Kameron Westcott

On last night’s Real Housewives Of Dallas, the ladies smashed each other, bashed each other, and then walked on broken glass with each other’s feelings.

I don’t know what kind of therapist LeeAnne Locken is seeing, but apparently, anything to avoid actual therapy. She’s gone from massaging her amygdala and zapping it with zen, to slamming a sledgehammer into a mirror while fake crying about how she will not let anger destroy very real friendships with very fake friends.

The only misconception that got smashed real good though t’was the idea that LeeAnne is truly friends with D’Andra Simmons. Lord – these two are more wrecked than a dressing room after a debutante ball!

Last night the Real Housewives Of Dallas left Beaver Creek to return to their roots: the rodeo! D’Andra Simmons celebrated her 49th birthday and some of her friends treated her like a little girl who was gonna eat too much cake and make herself sick!

Cary Deuber is still in Jackson Hole Wyoming, and Stephanie Hollman is in Italy pasta-scarfing all her feelings about Kameron Westcott away. Much better than therapy if you ask me! This means Brandi Redmond‘s left to be the one-woman fun machine. She did not disappoint, although poor old LeeAnne Locken was trying to nip at her heels.

LeeAnne loves a competition over nothing, doesn’t she? Is she in therapy for this or does she not recognize that it’s a problem? Last week she argued with D’Andra over who was queen of nothing, which resulted in sexual assault on a K-Cup; this week she’s competing with Brandi for the title of D’Andra’s BFF. LeeAnne one-upped D’Andra’s K-Cup with an audition for a Def Leopard video – except MTV stop making music videos about 300 years ago, about the time LeeAnne should’ve handled her insecurities.

Peace, love, and ice cold hearts? On last night’s Real Housewives Of Dallas Beaver Creek continued to offer up its many splendored dramas and arguments, but this time the only thing that got naked was D’Andra Simmons‘s foot! Kameron Westcott is OK with podiatry nudity – after all one has to get pedicures!

It’s a crisp, sunny morning in Beaver Creek and it’s as if the previous night of arguing over bashing over Brandi Redmond‘s baby Bruin never happened. At all. Freshly fallen snow has wipeth clean the slate and painted it as white as Kameron’s undead skin. Well, kinda. In actuality, everyone blames their lack of sanity on high altitude and high alcohol content.

But at least Kameron didn’t stage an insurrection to forcibly throw Stephanie Hollman from her house, leaving her to trudge to the PJ platform in nothing more than striped PJ’s like a common criminal. Although Kam’s feelings are still hurt. After all, why wasn’t she inner-circle enough to know about Brandi’s baby? Um, probably because, as D’Andra later points out, because Kam doesn’t even like Brandi or Stephanie! Kameron essentially only tolerates Stephanie because Travis is wealthy and influential. Which is probably what Kameron considers the basis of an everlasting friendship anyway…