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LeeANne

Y’all. LeeAnne Locken has stolen the show with her meditative bowls and never-ending dress situation. Sure, on the last season of Real Housewives of Dallas, LeeAnne was scaring us all with sordid details about the Round-Up and her murder hands. Lately, Brandi Redmond has actually made LeeAnne somewhat (somewhat, but not really) sympathetic to viewers. Not to mention, it was nice to see her getting along with Stephanie Hollman and finding an ally in Kameron Wescott as her friendship with D’Andra Simmons crumbled.

LeeAnne has a lot to say about Brandi’s behavior this season, and she finds it laughable that her nemesis could stir up trouble and start fights only to cry the victim card. Hmmmm…does that pattern sound familiar to her? Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, so perhaps LeeAnne should take Brandi’s boorishness as a compliment. Regardless, I cannot wait for the RHOD reunion tonight!

LeeAnne discussed the Season 3 finale episode in a Bravo blog post. None of you will be shocked to learn that LeeAnne’s post is, ahem, a tad verbose. I tried to pare it down to the basics. Brandi and the great phone clone of twenty-eighteen. If you want to read her gush about her upcoming nuptials, feel free to check out her Bravo blog in its entirety.

LeeAnne clarifies, “Now to wrap up last weeks #clonegate. In case you missed my blog, which came out two days ago, I never said I cloned ‘Brandi’s phone’! I said whoever took my phone, when they tried to hack into it, it shut down and cloned the phone of the person who stole mine! See! It was a perfect trap! If Brandi didn’t take my phone, she has no reason to be upset! So why is she soooo upset?!” I am not even going to try to understand her semantics games.

She continues, “I love how Brandi is telling Stephanie there is only so many times she can forgive me when she has just as much for me to forgive her for! It’s a two-way street. Until she can take responsibility for her side of the street, she’s right, we don’t have much to talk about!”

LeeAnne came at Stephanie. Is their new friendship over already? She wrote, “Now for Stephanie saying that Kameron always has my back… look in the mirror! You ALWAYS have Brandi’s back no matter what she says or does! You judge me so much harder than you do her. When are you going to stop being afraid of Brandi and tell her when she is wrong?”

When she says MEAN below-the-belt stuff! It hurts me to know that I am still the bad guy in Stephanie’s eye. It hurts to know that because of her fear, she will always let whatever Brandi does slide. I’m just looking for a fair world. Silly me!”

Taking shots at her former bestie’s marriage while disrespecting Momma Dee, LeeAnne seethes, “Why does D’Andra need to call her mommy to talk about seeing me and Kam? Your husband is sitting next to you! This is a big sign to me of whose opinion she respects, and it’s not Jeremy’s! Why was it a low blow to say that if we weren’t talking I wouldn’t have invited you? It’s HONESTY! You should try it sometime! It was not a low blow or meant to be hurtful. Girl, it’s a big world, and you better put your big girl panties on!”

Is it just me, or did LeeAnne write her blog while watching the show in real time? She moves onto her Clueless combo with Kameron, asserting, “Everyone talking sh– about me getting a matching outfit with Kam is ridiculous! Because it’s me, it’s OK to talk sh–? Y’all are just jealous that Kam and I actually have fun together! Sorry biatches! And then notice the second I walk away they all tell Kam how pretty she looks! Who is up whose ass? And now Brandi is telling Kam she loves her! #asskissingatitsfinest”

Why, yes, YES she IS watching in real time. LeeAnne urges, “OMG! Everyone go back, rewind, and listen….Brandi just said, ‘All I know is I picked up her phone from the bar because she left it in the bar’ Uhm, I thought someone handed you my phone when they found it in the cushions? GURL! Do you remember all the things you say? You need to start taking notes, cause you are looking like a big fat liar!” Good catch there, LeeAnne

LeeAnne then notes, “Let me be very clear: I never used D’Andra to ‘social climb,’ because I never needed or wanted to social climb. I certainly cleaned up plenty of her social mistakes for her, however! Now tell me again, who needed whom? Then when I address D’Andra saying that her mother told her I called her an alcoholic. and I said I would clear that up with DeeBrandi goes off! Not only does she start screaming at me, but she is taking step after step in an aggressive manner towards me! Why are stepping in my face and yelling at me? I want you all to clearly hear what she is saying! ‘Do you think that you are better than the rest of us? YES YOU DO!'”

RELATED: LeeAnne Locken Says She Had To Dim Her Light To Be Friends With D’Andra Simmons; Thinks Brandi Redmond Has Not Grown As A Person

She continues, “Here is what we have all been waiting for all season, Brandi’s reason for her visceral hatred of me: It’s her insecurity. She feels insecure about how secure I live my life. I have never thought I was better than anyone! I have never said I was better than anyone! This is coming from Brandi, not me! That is why this is her problem,” adding, “And now what she does every single time, even though she started this, is go off and cry and be the victim! You can’t start a fight and be the victim! Grow up! I was having a conversation, and she elevated it! She took steps towards me, stepping into my personal space to set me off! Then runs off and cries like I started it.”

Finally, LeeAnne has said her peace…or at least what she isn’t saving for the reunion! She concludes, “When I lay down in the grass to cry and beg God for help, it’s because I am coming off my amygdala emotionally hijacking me, and I’m crashing. All the energy I used to posture in a defensive state is crashing out of me and tears are all I have left. Drama Queen, yes! But y’all…I AM EXHAUSTED! My weave is exhausted! The panty liner in my underwear is exhausted!”

And on that note, I’m exhausted. And frazzled. And super excited about tonight’s RHOD reunion!

TELL US – DO YOU BUY INTO ALL OF LEEANNE’S ASSERTIONS? WHAT ARE YOU EXPECTING FROM TONIGHT’S RHOD REUNION? 

[Photo Credit: Bravo]

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