Why Erika Jayne’s Lack of Empathy Is Extremely Troubling (But Not Surprising)

Erika Jayne
(Photo by: Emily Shur/Bravo)

Erika Jayne of the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills has been called a lot of things in her life—gold digger, cold, witchy. However, she never seemed phased by what others thought of her. During Season 12, Erika had an out-of-body experience when she made it very clear she didn’t care about the victims of her ex-husband Tom Girardi’s embezzlement because, evidently, she was a victim herself.

After a RHOBH season of self-destructive behavior, Erika reached out to Dr. Jenn Mann, who assured her it was okay to grieve a divorce. But the good old doctor is still trying to have Erika see her faults. 

What Is Empathy

Erika Jayne
(Photo by Denise Truscello/Getty Images for Live Nation Las Vegas)

So far, on Erika’s therapy journey, she has learned not to mix alcohol with Lexapro, and that’s about it. However, during her therapy session on the RHOBH Season 13 premiere, Erika was told to give her friends some grace and show empathy. Erika had explained she felt she didn’t know how to be a good friend to the women in her group. In asking a simple question, “How to be a better friend?” the Pretty Mess singer is surprised to learn that she was going to “need to have some empathy for them.” 

The Word Empathy Was Alien to Erika

erika jayne
(Photo by Denise Truscello/Getty Images for Live Nation Las Vegas)

The explanation seemed simple enough, but Erika’s face looked confused. Erika stunned viewers when she asked where the ability to empathize comes from and how does one develop that trait. The question was troublesome since the comment hinted at Erika truly only caring about her world. According to Huffington Post, a person may lack empathy if they are “angry, protecting themselves, scared of intimacy, or struggling to identify themselves.”  

Erika has been in fight or flight mode since the news of Tom’s shenanigans broke. What the outlet says makes sense, and it is possible that Erika was angry and protecting herself. There were many examples of her lashing out during Season 12. She could also be frightened to trust the women in her group with sensitive information. But all this should be addressed and not used as an excuse to be cruel to her friends. 

Erika Could Be Putting on an Act

erika jayne
(Photo by MEGA/GC Images)

It’s hard for most fans to comprehend that a person doesn’t know how to empathize since you learn the definition in Psych 101. The fact that Erika had to ask for steps on how to make herself seem empathic was troublesome. As the doctor explained, she should try to put herself in others’ shoes, yet it almost felt like an act. Surely, Erika knows how to feel bad for others—she just may not care. Erika is told to take the high road, but the performance left many feeling like she deserved an Oscar.

As Erika sat perfectly still, she nodded and pretended to digest what she was being told. The robotic response made fans feel that she was just planning how to implement the tools for being empathetic rather than truly embracing the feeling. Frankly, if she acted this well at her Las Vegas gig, maybe the tickets wouldn’t be sold at rock-bottom prices

Not Taking Accountability

ERIKA JAYNE
(Photo by: Charles Sykes/Bravo via Getty Images)

Erika has not been one to take much responsibility for her actions. Therefore, it doesn’t come as a surprise that she would have no idea how to relate to her friends or show any form of empathy. The Rollercoaster singer has given multiple shady answers to give herself a storyline. She often tries to explain her way out of trouble instead of just saying, “I’m sorry.” 

Without a doubt, Erika thrives on the feeling of only having to care about herself and her needs. Hell, it must be nice to wake up every day in your own little world and do or say whatever you want. When under attack, aka asked to sympathize, Erika’s quick to turn the tables and double down on her mean words. Even though Erika admitted she “was getting hit on all sides and I just needed a moment to catch my breath in this group,” it doesn’t clean the slate when it comes to how vicious she has been. 

TELL US – DO YOU THINK ERIKA IS LYING ABOUT KNOWING WHAT EMPATHY IS?

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