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Lisa Vanderpump and Kyle Richards

Lisa Vanderpump and Kyle Richards could do little but stare, mouths agape, at the insanity that went down in Hong Kong on this week’s Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills. Now that she’s had time to process the situation, Lisa has a lot to say. Praising Dorit Kemsley for holding her own and slamming Lisa Rinna for being the messiest broad alive her vitriolic accusations, Lisa doesn’t hold back in her blog!

Lisa begins with gratitude for her cast mates supporting her work against Yulin. “Hong Kong was an incredible opportunity to focus on our fight against Yulin, and I am grateful for all who supported us in our tireless endeavors, against the barbarianism which transpires each summer solstice.”

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Moving on to the multiple fights aboard the junk boatLisa reflects, “On the boat, Kyle and I watched as Dorit did an excellent job at defending herself, relentlessly pushing forward under the barrage of remarks coming from LR, EJ and ED. Every time I tried to diffuse the situation, those two would not have it. They are tethered together by a loyalty that sometimes makes no sense…I believe sometimes a true friend can tell you when to shut up and not support you flipping the bird and screaming abuse.”

Lisa thinks Erika Girardi is a tough nut to crack. She explains, “I felt a modicum of responsibility for all of them, as they were there at my invitation, and I didn’t want to see it all end in tears. Erika has never made an effort with me since the beginning when I had welcomed her to our group. All I had heard was negativity last year. Things have improved this year, and I am hopeful for what lies ahead, but I am not an idiot. Or if I am, I am a busy idiot with not much energy left to push for something that is one sided.”

After a their Buddha excursion, Lisa says she “was hopeful for a tranquil dinner after the night before, but the tension was palpable, and now I view this as LR salaciously asks Dorit if she apologized to Erika. It was sickening.”

But why is pantygate – or “knickergate” as LVP calls it – still an issue? Lisa doesn’t understand Erika’s hypocritical stance on social decorum and modesty. “The importance of knickergate was still mystifying to me. This is a woman who is brazen in her performances, wears c—y around her neck, is often stark naked unnecessarily in front of millions. I never thought it was intentional, so none of it made sense to me, and I wish she could understand that Dorit’s intention was to bring levity to the situation. LR was aggressively relentless in her pursuit of Dorit. When she said she was done, I knew it wasn’t the end of it.”

As for Eileen Davidson’s foot-in-mouth statement about children, Lisa (along with just about everyone else) agrees that Eileen meant no harm. “Erika reacting to an innocuous statement by Eileen, who we see was attempting to placate the situation, was a bizarre moment. I was thankful to Eileen for attempting to put this whole ridiculous situation into perspective. It was a statement that inadvertently referred to Erika’s son’s job, and I found myself defending Eileen in that moment. She was truly mortified, and that might just indicate the radical twists and turns that ensued that night.”

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“I imagine as a mother how stressful it must be as your child is in the field and there must be many sleepless nights, but that was an extreme reaction which no one understood. Dorit did an excellent job at defending herself, and she has proven to be a worthy opponent when the gloves are off.”

Finally, Lisa moves on to Rinna’s incendiary accusations about Dorit and her guests “doing coke in the bathroom” at her dinner party. Bottom line: Lisa thinks Rinna is a pile o’ sh*t. Well, in so many words…

“I can’t comprehend the vitriol that spewed from LR’s mouth, and I had no inkling that slanderous accusations would be hurled at Dorit. Things went from bad to worse…” blogs Lisa. “It was unfair, unnecessary and also unwarranted. Did she trust her husband? WTF has that got to do with anything that had transpired so far? Dorit wasn’t threatened by Erika as LR alleged…And then…Cocaine allegations? I have been the recipient of nasty, vitriolic, unsubstantiated claims, and I defended  my friend Dorit, whom I know to be a decent young woman that was aghast at the venomous words that might linger as the forum is so public.”

Lisa describes her feelings as she watched the episode air this week: “Watching this actually sickened me. LR looked as if she revelled in Dorit’s  exasperation. It was reminiscent of last year. When I exclaimed that it was a low blow, LR stated I was the queen of low blows. I resent that as I would never unjustly accuse someone of something so egregious, especially out of retaliation.”

Leaving us with final words of wisdom on fake friendships, Lisa closes by warning, “Always remember, when you are aggressively pursued and somebody is clearly attempting to sully your reputation, denigrate your character…don’t panic. Give as much credibility to their statement as they deserve, which in this case is zero. And always consider the source, and I think then we will have a better understanding of the validity of those statements. I think this year has given me clarity it as to what transpired last year.”

TELL US: DID DORIT DEFEND HERSELF WELL IN HONG KONG? DO YOU AGREE THAT RINNA HAS TAKEN HER BEHAVIOR TO A NEW LOW? 

Photo Credit: Bravo

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