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Keeping up with the Kardashians

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Here comes the bride, all dressed in white.  Oh, wait.  Sorry Kris Jenner!  It seems that high hopes for a Kourtney Kardashian and Scott Disick wedding extravaganza won't be in the cards for a Keeping Up With the Kardashians season finale.  What?

According to the rumor mill, Kourtney is still refusing to make things official with the father of her two children.  Seeing as both Kim and Khloe Kardashian offered up million dollar nuptials in the name of ratings, one would think that Kourtney would be on board with using her walk down the aisle to attract viewers.  She's not.  It looks like Kris may need to find a quick beau for younger daughters Kylie and Kendall if Kourtney isn't willing to use her relationship to spearhead the finale!  Gah!

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lisaEveryday Real Housewives of Beverly Hills' star Lisa Vanderpump gives me a reason to love her even more.  I'll be honest, I wasn't on board with Lisa in earlier seasons.  It's not that I didn't like her, it's just that I was indifferent towards her.  Oh, how times have changed!

This season's Lisa is every bit as stylish and classy as she's been the past two seasons, but it's awesome to see her forming opinions and standing up for her friends.  Yes, she's brash and brutally honest, but she's also (in my opinion) totally genuine and grounded.  Not to mention, I love her wardrobe, her precious son-in-law, and the romance that is still totally alive between her and Ken Todd.  You just can't fake that kind of relationship.  She's real…and she could buy and sell me a thousand times over!

Not only has Lisa gained a spin-off (can't wait!) due to her RHOBH popularity, but she's also getting outside deals.  First up?  She's judging the Miss Universe pageant alongside Kourtney Kardashian's beau Scott Disick.  Did I mention that she's nothing if not honest?

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My good gracious!  Another Kardashian post so close to Christmas?  I must be on the naughty list this year.  I'll be honest, I'd rather receive a lump of coal than to have to pontificate on this fake family during the holidays.  I do it for you, dear readers.  You mean more to me than my disdain for this crowd.  Isn't that what Christmas is all about?  You're welcome.  ;)

In today's news, Kris Jenner is trying to maintain her now faux marriage to husband Bruce despite a ridiculous amount of divorce rumors circulating in the media.  Also, sources are claiming that Nick Cannon was also a victim of Kim Kardashian's infamous sex tape.  I can't wait to hear the chain of information that led him to this conclusion! 

Finally, Bruce is opening up to the media about his ties to Newtown, Connecticut and the Sandy Hook murders.  While typing that makes me want to vomit (let this community grieve without reality television intervention!), it's what he's talking about now.  I used to like you, Bruce, but I've lost all respect if you're trying to maintain relevancy in light of this horrific event.  Sidebar, and this has nothing to do with this blog, but from here on out (sorry for the soapbox) will we please refer to the Sandy Hook shootings as a mass murder and the man that took those innocent lives (I won't give his name more credence here) as a murderer?  I read a compelling article the other day that noted in school shootings the public regresses to words like "shooter" and "victims" instead of using "murderer" and "slain" or "dead" in these types of tragedies.  If someone killed a gas station attendant, we'd call it a murder, why don't we say that now?  Off my soapbox and onto the Kardashian kraziness.  I taught first grade for several years, so I am a tad raw at the moment…as no doubt you are. 

Moving along (so, so sorry for the rant!), Kris is determined to make sure that her failing marriage doesn't drown the empire she's created around her children (notice I don't say the empire created FOR her children).  What won't this woman do?

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Kardashian-kristmas-kard

It's that all-important special time again – time for the Keeping Up With The Kardashians Kristmas Kard! Behold: it's splendiferous, it's Kanye-less, and Kourtney looks thinner than Kim although she had a baby like last week.

I think Kris Jenner may be there? That very young and sassy woman sitting next to Kendall with the Pat Benetar hair cut is confusing me…

So congrats Photoshop you've worked your miracles again. 

[Photo Credit: E! Online/Nick Saglimbeni/kimkardashian.celebuzz.com]

TELL US – THOUGHTS ON THIS YEAR'S KRISTMAS KARD? WHERE'S KANYE?

 

Is Kim Kardashian losing some of her male fanbase?

In the 2011 edition of AskMen's "most desirable" poll, Kim was at the top of the heap, ranking in at #8.  This year, however, is a whole different story.  Kim nearly fell off the poll entirely, landing in at #98 (out of 99)! 

The site polls over 2.4 million readers, so this isn't some tiny overview of males who just happen to be over Kim.  AskMen's editor James Bassil said in the press release  "Kim Kardashian is petering off and basically dropping off the list at this point even as she's become more visible."

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You know what they say, where there's smoke, there's usually fire…and when the same Kardashian rumors keep circulating again and again, there has to be some truth to them, right?  Once again there are rumblings of a fed up Bruce Jenner ready to divorce his pimp wife Kris Jenner.    I mean if Bruce has any lick of sense about him, he can't be happy in his marriage–especially if it's anything like we see portrayed on Keeping Up With the Kardashians

Of course, it has been kind of quiet on the Kardashian front of late, so the revival of marital discord gossip could be Kris' attempt at getting her name back in the media.  We all know she's really good at that!  These new rumors have Bruce moving daughters Kendall and Kylie out of the family home before Kris can railroad their remaining teenage years into reality gold.  They are daughters, not brands!

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The Kardashians rarely (ok, never) keep anything private. And joining in on the family's favorite extracurricular activity of making anything a publicity stunt, Rob Kardashian has taken to Twitter to discuss his relationship with ex-girlfriend Rita Ora

Among the scathing allegations the Keeping Up With The Kardashian star and wannabe sock mogul makes is accusing Rita of cheating on him with more than 20 guys! Uhhh… this is really something for twitter? Anyhoodle, let's take a look at Rob's public whining. 

Getting around the 140 characters rule, Rob posted a series of tweets beginning with: “When a woman cheats on you with one man I can live with that. People make mistakes, trust me. I have forgiven numerous times…”  

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I don't mean to be redundant, but I know I've said this before…bless Kim Kardashian's heart.  Seriously, bless it.  Not only does the mere mention of her name make people in the states automatically get a rash, now the Middle East is creeped out by her as well.  That's got to be a tough cross to bear, and I don't even care for her.  Yet I feel badly…must be the holidays.

As you all know, Kim has been touring Kuwait and Bahrain touting Millions of Milkshakes.  I'm sure President Obama is super excited about the amount of diplomacy that's happening with that situation!  Anyhoo, I'm sure poor Kim was thrilled at the opportunity to promote the dairy treats on the other side of the world while wearing the finest couture from the Kardashian Kollection and the tiny rapper's new shoe line.  Little did she know she'd be welcomed with protests and discord.  Of course, we probably all figured she would given her recent controversial (and likely clueless on Kim's part) tweets, but she was totally sidelined by her less than stellar welcome.  Damn you, Twitter!

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