Lisa Vanderpump

yolanda-bella-iv

Yolanda Foster and her endless “journey” are infesting this season’s Real Housewives of Beverly Hills like lice in a kindergarten class. Everyone’s itchy. But Patient Zero is not happy (or rather claims she’s not happy) about her children getting involved in her StoryLyme. Because she’s only interested in exploiting them through sick-kid selfies, photoshopped by Yo herself!  Yolanda took her her blog this week to go on…and on…and on about the many splendored feelings she has about her health, her children’s health, her castmate’s opinions about her and her children’s health. You know, the usual! 

Here are the highlights: 1) Yolanda bizarrely blames Lisa Vanderpump for exploiting Bella and Anwar Hadid’s Totally Legitimate Illnesses! 2) Erika Girardi is a good friend because she lies. Confused? Well, read on!

After thanking Bravo viewers – AGAIN – for partaking in this “journey” with her <gag>, Yolanda writes, “I am happy to share that it’s been a pretty good week…What is a good week? For me, it’s about more bright moments of ‘I’ve got this, I CAN DO THIS!’ than usual. Treatments, pain and severe fatigue still keep me in bed 18 out of my 24 hours each day, but I am grateful for the luxury of reading and writing again. Healing the brain is a slow process and on its own clock, but I am for sure making steady progress–one day at a time.”

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Heather Dubrow and Kyle Richards

Kim Richards and Faye Resnick were the hot topics on part two of Heather Dubrow and Kyle Richards‘ chat on Heather Dubrow’s World. (In case you missed it, Kyle and Heather talked about Real Housewives of Beverly Hills and Real Housewives of Orange County on part one.)

Kyle admits she doesn’t like to talk about Kim around Lisa Rinna. “She’s had problems with Kim so that’s why it’s uncomfortable for me to speak about anything regarding Kim with Lisa Rinna. They left off so badly that I don’t feel comfortable talking about Kim with her. It makes me feel guilty.”

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Kristen Doute

While appearing on Watch What Happens Live on Monday night it slipped that Kristen Doute had recently been kicked out of PUMP by Lisa Vanderpump. Kristen ‘Plead the 5th’ on what exactly happened to get her expelled, but later  spilled the information on twitter. 

According to Kristen the Vanderpump Rules star was doing promotion for WWHL when a drunk James Kennedy became aggressive towards her but Lisa blamed Kristen. 

Lisa told me I’m not welcome at Pump anymore after sloppy, drunk James got in my/Carter’s face. I was there to do something for #WWHL,” accused Kristen. Carter is Kristen’s new boyfriend. Lisa immediately replied that Kristen’s recollection wasn’t true. 

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Lisa Rinna confronts Erika Jayne

Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star Lisa Rinna is not here for Yolanda Foster twisting the truth, nor Erika Jayne avoiding the truth. About last night’s episode, she blogged, “Well now. That was something, wasn’t it?”

Lisa brought attention to the fact that she said she was happy to move forward with Yolanda in her blog last week, adding, “Clearly, I was the only one who felt this way, because she certainly didn’t have any intention of letting me move forward based on the way she used me as a scapegoat with Lisa Vanderpump and Kyle Richards during their lunch.”

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Erika Girardi gets defensive over Yolanda's Lymes

Erika Girardi-Jayne showed some colors that weren’t pink and sparkly, but rather murky and c-nty on last night’s episode of Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills. If there are two definitions of the word “c-u-next-Tuesday-y,” Erika gave us both in the form of new personality called Erika Payne. I expected a little more honesty from Erika. We’re talking about a woman who prances around with her hoohah out lecturing about confidence and self-acceptance, yet she effortlessly lied to a group of women, not caring that one of them could lose friends over it. Interesting indeed, Ms. Hoohah of the Beverly Hills. Are the Lymes of Yolanda Foster worth all that? 

I really like Erika in general, outside of her relationship with Yolanda in which she is being used (willingly? accidentally?) as a patsy for whatever game it is Yolanda is playing. The reunion should be very interesting! 

On the bright side Eileen Davidson melts my heart for being so down-to-earth, silly, and admitting that she doesn’t give a flying $4,000 designer f–k about materialism. Eileen truly has confidence and doesn’t need all the trappings of attention-seeking “c-nty” necklaces to get a reaction out of “old women,” or the inflated status that swinging around a designer bag gives you. She’s as anti-Hollywood Friend as you can get, without needing some sort of validating T-Shirt proclaiming, “Proud To Not Be A Hollywood Friend #DreamTeam” – you know, the BS Yolanda is always shoving in everyone’s face to make them question themselves. Eileen is my Spirit Housewife. 

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Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star Yolanda Foster

It’s Tuesday, which means Real Housewives of Beverly Hills is on tonight.

Also, it’s a day that ends in -y, which means Yolanda Foster is on Instagram.

Yolanda shared the picture above, adding, “When the Google Search in your brain fails you……..  #NoWordRetrieval  #MemoryLoss  #SlowMentalSpeed #NeuroBorreliosis #TheInvisibleDisease #LYMEDISEASEAWERENESS A recent study indicated chronic neurologic abnormalities may emerge anywhere from 1 month to 14 years after infection. Like syphilis, Lyme Borreliosis may remain latent and asymptomatic for a long period of time, despite having received long term antibiotic therapy. #WeMustFindACure

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Brandi Glanville and Lisa Rinna Twitter War

Brandi Glanville has had enough of her former The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills co-stars talking about her – that’s rich coming from her, no? – so she launched a “Brandi Fires Back” segment on her podcast last week. Brandi said she just wanted a chance to defend herself, but true to form, she used her platform to call Kyle Richards and Lisa Vanderpump cowardly bitches.

Lisa Rinna, whose lips fingers were made for talking tweeting, took to Twitter to stick up for Lisa and Kyle. “Shut up Brandi Glanville,” she tweeted. “Leave Lisa Vanderpump and Kyle Richards alone.” Lisa also told Brandi to use her podcast to “educate and inspire” and to move on. We knew it was only a matter of sobering up time before Brandi told Lisa to STFU. That time has come.

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Katie Maloney launches Pucker & Pout

Last night on Vanderpump Rules Katie Maloney launched her beauty blog Pucker & Pout. I’ll let “Katie Maloney + makeup and fashion tips” sink in a bit before moving on… But anyways, congratulations! 

Katie has been working hard to build her blog and decides to throw an industry launch party to debut it to the world, so she can begin making money. What Katie really wants, however, is an exclusive party with a tightly-controlled guest list, so she can wander around SUR pointing at people with her new Scheana Marie witch’s talon nails snapping, “Invited!” “Not Invited!” as she plucks the leaves, one by one, off Lisa Vanderpump‘s 100 year-old custom-cultivated tulips originally cuttings from Josephine Bonaparte’s garden, once watered with the blood of Napoleon (can you tell I’ve been watching War & Peace? It’s like Vanderpump Rules with more complicated names, more conniving, decent fitting clothing, more lying, and swords instead of cocktail stirrers). 

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