Carole Radziwill is scrambling for allies now that Bethenny Frankel has thrown her to the wolves. Or maybe it’s the other way around, because Bethenny has cozied up to to Sonja Morgan – who’s desperate (re: ostracized) enough to do her bidding, if you will. Essentially we’re four episodes in to this season of Real Housewives Of New York and the crazy clusterf–kery is already off the skids! Yay.
In her blog Carole breaks down Tinsley Mortimer‘s fall into a death trance upon sighting Scott, Bethenny’s two-faced antics, and why she finally decided to put her big girl panties on and invite Luann de Lesseps for a sobering tea.
First up, Carole has no sympathy for Sonja T. Morgan. “…Sonja doesn’t make sense in 140 characters or 140 paragraphs,” says Carole. “Sonja has been badmouthing Tinsley from the jump, she called Dorinda fat and was disrespectful of her late husband, she called Ramona a piece of sh–…Perhaps this is a source of some of Sonja’s pain. But is it really that confusing as to why she’s a leper and no one wants to sit near her at the lunch table?”
As Carole also learned, you can lead a Tinsley to Scott, but you can’t make her ‘keep it cute‘: And for the record, according to Carole, “Keep it cute” means:
1. Don’t fall to the floor when the boyfriend you haven’t seen in 2 months arrives at your door, Officer and a Gentleman style, to sweep you off to Chicago.
2. Don’t start to sob. Maintain cool composure.
3. Don’t put him on the spot by asking him if he’s now your boyfriend.
4. Don’t then smash dead flowers into the garbage. Definitely don’t tell him you saved the flowers because I brought them to cheer you up after your break-up.
5. Don’t call your crazy mom before wheels are up on the plane, and you’re safely en route to Chicago.
Tinsley did all of the above, but she and Scott still managed to “their relationship back on track.” As for Adam and Carole, “Well…let’s say we were never friends with benefits unless the benefit was monogamy.”
Thankfully, another relationship that got back on track was Carole’s ‘friendship-ish’ with Luann! Finally. Kinda? “This may appear like one of those contractually-obligated sit downs, the ‘fall out’ brunch where we discuss what was discussed at the last brunch. But it actually isn’t,” insists Carole. “I asked Luann if she’d come to tea because I wanted to make it nice. Honestly, our friendship is too superficial to be this complicated.”
But gain one friend, lose another! As is the sad case of Carolenny. Bethole? Whatever – they’re broken up, so it doesn’t matter. Anyway! “One friendship I didn’t think was superficial was mine with Bethenny. Although I recently read she said it sort of was…so my bad,” Carole admits. “I barely recognize the girl on TV making silly passive aggressive comments—one after another.
“So far this season it appears that Bethenny has decided I’m not such a great friend,” Carole laments. “She can’t reach me on my phone, I don’t reply to her texts in a timeframe she considers appropriate, I didn’t pony up charity money early enough to make her cut, and I’m generally not interested in what’s going on in her life. None of that is true. But why let the truth get in the way of a good storyline?”
“In real life we were both busy, but things seemed cool, or so I thought,” explains Carole. “Spoiler Alert: It takes me a few weeks to catch on to what she is saying about me—I’d say by the Berkshires I begin to see the whole picture. Fun times!!!” Carole also takes issue with Bethenny “worrying if I have the constitution for devastation” in her decision to invite Dorinda Medley to Puerto Rico.
As Carole reminds us she spent the early part of her career in journalism working in war-torn countries. “I thought her experience in Puerto Rico would have been something that brought us closer. We’d both now seen the aftermath of destruction—natural and man-made. But that didn’t happen. And I’m beginning to understand why. I guess it didn’t fit into her Carole and Tinsley are thick as thieves and all they care about are clothes and lashes storyline. Is anyone buying this crap? Stay tuned next week its gets better! Gotta run…getting a spray tan and a new set of lashes! ”
TELL US – HAVE CAROLE AND LU GENUINELY PUT THEIR DIFFERENCES BEHIND THEM?
[Photo Credit: Bravo]