Welcome, friends, to The Valley Season 3 Episode 5 recap. Last time, Kristen and Luke’s date night spiraled into an argument. Plus, Danny and Jason’s only common ground is that they don’t want to be friends. Here’s what happened in The Valley Season 3 Episode 5: “The Hive Mentality.”
What happened in The Valley Season 3 Episode 5?
Brittany is tired of being in the middle of her friends’ drama. As a result, Janet decided to try to mend her fractured relationships with her co-stars. Finally, Zack and Janet had a breakthrough.
Michelle opened up about her father in The Valley
Michelle took her daughter, Isabella, to gymnastics, and Nia brought her son, Asher, along. Then, Michelle shared that her whole life revolved around gymnastics growing up, and she demonstrated that she still has the moves. She stopped at 15 years old, when her parents divorced.
“Gymnastics forced me to have a very disciplined life, and I had a very strict schedule growing up, and I enjoyed it,” she said in her confessional. Michelle also discussed her father’s struggle with an undiagnosed mental illness. “My dad has never been diagnosed, but in his mind, he thought that there was people after us,” she explained. “He thought it would be safe for us if he just left and we were home alone,”
Michelle told Nia, “He had asked if it was okay if he left my mom and I.” Michelle told him that she understood his feelings. Her parents still loved each other, and he attended Michelle’s mom’s funeral.
Meanwhile, Kristen, Brittany, and Zack met up to get spray tans. Plus, Brittany was getting a Brazilian, with Kristen there for emotional support. In Brittany’s words, she will be “bald as a biscuit.” Then, when it was Kristen’s turn, Zack walked in. “I think I saw your uterus!” he exclaimed.
When Zack asked about Luke and Kristen’s date night, she said that Luke “doesn’t respect what I want.” She added, “And he’s got to stop bringing up how much he f*cking hates L.A. all the time.”
In her talking head, Kristen explained that she and Luke had an agreement. Before Kaia reached school age, “We would move, and we would be closer to family. We would have more land.” Finally, Zack pointed out that Kristen has some “past trauma” from prior relationships and tends to “go for the jugular.” He suggested couples counseling to help Luke and Kristen communicate better.
Jesse is no longer the alpha in The Valley
Meanwhile, Jesse, his daughter Isabella, and his girlfriend, Lacy Nicole, went out for lunch. When Jesse urged Isabella to dance for Lacy, she responded, “I actually don’t want you to force her to do anything for me because she is not a clown at the circus.”
So, a producer asked Jesse, “Everyone says you’re the beta in this relationship, right?” Jesse replied, “Yeah. The beta. She is certainly an alpha. Hates my storytelling. She is straight to the point,” he added.
When they discussed how Jesse is a hoarder, he referenced Lacy’s “end of the world go bag.” She replied, “Can you please not? It’s a private thing.” I love a woman who is prepared.
In her confessional, Lacy admitted, “During like COVID, my TikTok algorithm was like doomsday bunkery, and one night, I went down the rabbit hole of doomsday things you would need …” When the producer asked if this is “like a bomb-proof shelter,” Lacy responded, “Yeah. It’s off the grid. But it’s not like underground. I don’t think it’s nuke-proof.” She added, “It’s doomsday lite.”
Janet’s game night is a bust
Janet’s game night was held at a brewery. She invited Danny and Nia, who decided to stay home. In the end, only Brittany, Michelle, Lala, Schwartz, and some other friends showed up.
Meanwhile, Brittany has invited everyone to her pool party ahead of San Diego. “I feel like there’s a lot of people I’ve tried having conversations with and stuff that has not gone well,” Janet said. Then, Lala revealed that Zack called her and detailed everything that Janet had done wrong, and it was a long list. “I know Zack, and I need to have a serious conversation. All I want is peace. I know it’s just going to be little bullsh*t things that he’s just nitpicking,” Janet said in her talking head.
“I don’t want it to be a hive mind,” Brittany stated. What?! “It is that, though. It’s 10 against one,” Janet stated. She continued, “Danny ‘liked’ stuff, saying that Jason likes to see me have sex with other men in front of him. Why is that okay, but I’m not allowed to talk about what he’s done?” she exclaimed.
However, Brittany is tired of being dragged into everyone’s drama. “Let me like enjoy my f*cking life,” Brittany commented. She urged an emotional Janet to talk to people at the pool party. “I want peace. I’m afraid I’m going to lose you guys over this sh*t,” Janet admitted.
Pool party drama in The Valley
At the pool party, Brittany’s boyfriend, Brandon Hanson, was playing beer pong with the guys. When questioned about singles night, Schwartz admitted that he “kind of digs somebody.” Then Jesse told Michelle that he thought that she and Schwartz were dating. “This looks like a love match to me,” he remarked.
Then, Brandon jumped into the drama when Kristen mentioned Janet. I sense a troubling theme. “Be nice, Kristen. Be your sweet, lovable self, for your love of Brittany, ’cause it stresses Brittany out,” he said. “She should tell that to her,” Kristen replied, referencing Janet. “I’m telling it to you, though,” Brandon stated.
In her talking head, Kristen expertly slammed Brandon, verbalizing what we are all thinking. “Brandon has a very tiny lane in Brittany’s life. And he needs to stay in it. Like, mind your business, bro,” Kristen said.
Meanwhile, Zack pulled Luke away for a private catch-up. Apparently, Kristen texted Zack that morning that Luke was “in a bad mood.”
“There are times when I feel like I’m fighting for us, and she’s fighting to show me that I’m wrong,” Luke explained. He added that he feels “anything I do is heavily scrutinized,” while “the only time I bring up any criticism to Kristen is about how she talks to me.” Once again, Zack urged Luke to go to therapy so that someone could help mediate their issues.
“I’ve never been with a woman through her pregnancy, birth, postpartum,” Luke noted in his confessional. “This is all new to me. And I know that this is a version of Kristen that hopefully won’t last.” Oof.
Janet issues an apology in The Valley
Zack decided to talk to Janet. She said that her lesson from last year was, “Shut the f*ck up and listen a little bit more.” She explained that she is working on that issue. However, Zack was already losing patience. “I feel like this is a hard conversation for me to even start, because I don’t want to do this AGAIN,” he said. So, Janet mentioned trying to “co-exist” and find a way to “get over this bullsh*t.”
Then, Zack brought it back to pool day, when Janet claimed that Kristen “kicked me out of the house.” Right away, Janet admitted that he was correct and that her word choice mattered. “Sorry. We’re going to other people,” Zack remarked. “How do you feel about Nia and Danny right now?”
Janet said that she didn’t want to discuss other people in the friend group. “When you take things to a certain level, you want destruction,” Zack told Janet. “You want to destroy the other person, and then you’ll accept them back.”
However, Janet praised how Zack handled being friends with Nia and Danny, and Melissa and Jasmine. “You acknowledged what happened without involving yourself while being supportive to both friends,” Janet said. “That is something I did not do right.”
Then she apologized for hurting Zack. “This is what I wanted to hear from you, and I love this,” Zack stated. Later, Janet wanted to smoke some weed, and Kristen decided to join her. “This is not an olive branch. This is not a peace pipe,” Kristen said in her talking head. As Lala observed, this fun party was “the calm before the storm.”
Scenes from the upcoming trip rolled, then “To Be Continued” flashed on the screen. Uh-oh!
The Valley airs Wednesdays at 8/7c on Bravo. Episodes will stream on Peacock.
TELL US – WHAT DID YOU THINK OF THE VALLEY SEASON 3 EPISODE 5? WILL JANET AND ZACK’S TRUCE LAST?
