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Kristen

I have been watching Vanderpump Rules since the beginning and I can’t believe that I’m at a point where I am waiting for Kristen Doute to come on screen. She has done some questionable things (I won’t recap, but if you are dedicated, you are in the know), but she has moved past that and owned it all. She is the most fun person in the cast and she is the most honest. Love her or hate her, at least she’s speaking truth instead of trying to control image… like some of the other cast members reaching for a story line.

Unfortunately, Kristen‘s truth includes dating James Kennedy, who may or may not have used her to get a spot on this show. She started out the show dating Tom Sandoval, which seems like a lifetime ago…until Kristen shades him or calls him out for something during that time period. Now Kristen is in a stable relationship with Brian Carter, and it seems like Crazy Kristen is no more.

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Kristen opened up about all three of her already-public relationships during an interview with Annabelle Desisto on her Adderall and Compliments podcast. First off, you actually need to listen to the whole podcast because they discuss their lives and other reality shows and it’s hilarious, but I am just gonna highlight the juiciest tidbits.

Kristen and Annabelle discussed Bravo super fan Chrissy Teigen which led to a discussion about James. Kristen declared, “She’s just awesome. The fact that she’s a fan of James Kennedy though is the part that ruins it for me even though it’s just all in good fun of television. She gave him the mazel and the jackhole of the year on Watch What Happens Live.” I actually thought that was hilarious, but Kristen feels, “It just gives him so much attention.” And it’s not like he is in dire need of a self-esteem boost.

Kristen and Annabelle discussed the etiquette for taking back gifts after a breakup. Personally, I didn’t think this was even a thing, unless the “gift” was an engagement ring, but apparently it is. Kristen admitted, “I have in fact asked for gifts back before and that’s because I was a scorned woman when Tom number two (I laughed out loud at her referring to him by this moniker) broke up with me many, many years ago. I was really pissed off because he kicked me out of our apartment and I was like ‘Hey go fuck yourself. You took the silverware and the light bulbs, I want the guitar back that I bought you that I couldn’t afford to purchase myself and I want the iPad that I bought you that I don’t even have one at this point because I’m a really nice girlfriend.'” How could Tom “steal” light bulbs if he just remained in the apartment that he shared? Was she planning to unscrew the light bulbs or something?

Kristen recalled, “I did request for those things back and he looked at me- as he should have- and was like ‘Those are presents you bought be a really long time ago. You want them back as like collateral or something? I don’t get it.’ I did not get those said gifts back, but I did erase the iPad and that felt good enough for me.” At least Kristen could admit that she was wrong… up until that part about erasing the iPad, but it could have been much worse during the Crazy Kristen era. Tom got it easy.

Annabelle complimented Kristen for being a very generous friend- a side of Kristen, that doesn’t get much time on the show. Kristen explained, “Ariana’s [Ariana Madix] braid and Tom’s braids mean more than showing that we are actually good people.”

The conversation moved to Adult Friend Finder users. First of all, I had no idea what that even was so I wasn’t really following. This was until I paused the podcast for a Google search after Kristen admitted, “I know what Adult Friend Finder is because my ex boyfriend was on Friend Finder and I hacked into that shit too.” Annabelle asked her to name the ex and Kristen said, “Tom Sandoval. Totally calling it out too. Don’t Care. How I realized he was on it was through a separate email address. I ninety nine percent don’t think anything came of it, but I definitely caught him chatting people up.” I don’t know what’s weirder about that whole statement, the fact that Tom was (allegedly) a member on this site or the extent of Kristen’s investigation. The woman is THOROUGH.

Not only is Kristen a thorough boyfriend investigator, but she is so open about it so I can’t help wondering how Carter feels. Annabelle asked Kristen if she’s ever broken into Carter’s phone and surprisingly she said, “No I have not.” Apparently he does give her access to his phone since she also said, “I don’t know his social media passwords, but I wouldn’t need them being on his phone. I’m not worried about it. We live together.” She also lived with Sandoval…

Speaking of which, Kristen said, “There were definitely times within our long relationship that I did go through his phone and didn’t find anything, but it made me act differently because I had guilt.” Once again, that Sandoval relationship seems like it happened a lifetime ago. Things seem different with Carter though since Kristen revealed, “He knows my passwords. I don’t care.” Oh Kristen.

Speaking of social media issues, Kristen revealed, “I have self-esteem issues because I am the least-followed person on Instagram on Vanderpump Rules. I mean other than the people that don’t matter, but on the primary cast. Brittany [Cartwright] is only twenty or thirty thousand people behind me and I’ve been on the show three years longer than she has.” I follow you, Kristen! Judge me, readers. I don’t care.

This is a little off topic from the boyfriends topic, but she revealed that Jax Taylor fronted the payment for her puppy that she bought when she was wasted and I love her for this. Kristen recalled, “Jax and Brittany were getting a puppy and the neighbor brought over the two boys left in the litter because the girls were all gone. She was like ‘This was an unexpected litter. I can’t have any more dogs.’ and Brittany and Jax they were looking at these two dogs. I was really drunk- again- and I’m like ‘Oh my god. I want this one. Jax, do you have your checkbook? I’ll Venmo you’ and that was the story of Gibson.” Usually when I’m drunk I buy pizza or some Taco Bell. Clearly, I need to step up my game.

I can also relate to Kristen’s Southern Charm fandom. She admitted, “I have now watched all of them.” Not only that, but she also gets to be friends with them. She said, ” I’ve hung out with Naomi [Olindo], Craig [Conover], and Dani [Baird] and I love them.” And she added, ” I met Whitney [Sudler Smith] once- I’ll leave it at that. He’s a very talented musician. We text once in a while.” What did that mean- the “I’ll leave it at that” part? If Kristen has a good story about Whitney, we would love to hear it.

In another random reality TV crossover, Kristen discussed former Dance Moms lead Abby Lee Miller. She recalled, “I actually waited on her one time and she was not kind to me. She was very dismissive. Don’t dismiss me unless you’re a Kardashian and I don’t think that Khloe [Kardashian] would never dismiss me. I don’t know if I’d ever get close enough to her to have her dismiss me.” I wonder if Khloe watches Vanderpump Rules.

Tonight is part 2 of the Vanderpump Rules reunion. We hope it’s as fun and dishy as part one! Tune in and join us in the comments to pick it all apart!

TELL US- DO YOU THINK CRAZY KRISTEN IS GONE FOREVER? DO YOU MISS SEEING CRAZY KRISTEN ON THE SHOW?

[Photo Credit: Bravo]