I almost have no words for the dysfunction of last night’s Vanderpump Rules. Maybe Stassi Schroeder is aging in reverse. Not in that ‘she looks fabulous way’ of Lisa Vanderpump, but of the OMG – is she really throwing a toddler temper tantrum at her own birthday party. I think I read a Berenstain Bears book about that called “Too Much Birthday.”
Could Stassi and Ariana Madix buy a 2-for-1 therapy session on Groupon? Or maybe Jax Taylor‘s reiki healer can mend the hole in Stassi’s forehead by using her calming touch to transforms it into a halo of happiness. Is that medically possible? Jax and Stassi can skip off into the sunset together happy, at peace, alive! Kristen Doute would lose her soulmate.
There is just so much reality TV action to keep up with, from the shows themselves, to the latest headlines in between seasons, and then there are all of the social media posts. No need to worry about keeping up with the Instagram posts though. This week’s Instagram Roundup has you covered with all of the best, weirdest, and most interesting reality TV star photos from the week.
This season on Vanderpump Rules, we’ve been introduced to newcomer Billie Lee. We first met Billie during the Pride episode and heard her share the story of her transition. We’ll be seeing more of her this season and she is dishing on the cast members: who has been the most welcoming, who she’s not getting along with (one guess!) and what we can expect in the upcoming episodes.
Billie sat down with Page Six to reveal that she didn’t know any of the cast members before she landed the job at SUR and she was working at the restaurant for a few months before producers approached her about filming. So far, Jax Taylor has been terrific and Ariana Madix, too, but she’s not besties with Stassi Schroeder just yet. Shocker, right?
Sometimes it’s not all diamonds and rose in Lisa Vanderpump‘s world. Sometimes the fancy parties held in her honor end in tears and the fancy restaurants she owns go up in smoke. Such was the case on last night’s Vanderpump Rules.
Lisa is now the Editor In Chief of Beverly Hills Lifestyle Magazine, which I’d always assumed was one of those free magazines, but because this is Beverly Hills that free magazine still is behooving of the fancy of Beverly Hills. Apparently it’s a thing people pay money for, which means Lisa wants a fancy party to celebrate her new position there. Makes sense. What does not make sense is that Lisa puts Stassi Schroeder in charge of said party. Predictably it’s a disaster.
It’s almost like Vanderpump Rules is a sociological experiment on modern love, right? Every other day there are new cheaters to eclipse the previous cheaters with crazier cheating scandals and bigger liars, all compounded by the ever-shifting relationships around accommodating these facts. Can’t anyone get in the right pants? Or keep their members in the right pants, rather?
Take for instance the evolution of Jax Taylor and James Kennedy. They’ve both ‘interacted’ with the same women (Kristen Doute and Lala Kent), which created a palpable neanderthal assholian hatred towards each other – like crabs in a bucket – as they battled over being too similar, but now they’re bonding over how much they cannot stand Kristen. Which is hilarious considering neither one of them ever seemed to like Kristen to begin with! And now, of course, Kristen is trying to destroy Jax’s relationship with Brittany Cartwright. Not because Kristen likes Jax (or has any lingering feelings for him), but because she loves Brittany (and once hooked up with her) too much to let her be ruined by Jax.
Tom Sandoval and Ariana Madix, the couple that never fights (on camera, at least), ended up engaging in a screaming match on camera after Ariana showed Brittany the audio that Faith recorded during her hookup with Jax. Tom couldn’t believe that she did this at Brittany’s housewarming party when she (and everyone else) was wasted and Ariana avidly defended her decision.
It is so difficult keeping track of the friendships on Vanderpump Rules. No matter what happens or what they say about each other, you never know where these people stand with each other on any given day. These cast members have to be the most forgiving people on the planet.
Kristen Doute never got along with Ariana Madix or Lala Kent in the past, but now she’s cool with both of them. Ariana started dating Kristen’s ex boyfriend and Kristen invited a girl that he allegedly hooked up with all the way from Miami to show up at SUR in Los Angeles and now these two are getting along after years of shading each other. Kristen and Lala never had a chance at friendship thanks to everyone else’s drama. Now, Kristen is on good terms with them and she opened up about that in a recent interview.
There is nothing worse than a professional reality star. You know what I’m talking about, because nearly every person on Vanderpump Rules now occupies that position. They fakely (yes I know that’s a fake word) work at SUR, they’re fakely are friends with each other, and they fakely pretend to care about causing drama in each other’s lives.
To point: last night’s episode was an amazing pile-up of so many [mostly fake] car crashes, I don’t even know where to begin, middle, and end.