesday, part one of the Shahs of Sunset reunion garnered 1.151 million, which is a drop from last week. The trainwreck that is Dance Moms these days logged just over two million viewers this week. Forever ruling the night is Teen Mom 2 – and 2.403 million heads exploded after Jenelle and Nathan decided that they were in a good place and want to make a baby.


kim kardashian gray

Kim Kardashian and her sisters will slap their names on anything and everything, won't they? From make-up to accessories to their Sears Kardashian Kollection, Kim, Khloe, and Kourtney have built quite an empire above and beyond their often annoying and crude reality television personalities (guilty, I watch the reruns!), and not surprisingly, they are going to keep adding to it.

Now, the sisters are announcing the launch of a kids' kollection launching at Babies 'R Us that Kim hinted about not too long ago when a fan asked her if she'd ever put North West in clothes from Target (answer: when hell freezes over). I guess you need to keep making beaucoups of money if you, oh, I don't know, decide to hire a full-time tailor just for you! Oh Kim. She's so down to earth!

What's that you say? The sisters are designing baby clothes? Kim is bankrolling a personal seamstress? Which to discuss first…


Kim Kardashian and her sisters, Kourtney and Khloe Kardashian leave their hotel and head to their store Dash in New York City

Update – it sounds like Khloe's coat is fake fur, according to her Twitter. "F*ck Yo Fur!!! Fake fur all day people!!"

Kim, Kourtney and Khloe Kardashian are in NYC filming what feels like the nine billionth season of Keeping up with the Kardashians.  Today the sisters stepped out to do some taping with their crew, so naturally they headed over to one of their DASH stores.  Wearing fur and leather.  But not just any ole fur coats. 

Khloe went one step further, wanting to be sure she beat any possible paint throwers from PETA to the punch.  Khloe turned around, showing that the back of her fur coat was covered in graffiti that says "Fxck Yo Fur" in red paint. Wonder if this is from the Kanye West collection? Sad, because I liked the coat coming, just not going.

Kourtney was also decked out in fur, too, but her coat wasn't mutilated (just a little ugly).  And Kim.  Well, Kim wore a super long black leather dress thing of some sort that looked like she'd trip if she tried to walk in it.  And is it just me or is she bronzed/tanned to high heaven again? 


Topshop Unique: Front Row - London Fashion Week AW14

Well, well… what have we here! A Kardashian infiltration. 

Kendall Jenner, who truly is gorgeous, recently walked in the Marc Jacobs show at NY Fashion week and the skedaddled over to London where she sat front row alongside the impenetrable Anna Wintour and Kate Moss at the Topshop Unique show. The two did not appear to be interacting much (if at all), but Kendall recently appeared in an Instagram style-Vogue photoshoot. 

In it Kendall takes selfies while wearing a variety of fashion week looks. While it's a far-cry from landing a cover of Vogue (which sister Kim Kardashian is rumored to be in the process of doing), I think the Keeping Up With The Kardashian star looks great.


Generation NXT Charity Benefit

Kim Kardashian is charitable, y'all!  She's so like charitable and stuff that she was HONORED for it last night in NYC by Generation NXT.  And made sure the Keeping up with the Kardashians film crew got it on tape. 

Kim, Khloe and Kourtney didn't care that it was freezing out in NYC last night as they all stepped out in pretty thin suits and skirts to attend the charity event. They were even spotted holding each other up on the icy sidewalks in their high heels.  Nobody fell, for the record.  Later on Kim met up with baby daddy Kanye West, who did dress for the weather in his cashmere coat.  We don't have that pic just yet, but we're working on it.


bruce jenner blue hair

Here's some news that's totally going to shock you…the Kardashians are pillars of the truth. Shocking, I know. I should have told you to sit down for that!  Here's something else: it seems that Kris Jenner and her pals over at TMZ have had somewhat of a falling out recently. Why do I say this? The site, which once was all about some Kartrashian promotion and positive spin doesn't seem to be cow-towing to ol' Kris.

Oh, and guess what? The family isn't going away any time soon. Kim Kardashian has promised up and down that this will be the final season of Keeping up with the Kardashians. The show was renewed by E! for three seasons back in 2012 for over $40 million. However, it seems that they just don't know how to live their lives off the small screen because they have plans to return. Again. But this time without Bruce Jenner. Lucky us.


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