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brandi scheana

I can hear my mom's words of wisdom echoing in my ears…"If he'll cheat with you, he'll cheat on you!"  Granted, I've never cheated with–or on–anyone (but, well, there was high school.  Does that count?), but it's advice that totally translates into the grown-up world.  However, can we technically call LeAnn Rimes an adult?  She's constantly tearlessly crying in interviews about never having the opportunity to be a child, so perhaps she's regressed.  Regardless, Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star Brandi Glanville is likely smug upon hearing this latest gossip.

A quick breakdown (as if y'all need it): Brandi's husband Eddie Cibrian cheated on her with SUR waitress Scheana Marie Jancan (that is no one's given name!).  When Eddie then cheated with LeAnn, Scheana went to the press to complain about how heartbroken she was when her affair ended because Eddie found another mistress.  High five, Brandi!  You came out on top of this cluster for sure! 

I don't know about you, but I find it very fishy that this news is coming to light way after it acutally happened.  Funny how Bravo is trying to promote Lisa Vanderpump's (love her!) new show Vanderpump Rules on which Scheana plays a bullied, overly sexed, wannabe pop star waitress…It's what publicity stunts are made of, right?

Gracious though, when you read Sheana's interview, which occurred after her sit-down with Brandi, you'll shake your head and wonder if she has a publicist.  Sheana is still taking shots at Brandi while playing the victim.  Um, I'm sorry.  I don't care how horrid the woman was whose husband you were bedding, you're still the other woman.  She can call you names, and she can be mean to you.  You slept with her husband!  I'm speaking to Scheana in first person because she strikes me as the type of fame hungry girl that will read every blog written about her.  Scheana, I'm not hating, I'm just trying to give you some sincere feedback.  Oh, and by the way, NEVER record that breathy porn song you sang on Vanderpump Rules.  The world, and iTunes, sends their thanks.

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kenya-moore

Really? Really? I think I just had a horrible nightmare. Oh it was so bad. There were tone-deaf desperate middle aged women twirling around in too tight clothes, screaming about their butts and security and sperm donors and Gone With The Wind. They were looking for a broken pageant crown. And worst of all… THEY WERE SINGING! They swore people thought they were Beyoncé. More like Beyon-fake. 

Then I woke up and realized I was just watching Watch What Happens Live where it was announced that Kenya Moore is releasing a song  based on the catchphrase she thinks is going to happen. Yes, below you can listen to the Gone With The Wind Fabulous audio. It sounds like an 80's workout video and the Real Housewives of Atlanta star was erroneously mislead into believing her "rap" is cute. 

CLICK CONTINUE READING FOR THE SONG! 

mtv-buckwild-breakout-star-shain-gandee-candy

Shain Gandee is most definitely the breakout star of BUCKWILDMTV describes Shain as "a trash collector … and quite possibly inebriated at any given moment, refers to himself as Gandee Candy, and every time he speaks, you need subtitles to understand him. Needless to say, he's amazing." 

Yes, Shain is amazing in a tire rollin', muddin' kind of way, but apparently he's no longer a trash collector. Rumor has it that Shain lost his sanitation job well before BUCKWILD began filming last spring. According to the Charleston Daily Mail, Shain was let go in November 2011 for "violating the personnel policy."

Color me confused because Shain is seen throwing trash bags into a South Charleston trash truck on the BUCKWILD series premiere. Why the lie?

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X Factor USA finals Press Confrence at held at CBS Studios

It sounds like there are two empty seats at The X Factor's judges' table now. Last month, L.A. Reid announced he has no interest in season three of The X Factor, and now Britney Spears has also walked away from the show. 

According to TMZ, Britney is leaving The X Factor to focus on her music. Britney is currently working on a new album with Will.i.amJay-Z, and Kanye West's producer Hit-Boy. It sounds like she hopes to go on tour, as well, once the album is finished. 

TMZ's source says, "Britney loves Simon Cowell, she likes Demi Lovato but her thing is music." 

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top-chef-seattle-restaurant-wars-part-one-tom-colicchio-danny-meyer-padma-lakshmi-gail-simmons

Last week on Top Chef, Micah Fields won the sexy knife quickfire challenge and Kristen Kish won the memorable moments elimination challenge. In a cook-off with Lizzie BinderJohn Tesar (and his eye glasses) fell victim to the curse of the risotto and was eliminated. Ouch! Being eliminated over Lizzie, who knowingly cooked and served questionable scallops, had to be embarrassing. 

While Josh Valentine (and his twisty mustache) is glad John is gone, Stefan Richter (and his wrinkle-free face) misses his "morning friend." Josie Malave declares she didn't come back as a stupid chef. True. She came back as an annoying chef.

Padma Lakshmi and Wolfgang Puck introduce the quickfire challenge.
 
Quickfire Challenge
 
The challenge: create a dish highlighting ginger… sponsored by Canada Dry Ginger Ale… in only fifteen minutes. Ginger Ale. It's what pays the bills. 
 
15 minutes? Wolfgang Puck? The pressure is on! Lizzie makes a split-second decision and grabs watermelon. Brooke loves ginger and pairs it with squid. Stefan disses Sheldon's stir fry dish, calling it too pedestrian and Chinese restaurant, and Sheldon yells "mother f-ker" at his meat.
 
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lilly-ghalichi-jennifer-stano

Lilly Ghalichi has been, ummm… interesting, shall we say. And apparently she has a doublemint twin of her own who she slings Have Faith Swimgerie with. Seriously.

Lilly's BFF and business partner Jennifer Stano is dishing on why she isn't making an appearance on Shahs of Sunset and gives a little insider dirt on the world of competing reality shows. Maybe they need to start doing their own Olympics.

Jennifer was recently featured on the extremely highbrow TLC show "Secrets Of A Trophy Wife," because guess what – she is one! Go figure. I'm so sad I missed that riveting experience of watching this. #sarcasm.

Let's digest Jennifer's story as told on her personal blog below.

"Many of you have been asking me if they will be seeing me on Shahs with Lilly and if Lilly will be on the TLC special Trophy Wife. The answer is unfortunately no, and heres why. At the beginning of the year I was interviewed for Housewives of Beverly Hills [Real Housewives of Beverly Hills], made it to the network but was told I was too young for the already established cast, and I completely agree." I think "too young" was a nice way of saying too ridiculous and vapid. Just me? And because they knew classy Lisa Vanderpump and Yolanda Foster wouldn't touch her cheap weave and bad implants with a ten foot stemmed champagne glass. She seems like a better fit for RHONJ anyway!

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kim kanye

Y'all realize that, no matter what, the Kardashians aren't going anywhere any time soon.  That said, don't shoot the messenger!  Actually, today's Kardashian trash is at least humorous enough to provide some sort of entertainment.

Here's a quick breakdown:  Kim Kardashian doesn't want to still be married to Kris Humphries when she gives birth (but there is quite a catch!), and Kim and Kanye West maintain that Kimye, Jr. will not be a part of E!'s fall line-up.  Again, I'll believe that when I see it!  Finally, the young Kendall Jenner doesn't want to follow in her family's famewhoring footsteps.  Sure. 

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