Last night Andy Cohen sat down the ever-so-crazy ladies of Real Housewives of New Jersey for a little tell-all dish session and some word association. Word association was the best part and if Teresa Giudice's skill at the game is any indication of how she did on the SAT's, well… errrr… yeah.
Other than word association, the flashback photos were A-MAZ-ZING. Lord knows I love an 80's Jem & The Holograms hairstyle. And speaking of 80's, 'Vacations all I ever wanted; Vacation time to get away… from RHONJ before it even started!' (Courtesy of The Bangles).
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The Watch What Happens Live special opened with Kathy Wakile, aka RHONJ wallpaper, because this lady seriously is the invisible woman. She got the least airtime of the group, but I actually thought she had some interesting things to say.
Rosie will be featured prominently in Kathy's storyline. "Everything's coming up Rosie," she said slightly sourly.
- On Growing Up With Teresa: "Teresa is Milania incarnated. She just had so much energy and attitude from a really young age. It was so much fun."
"A Gorga is a Gorga," Kathy added. "It just runs through their veins. They're so full of energy; you never know what you're gonna get. <snap> The Gorga switch!"
- On The Fight In Napa & The Reunion: "I was just trying to encourage her. Things got out of hand." When Teresa brought up Kathy's past marital problems and her father's death at the reunion, Kathy says she lost it. "It was really off-base."
"I apologized right away," she says of the comments she made about Teresa's dad. "It's just not me. And I don't like that. That was an ugly, mean Kathy – she never comes out. I really felt bad about that for a few weeks after." Teresa accepts Kathy's apology. "I don't know if my dad ever will!"
- On Juicy's C-U-N-T Phone Call: "I felt for Teresa. No wife wants to hear that about herself." And no wife wants to hear she tastes like fish on TV either. Kathy and Teresa are kindred spirits…
- On Teresa's Involvement In The Posche Fashion Show Set Up: "I think Teresa knew something was going on and she had an opportunity to warn Melissa something was happening. She didn't stop it."
I thought Caroline came across as very gracious. I loved the white suit, but her glasses were so distracting! I just wanted to reach through the TV and push them up. We literally sat through an hour of not seeing her eyeballs. It brought back memories of a certain Muppet:
Caroline reveals that she met Teresa through her sister, Dina Manzo, because the two worked at a makeup counter in the mall and became BFF.
Who on earth would let Teresa do their makeup? The "Old Teresa" was "vivacious, effervescent, fun, made you laugh, cute… loveable.'
- On Teresa Now: "She, to me, is an enigma. I can't hate her but sometimes I just wanna knock her out!"
- On meeting Jacqueline for the first time: "Jacqueline didn't get us at first. It took Jacqueline a long time to blend."
- On meeting Kathy: "I did not know Kathy existed until one day we got the phone call that she was on the show. I was a little mean to them [Kathy and Melissa] at first."
- On Teresa's Family Problems Being On The Show: "To me, there are some things in your life, in your world that are just not for sale." Says the
hypocritewoman who is discussing Al's infidelity this season! "To me, nothing was sacred in her life."
- Favorite RHONJ Moment: When Albie was kicked out of law school. Seriously? "It taught Albie that he wasn't alone." And apparently he inspired other learning disabilities kids. OK, then…
- On Feuding With Teresa: "She wasn't a nice person. There's plenty for everybody; there's no reason to put anybody down. And I felt that's what she was doing… to everyone." Caroline regrets her behavior in Napa. "These trips are torture. There were moments we had belly laughs; the next moment there was war."
- On Juicy's Phone Call: "I cried. I felt awful for her. I wish I could have called her, but I knew I couldn't because it would be taken the wrong way."
- On Teresa's Guilt At The Posche Fashion Show: "The truth is gonna come out… and I'm gonna reserve comment for now because it's only gonna get me in trouble."
Caroline says Teresa is STILL mad about the comment she made about her reunion dress. "She thinks I thought the dress was ugly, I just meant it wasn't appropriate for the occasion," Caroline laughs. Oh Teresa… Teresa makes no apologies for saying Caroline had "blubber." Caroline isn't upset. "52's gonna come knockin' on her door some day!"
- On Where They Go From Here: "I thought 'This is the end,'" after the reunion. "That feeling in the room was just so heavy and so toxic. I didn't know if we were gonna escalate out of the room. I thought, 'We can't work together anymore.'"
Teresa had a lot to say about everyone, but I thought she looked great and seemed a little bit more down to earth. And slightly – slightly – less defensive. She says she wants this season to bring the 'Old Teresa' back who is light-hearted and fun, but I'm not sure it's possible for that Teresa to return. Too much has happened, maybe.
- On Kathy: "There was a period [growing up] where we [our families] didn't speak. We got back together right before my Sweet Sixteen. Kathy did my makeup!"
- On Meeting Melissa For The First Time: "I accepted her, open arms."
- Favorite RHONJ Moment: Either Teresa didn't get the question or she really seriously does not care about her co-stars and this show. She said her favorite moment was making the NY Times Best Seller list. I think that may be a favorite "perk" of the show, but moment? No. Interesting…
- On Her temper: "I don't regret doing it [table flip]. Would I ever do it again? Probably not. Italians are passionate!" And somewhere in Italy, the government is filing a restraining order against RHONJ. "I hate to get that way, but I guess that's in my blood."
- On Things Falling Apart With Melissa: "After she had Antonia – that's when things started gettin' weird. Because of stupid things."
"If I have something to say to you, I'll say it and then it's over. I guess with her and my brother, like, they kept holding grudges. Like I would think everything was fine and then my brother would bring up things that happened like three years ago."
Personally I think Teresa and Melissa BOTH hold grudges! Neither one of these two can let. things. go. And they are both In denial.
- On Christmas Cookie-Gate (Teresa's version): "They were from ShopRite! Someone else in the family said somethin, like 'Who brings these kinda cookies?' I wasn't saying it to be mean, I was saying it so next time she would know not to bring those kinda cookies. She took it to a whole 'nother level!"
- On Who 'On Display' Was Really About: Teresa says her fans on twitter told her "She wrote that song about wanting to be you." As for what she believes, 'Copying is a form of flattery," she laughs.
- On Feuding With Caroline: "I felt betrayed and hurt. I didn't do anything intentionally to her. For her to come at me the way she did… I don't know why she did that…"
- On Juicy's C-U-N-T Phone Call: "It was a bad moment because it was on TV. He didn't really say it to me..," Teresa is still in incredible denial! "There's so many times I say to my girlfriends – maybe – that he's being a 'dick'!"
"If he wants to be with another girl, 'Bye!!,'" Teresa insists "I was upset for a few days, I made him sweat it out. And he felt bad too."
- On Her Involvement In The Posche Set Up: "Jacqueline pretty much implicated me. And that was a shock to me. We all knew something was going to happen. Every single Housewife."
- On The Brawls This Season: "There's gonna be two coming up." She's "embarrassed" about the one between the Joews. "I didn't want it to happen, but it's outta my control…"
Jacqueline's face does not look improved. I do not like the "work" she admitted to doing; which was a tummy tuck and a neck lift. She needs to cool it with the botox and stop channeling Adrienne Maloof.
Jacqueline says Nicholas' autism will be minimally shown on the show, which I think was definitely the way to go. Good decision Lauritas!
I didn't know Jacqueline had been friends with Teresa for 12 years. Jacqueline says 'the old Teresa' was "fun" and "We both enjoyed, like, family things together. And she got goofy and silly – like me." Jacqueline describes their friendship as "easy" that is before a certain reality show came into their lives…
- On RHONJ and all the fights: "We're tough bitches."
- On First Impression Of Caroline: "She was great! We had a really good time together," says Jacqueline
through her drunken memories.Jacqueline admits they once had a fight when Caroline said something she was "insulted" by and she was in a bout of post-partum depression. "There was a punch thrown…"
- Favorite RHONJ Moment: "I had a lot of fun with Teresa. We had a lot of silly moments. When we went to Italy, we had a lot of fun on that trip." Awwww
- When Things Fell Apart With Teresa: When Teresa started having family dramas and was putting both true and untrue things in the tabloids. "I never knew what was true or what was not true. I was still, like, really concerned for her." Teresa believes Jacqueline was questioning her about the tabloids to be "relevant for the show."
"She brought it as her storyline," Jacqueline says. "Because she made it so public, we all had to respond to it." That was the first fight the friends had ever had. Teresa says their falling out hurt her and it she felt like she went through a "friends divorce."
- On Juicy's C-U-N-T Phone Call: "I felt hurt, I felt sad. I reached out to her after that. I sent her a text – I feel really bad that that had to be so public."
- On Teresa's Guilt At The Posche Fashion Show: "I knew she had an involvement. I just didn't know to what extent. I believe she knew a lot of what was gonna happen."
- On What To Expect This Season: "We really reached deep. Everybody. It took us to the core."
Melissa was pretty relaxed and I thought came across honestly. I hope she and Teresa can truly let things go and move on. They don't have to be BFF, but they do have to work together and also be a family.
- On Caroline: "Caroline was a little standoffish. She has admitted that she doesn't like you before she likes you. But she instantly loved Joe [Gorga]."
- On Meeting Teresa: "The first time I met her was at my mother-in-law's house." She was "Very talkative. She was nice to me. She wanted to know a lot; she was asking a lot of questions."
- Favorite RHONJ Moment: Predictably it was all about her. The time she fell in the water during their road trip to CA. ME-lissa!
- On The Christening: Melissa admits it did not turn out how she expected. OH! Really?! "I'm glad that we were able to move on from it. There's a lot of good memories I have and a lot of beautiful pictures I have. So it wasn't a complete flop." Dang – girl has some loooow standards! Must be all those years hanging out with Teresa and Poison!
- On Things Falling Apart With Teresa: "It was way before the Real Housewives of New Jersey. Teresa's Teresa! There was always a little bit of a rudeness sometimes. Like, she would say things and I would be like 'Hmmm… OK…'"
"I get arguing your point. Don't try to bring people down. 'Lemme ruin any opportunity for you to move up, because I don't want that for you…' I don't like that."
- On Christmas Cookie-Gate (Melissa's Version): "I went to the Italian market… and I saw sprinkle cookies and I wanted sprinkle cookies! I didn't get them from ShopRite! Who cares where I got them from?! It was a beautiful thing of sprinkle cookies!" Melissa says she was six-months pregnant and was "dying" for them (Hey – I get it, sister! I would have killed for chocolate covered Oreos!). And when she handed them over to Teresa she was like, uhhh… no.
- On Who 'On Display' Was Really About: "Whatever makes you feel better. It's definitely 100% not [about Teresa]. That is my song. I wrote that when I was filming – I was thinking that's what life was gonna be like… "
- On Juicy's C-U-N-T Phone Call: "I started crying. Honestly. I was upset watching it… for her." On Juicy allegedly cheating: "I won't talk about that. That's between them. Marriage is a line I won't cross."
- On Teresa's Guilt At The Posche Fashion Show: "I don't think it was one person, I think it was a group of people. I think it was the people who own the salon and I think Teresa knew about it. I think everyone played a part."
- On The Brawls This Season: "It's a different level of hurt. It's a different level of pain. And when it comes into your marriage and it comes into something that can honestly hurt your family or your children, your mind thinks in a different way and you react."
- On Where They Go From Here: "I can control what I can forgive and what I can forget. Especially when it's family. It's actually pretty amazing."
Overall, this show – whether you want to admit it or not – has become all about Teresa. She is like the nuclear bomb explosion for which RHONJ rotates. I'm excited about the season, I hate to admit it, and I'm excited to see these ladies work to put the past behind them. Healing is a process – and hopefully they're committed!
And let us end with a little RHONJ Word Association. First word that comes to mind when you think Jersey… GO!
[Photo Credits: Twitter & Disney]
TELL US – WHAT DID YOU THINK OF THE WWHL SPECIAL? ARE YOU EXCITED ABOUT THE SEASON?