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Adrienne Maloof

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Andy Cohen doesn't like to be deprived of quality catfighting at his Real Housewives reunions.  I mean, how else can he stretch them out over 2-3 episodes!

He has made it clear that he's ticked at Adrienne Maloof for being too chicken to face the ladies for the season 3 Real Housewives of Beverly Hills rehashing. 

He told E!:

“She stiffed me. I was not pleased … Also I feel it was bad for her because, why let six women have the last word on an entire season? I think she should have been there to speak her mind, and she may be surprised with some of the directions the conversations took.”

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adrienne-maloof-leopard-print

Oh it is a sad, sad time for reality television! Everyone's favorite tinsel-headed, Palms hawking, sleazy chef-lovin, Lisa Vanderpump bashing, catified rubber-faced maven is leaving Real Housewives of Beverly Hills!

That's right, last week Adrienne Maloof announced she would not return to the show that made her tacky a nation-wide horror and for that we mourn. Or snark. And you know what that means: it's time for a Housewives Retrospective! 

And without further ado, we say good-bye to out first lady of terrible facelifts, Adrienne!

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brandi-adrienne-chelsea

Oh dear! We're on Real Housewives War, Vol 2 million. Last week comedian Chelsea Handler had a rather lackluster and brutal appearance on Watch What Happens Live. She openly told Andy Cohen that his brainchild, The Real Housewives franchise, was awful. 

"I think that franchise is kind of a terrible thing," Chelsea remarked to Andy. "Women shouldn't be making money off of the fact that they have fake books, fake vaginas, fake whatever. I actually don't support that."

When Andy reminded her that she'd had some Housewives as guests, Chelsea quickly clarified she had "one," Bethenny Frankel. "Not even Brandi Glanville," Chelsea pointed out. 

"I love the Housewives," Chelsea quipped sarcastically. Ironically for someone complaining about how fake the Housewives are, Chelsea dear has had a whole lotta botox. Dang girl – surprised you can move that mouth slapped into the middle of a too-tight shiny face. 

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rhobh-recap

Last night on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills the ladies left Paris. They returned to the BH where the antics picked up where they left off and we learned Faye Resnick hadn't fallen off the face of the earth in their stead but instead was just waiting frozen faced and clammy in the cryogenic chamber for their return.

Splits Richards opened her very own boutique cause she's bored all day and if Kathy Hilton did it why can't she? And oh yeah – Taylor Armstrong got a rude awakening! Sweet justice. 

Things begin with Splits waltzing onto the Ledo Deck in a full-on circus tent refashioned into a skirt. Apparently said skirt, a cacophony of patterns and colors, is available for $900 at her store. Oh, Kyle… at least you never lose hope! There's that right? I was a wee bit disappointed she didn't hop onto the mast for a full-flying Titanic rendition. 

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The US Weekly AMA After Party at Avalon

Well, well.. who didn't see this one coming! Not five minutes after she announced her departure from Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, where she was hoping producers would jump on the chance to air the F-List version of Demi & Ashton, Adrienne Maloof and Sean Stewart have called it quits! 

Adrienne was reportedly using the relationship as leverage to return for season 4, but producers were disinterested in the idea. That must of been the nail in the coffin for this publicity stunt relationship! 

"They've decided to distance themselves and become friends. Nothing bad happened," an Adrienne source tells Us Weekly. "They're still going to hang out as friends, they enjoy each other's company."

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Rod Stewart and Penny Lancaster leaving The Dorchester Hotel

It's probably no coincidence that the week Adrienne Maloof was fired from Real Housewives of Beverly HIlls, Penny Lancaster (wife of Rod Stewart and rumored new cast member) backed out on her opportunity to be a Housewife. After all, Adrienne is dating her step-son Sean Stewart!

Rod shared yesterday that his wife isn't interested in reality TV. "She was asked but she turned it down," Rod insists. 

"She doesn't want to do that sort of thing," he told TMZ. "She's just happy being a mom."

Bravo is reportedly having difficulty finding high society ladies wiling to sully their reputation by appearing on the show. In order to bolster the cast to truly represent the BH caliber, they are cleaning house. Adrienne and Camille Grammer are not returning for season 4. Rumors are also swirling that Taylor Armstrong and Kim Richards will be MIA next season. 

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adrienne-maloof-lisa-vanderpump

I want y'all to think back to a simpler time…a time when neighbors were friends, and they washed Cornish game hens in dish washing soap and had dinner parties together.  A time before the skies grew dark, and one friend with blue hair feathers got mad at another satin cloaked friend for not having her satin cloaked daughter's bachelorette party at feather-mane's casino.  I miss those days.  NOT!  While I generally don't enjoy conflict (it makes me super uncomfortable), there is something about the Lisa Vanderpump/Adrienne Maloof feud that is oh, so entertaining.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills stars used to be pals, but now there's an unfair fight brewing in the tabloids.  A now fired Adrienne is taking every opportunity to badmouth her former friend, and she should have learned long ago that talking smack about Lisa never ends well for the smack talker.  Lisa is smart enough not to start any drama, but when it comes her way, she silences it with some biting and witty remarks that make said smack talker look like an idiot.  And let's be honest, shall we?  Adrienne is already struggling with her image, and her new plan of spewing hate on Lisa's restaurant Villa Blanca is quickly backfiring. 

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The Weinstein Company's 2013 Golden Globe Awards Party

Someone please help Adrienne Maloof out. She seriously needs it. And I don't just mean in the wardrobe/spray tan department. Adrienne confirmed she is quitting/got fired from Real Housewives of Beverly HIlls, but that doesn't mean she's leaving the show well enough alone!

Apparently Adrienne has continued her vengeance proximity to Lisa Vanderpump by deciding to open a new restaurant on mere streets away from Lisa's Villa Blanca. Is she hiring Bernie to fry up some scandalous accusations? 

Adrienne has also been butchering Lisa's business; declaring her new venture a "10" while dismissing Lisa's well-established restaurant as "a disaster" and rating it a "2." Adrienne is even turning it into a competition with Lisa according to TMZ, telling associates she is going to "kick her ass!" 

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