Brittany Cartwright first showed up on Vanderpump Rules as a just another in a long, long line of Jax Taylor’s
conquests love interests. She drove from Kentucky to California, her car stuffed to the brim with crop tops, beer cheese, and dogs the approximate size of small rats to join the staff at SUR. Brittany is kind of like the epitome of a modern day fairy tale – from Hooters waitress to reality tv persona!
Personally, I didn’t expect Brittany to last as many seasons as she has. Mostly because Jax is gross and can’t keep it in his pants. And he kind of seems like a jerk. I thought she’d high-tail it back down South and immediately marry a good ole’ Kentucky boy, and they would ride off together on the back of his John Deere to make gorgeous, unintelligible babies together. Honestly, have you ever heard a little kid with a thick Southern accent? It’s like listening to a baby Martian. Super cute, but I have no idea what they are saying.
But Brittany proved me wrong and stuck around to become one of the most universally-liked members of the cast. She is so well liked that, at the launch of her boot collection, titled “The Babe of Boot Season: Brittany Cartwright x ShoeDazzle,” Brittany told Us Weekly that she is the “peacemaker” of the cast. She explained that she makes a good mediator because “it takes a lot to, like, aggravate [her].”
I guess her laid-back nature also explains how she can put up with Jax and his various shenanigans? I mean, I know I’d need a steady Xanax drip to put up with his beer-cheese covered baloney.
Speaking of Jax, Brittany also told Us Weekly that she is currently helping him learn to think before he speaks. Jax is apparently learning to “take a step away, breathe for a second, and figure it out whenever he cools down.”
You know who else is working on the art of cooling off before lashing out? My toddler. I wonder if Jax gets a sticker on his chart for every time he calms himself down and uses his words instead of his hands? Dear Andy Cohen, please let this be the only thing my child ever has in common with Jax Taylor. Amen.
RELATED: Brittany Cartwright, Ariana Madix, And Kristen Doute Comment On Jax Taylor’s Feuds With His Vanderpump Rules Costars
Maybe the social media “unfollow” is the millennial version of “just walk away from your brother if he’s harassing you?” Because it appears that Jax has recently unfollowed several cast-mates, potentially due to some sort of Lance-Bass-related feud. Poor Lance, if Brittany is a modern fairy tale, Lance is, like, whatever the opposite of a fairy tale is. From member of one of the most popular music sensations of the ’90’s to the subject of a feud between someone with the social skills of a toddler and Kristen Doute. So, I guess, I should say “to the subject of a feud between two people with the social skills of a toddler.”
Also, LOL at Jax being a millennial. He’s 40! Well, most of him is. His nose is much younger.
RELATED: Brittany Cartwright Defends Lala Kent After Randall Emmett’s Ex Criticized Her For Posting Photos Of Her Kids
Anyway, y’all, I’ll let you know how it goes when my Brittany Cartwright x ShoeDazzle Saylor Knee High Boots are delivered in 7-10 business days.
TELL US – DO YOU THINK OF BRITTANY AS A PEACEMAKER? DO YOU THINK JAX WILL REALLY LEARN TO COOL DOWN AND THINK BEFORE HE REACTS?
[Photo Credit: Charles Sykes/Bravo]