Thank you, Lifetime! My prayers have been answered. Last night’sDance Moms episode was only an hour long. Finally! I never thought this day would come! We are back to some semblance of structure. Abby Lee Miller is actually present for the pyramid! If that’s not enough, Jill Vertes gets to throw out her favorite word–favoritism–regarding the minis. It’s status quo once again!
In case you missed the first fifteen hours of this season, Jill is sick and tired of the mini team taking Abby’s attention away from Kendall and the elite team. However, she’s the loudest to cheer when Abby announces yet again that the minis’ latest group routine garnered the most points. In fact, it’s Holly Frazier who is first to challenge Abby regarding the drama surrounding last week’s competition. Kira happily joins in and Jill quickly stops cheering and starts chastising. Stacey, the only mini mom whose name I’ve chosen to learn, is very vocal about how horrible the veteran moms are. Lather, rinse, repeat, week after week, season after season.
Even though there is always drama happening between Abby Lee Miller and the mothers on Dance Moms, there is a lot more craziness going on behind the scenes with Abby’s legal troubles. This fraud case seems like it will never end. I am curious about the way it’s going to end up. Will Abby end up with jail time? We won’t be getting an answer anytime soon since Abby’s sentencing has been pushed to 2017.
I feel like this case has been going on forever and I have absolutely no involvement, so I can’t imagine how Abby is feeling. And weirdly enough, it’s not even Abby and her legal team who pushed for the sentencing to be later than originally planned.
Sheesh! Drama much? What a silly question. After all, we’re talking about Abby Lee Miller and Dance Moms! Last night was certainly no picnic in the park (ahem) amid the studio owner’s mounting legal issues. Abby’s bankruptcy is once again in the news, and she’s favoring the minis, so you can imagine how well that goes over with Jill and her cackling hens. But hey, we’re spared the monotony of a pyramid, so that’s a silver lining, right?
Last night’s episode begins with the mothers speculating about Abby’s bankruptcy woes and what it could mean for their daughters’ careers. On cue, Abby comes dramatically sweeping into the studio. Refusing to acknowledge anyone, she quickly locks herself in her office. She doesn’t have time for such frivolous activities as teaching her students. Can you blame her? And, as I just said, there is no pyramid to endure. There is also no sign of Jessalyn and JoJo Siwa. Jill reveals she’s tried calling several times with no response.
I’m not going to bend your ears anymore complaining about why in the name of all that is decent Lifetime has decided that ninety minutes is the new norm when it comes to this season’s Dance Moms episodes. I guess the network just doesn’t have any reality stars that are as riveting as Abby Lee Miller and her band of dancers. I should be used to it by now, and it will be a special treat if I ever check the Lifetime schedule and see a show only spanning an hour. Silver linings! Of course, the veteran moms are still feuding with the mini mothers.
The episode begins with a heart wrenching announcement from Kira. A friend of Kalani Hilliker’s from the Arizona dance community has committed suicide. She has spoken with Abby and hopes the difficult topic will be addressed with the team. After last week’s solo bomb, it’s no surprise that Abby isn’t in the greatest mood for this week’s pyramid. Since they didn’t compete, the minis are spared the pyramid and sent to work with a guest choreographer. Abby vows to make more time for them this week, as she hopes she’ll find a mini-Maddie in the bunch.
Have we decided who is collectively more miserable? Is it the veteran Dance Moms or the mini mother planning their tiny coup? Perhaps we just call it even and declare Abby Lee Miller the nastiest participant in this crazy reality show? Anyone? Over/under? Perhaps the truest evil genius is Lifetime for continuing to subject us to these super-sized episodes.
Jill is now more focused on Kendall’s music as that’s what making waves for her daughter’s teammate Nia Frazier. She feigns excitement for JoJo Siwa’s latest music video, reminding Kendall that her album is what is most important. Jill has gone so far as to dissolve Abby’s role as Kendall’s manager, and she is bracing for Abby’s wrath as a result of that decision. Before pyramid, Jill warns the other mothers that Abby may be in rare form due to her lawyer’s letter to Abby firing her. This should be fun.
Is ninety-minutes of Dance Moms really necessary, Lifetime? How much footage could you possibly have? The season is already going to be at least a hundred episodes long, so do we need to be subjected to super-sized episodes each week? Oh well. More air time for Abby Lee Miller at least!
As last night’s episode begins, the mini moms are excited to enter a quiet studio. However, they are quickly bombarded by the veteran mothers who tease them about fighting over a plastic crown during last week’s episode. Jill condescendingly compliments the mini team as “cute.” After some strong duets, the veteran moms are feeling confident in the pyramid. Of course, they are confused when they see so many pictures as part of the weekly round up. Are the minis part of the pyramid as well? Say it isn’t so!
Kalani Hilliker celebrated her Sweet 16 with an over-the-top party deserving of its own MTV show, then Abby Lee Miller celebrated a birthday of an unknown quantity which was a decidedly lower key affair save for the enormous cake.
Kalani’s birthday party took place in an LA bowling alley and was attended by plenty of ALDC dancers – and the big gift was a white Range Rover. Then it was back home to AZ to celebrate with a visit from Maddie Ziegler (who also has a birthday coming up).
With the Dance Moms finally (FINALLY!) getting along and forming an alliance in the wake of Abby Lee Miller’s indifference for the elite team, Lifetime had to do something to stir up some additional drama. Enter the mini team with mothers who may be even battier and more hungry for fame than the veteran ladies. Last night, the little rump shakers came back with a vengeance, and their daughters were right there with them! 😉 I guess this means I have to make an effort to learn the mini moms’ names. Bear with me.
As the episode begins, Jill passive aggressively greets her her mini mother counterparts. “Oh, isn’t she the cutest?” while staring darts at a six-year-old…you know the drill! The veteran moms explain the recent antics surrounding Abby’s behavior, and Holly is hopeful that this week Abby will be able to balance giving the proper attention and direction to both teams. That wish is quickly dashed as Abby hobbles into a studio using a walker. She has recently had knee surgery, and while she’s in a lot of pain, she’s excited about the painkillers she’s been prescribed. This should be fun! At pyramid, Nia is present but sick with strep throat. How miserable! Before she reveals the order of the pyramid, Abby introduces Lilly and her mother Stacey. Stacey is a psychologist whose daughter has wanted to be an ALDC member since she was a newborn. Hmmmm. Does someone need a bit of self-reflection? Holly demands an apology for flipping the bird, and she takes it as a good sign when Abby concedes.