Real Housewives Of New York is like being in city traffic and hearing a loud bang and not knowing where it came from and whether or not it’s a gun going off, a car backfiring, or Ramona Singer exploding in your face.
Luann de Lesseps is in full hoity-toity mode. Cabaret Star has replaced Countess as Luann’s new schtick, and she invited all the girls to a Halloween party where she’s performing. The theme is insane asylum – perfect for this group! Luann is dressed as a sexy nurse, but Bethenny Frankel comes as a slutty guardian angel, aka Luann’s savior. Was that shady or unintentional?
Luann’s performance is supposed to start at 11, but of course, the Countess is late, girls! After waiting around for 2 hours, when Luann couldn’t even come down to say hello, or invite them backstage to her dressing room, Bethenny leaves explaining that her babysitter is expecting her.
Karen wasn’t going to fall for that though. During Gizelle’s first call, Karen told her not to come over. When she called again, Karen said that her mysterious friend Matt Byars would meet her at the door instead. In response, Gizelle refused to deal with Matt, who she dislikes for no discernible reason. So what was Gizelle thinking durring what is bound to be labeled as cookiegate?
And it was at that same party that something a little unusual happened. OK-lets be honest-Sonja and practically everything about her is a “little unusual”-but at the party, a seemingly random woman came up and kissed her-passionately. And Sonja didn’t really seem to mind. A bit. Was this some overly enthusiastic fan? An attention-getting set-up by Ms. Morgan? We’ll probably never know. But we are now getting more of the details on Sonja’s real views about dipping into the lady pond. And they might surprise you.
Real Housewives of New YorkSeason 11 has had a lot of Tinsley Mortimer-focused storylines. No one saw that coming. However, Tinsley’s mom Dale Mercer is doing whatever she can to be on this season be there for her daughter. Dale has come up to New York City to “get her hair done” several times season.
She even has her own on-camera interviews. No one else’s relatives get that kind of shine on this show. At this point, it’s safe to expect a Dale appearance during the reunion. However, things just got very heavy during the last episode of RHONY. Dale shaded Tinsley whenever possible. To add insult to injury, she complimented Sonja Morgan a million times over. It all culminated in a tear-filled conversation at the end of the episode when Tinsley cried about her breakup with Scott Kluth. Meanwhile, Dale was less than warm in response.
Last night the Real Housewives Of NewYork went to the Big Apple Circus where Sonja Morgan lifted a random baby from the lap of the mother who was sitting behind her, and held it in her own lap so the child could get a better look at the action. That baby sat there stoically and dry-eyed as the adult women around her sloshed popcorn-essenced cocktails in her face and probably assumed the wetness on their dress was because the baby pooped herself. You know this child was forever changed, and all-knowing from this experience, and someday, many moons from now will be gracing some future Bravo network as a Real Housealien Of Spaceship Villa Uranus in the year 2075.
Especially because just as randomly this baby’s honorary temporary godmother Sonja Morgan, of the Sexy J performing acrobatics troupe, passed her back to her mother, and hiked up her sequined mini dress before vaulting over the dividing wall right into the center ring to join the clowns. It’s as if Sonja was born for this moment, and never has she felt more at home. To somersault in heels, pantomime, and ad-lib, and if Luann de Lesseps doesn’t incorporate The Sexy J random circus into her cabaret halftime show (sponsored by Dale Mercer, of course) than she’s a bigger fool than even I thought possible.
You guys… I’m actually excited about this but Jill Zarin is back on tonight’s Real Housewives Of New York! Jill in small doses is sort of a delight and I’m actually glad we get to catch up on her and see how she’s doing after Bobby’s passing.
Of course, lots of other stuff also happens before Jill returns to our screens with a red-headed fury! Tinsley Mortimer runs away with the circus to escape her mother Dale Mercer haranguing her about her break up with Scott Kluth. Being back at the Big Apple Circus makes The Tinz turn into Sonja Morgan as she mourns her former life as New York’s premiere socialite, which spirals into wailing over her split from Scott.
Last night’s Real Housewives Of New York had it all: turtle time, flying trapezes, sexually harassing birds, meltdowns at premiere galas, breakups, brawls in the spa, makeups at the spa, ghosts of Sonja Morgan‘s past, and wrap dresses. You know, just an ordinary episode! (Seriously how is this one of the lower rated Housewives franchises?!)
Sonja is just strolling down the street with her coffee and her trendy patterned tights when a limousine window rolls down and a voice calls out from the dark, “Hey hooker…” Sonja doesn’t even flinch, she just keeps doing her Mary Tyler Moore strut with a distracted smile until the voice gets more persistent. But it’s just Bethenny Frankel! Sonja laughs because she assumed it was one if the regular people who call her a hooker during her morning coffee run! Where is Sonja getting her coffee from?