On last night’s Vanderpump Rules Tom Sandoval got bit by the itsy-crazy spider and lost his head. That spider was the black widow of man-sanity!
Charli Burnett and Dayna Kathan are both finishing their training at SUR. While Charli is feeling right at home in the bosom of Scheana Marie‘s attentions, Dayna is feeling ostracized. Being called a mini Scheana Marie is definitely NOT a compliment, and considering that Charli claims she’s never eaten pasta she is not gong to fit in well here because it is literally ALL about the pasta!
Scheana is trying to play mind games with Dayna by pretending the still has her acrylic claws into Max Boyens. Scheana shows up at SUR to pick up a uniform and announces that she’s going to crash boys night to confront Max for calling her “boy crazy.” Because nothing says ‘I’m completely sane and not at all desperate’ like wearing an ill-fitting, cleavage baring dress and interrupting a bro-down to discuss about relationship boundaries with a person you’ve never had a relationship with outside of sending him a stalking device FOR THANKSGIVING.
We are only two episodes in with the current Vanderpump Rules season, and it’s already shaping up to be the girls vs. Kristen Doute. Yes, I know that not every woman is involved in this feud, but Katie Maloney and Stassi Schroeder are over Kristen’s confusing relationship with Brian Carter and the feud is eclipsing the season.
Lala Kent even got up in Kristen’s face during the premiere episode to share her opinions. It’s unclear what happened throughout the course of filming, but as of this moment, in the present day, Kristen is still on the outs with Stassi and Katie, her longtime best friends.
Vanderpump Rules has found itself at a crosshairs. Last night I witnessed Jax Taylor and Katie Maloney behave like mature-ish adults as they attempted to set some reasonable boundaries with Kristen Doute and Brian Carter about how their toxic codependency is affecting everyone else’s lives.
I mean I know Jax was just cosplaying the dad from Family Ties because he’s about to be a married
adulterer adulter soon, but this show is not supposed to be about capable adults acting accordingly. Vanderpump Rules is supposed to be about drunken, unhinged twenty-somethings who screw, scheme, and cry their way through terrible choices and still emerge with flawless skin.
On that vein, absolutely nobody cares about Jax’s wedding to Brittany Cartwright. Brittany sincerely believes everyone is as invested in her bridal registry and knot.com page as she is. Also this wedding that she’s planning has absolutely nothing to do with Jax, who might as well be a rent-a-fiance from some Hallmark Movie about proving to your judgmental small town relatives that you’re not an unmarriageable career woman, repugnant to blandly attractive men in tight sweaters. This wedding is about Brittany living out her fantasy, and her friends would rather let her merry hijack them than Kristen’s misery. I don’t blame them!
Now that Vanderpump Rules Season 8 has (finally) arrived, the cast members are doing their thing to promote the show. And this means interviews on interviews.
Jax Taylor and Brittany Cartwright have been chatting about their new lives as newlyweds and their plans to add to the family. On yesterday’s episode of Pop of the Morning, Jax was asked, “Who out of the cast would you let babysit your child?” And he had a pretty surprising answer.
Last night was the season 8 premiere of Vanderpump Rules, and honestly EIGHT YEARS. EIGHT YEARS! You’d think these people would’ve grown up some, but alas here they are, still filling squirt guns with tequila and fighting about who’s a bad friend.
For many a’seasons I’ve been saying it’s high time for a cast change; one which acknowledges and reflects that the OGs are, well, missing the natural collagen in their faces and therefore no longer eligible to play the role of struggling bartender straight off the bus from St. Louis. Last night Vanderpump Rules finally paid credence to that, and it almost felt as if we were going into this season with the realization that it would be the last for the original crew. I’ll wear sequins to their funeral, play Solid Gold in downtempo, and drink PumpTinis with the rims salted with dehydrated tears.
A new era of Vanderpump Rules is upon us. The “kids” we’ve been watching for seven seasons are all grown up. Well, sort of. When Season 8 kicks off, Jax Taylor and Brittany Cartwright are planning their wedding and getting settled in their new home.
Katie Maloney and Tom Schwartz invite everyone over to celebrate their new house. Tom Sandoval and Ariana Madix abandoned their apartment for a house as well. But, the new season isn’t all about real estate and maturity.
Everyone grab your tiny violins, it’s time to talk about Kristen Doute. The former SURver is heading into her 8th season on Vanderpump Rules and it looks like things are getting lonely for her. As you may know, Kristen is currently estranged from on/off best friends, Katie Maloney and Stassi Schroeder. She has been noticeably absent from any and all of Stassi’s wedding preparations amid confirmed reports her relationships are on life support.
Kristen also broke up with her boyfriend, Brian Carter, at the end of last season. Poor Carter
never worked had a problem with maintaining income that would support paying rent. For some reason this heavily impacted both Stassi and Katie’s life and factored into their struggling friendship with Kristen. Since then, Kristen has been busy with her new home and even started writing a self-help book, encouraging women to “own their crazy”. But don’t reach for the tissues quite yet. At least one old friend is standing by Kristen’s side and even showed up for a holiday photo.
Peace and harmony amongst the Vanderpump Rules Witches of WeHo trio of Stassi Schroeder, Kristen Doute and Katie Maloney was bound to end at some point. We’ve seen the three at odds many times before. For instance, when Kristen admitted to sleeping with Stassi’s ex-boyfriend, Jax Taylor. Or when Stassi treated Katie and Kristen like crap, moved to New York to be with Patrick Meagher, and then came groveling back when she couldn’t make it on her own.
However, the trio was in a good place last season. The only hitch happened to be Kristen’s
deadbeat boyfriend Brian Carter. Stassi and Katie made it loud and clear they felt Brian was taking advantage of Kristen, but Kristen wasn’t having it. Still, everything seemed fine between them. Until the past several months, that is.