How much trouble can one pint-sized charter guest cause on Below Deck? If her name is Delores, it turns out the answer is, well, quite a lot. So much, in fact, that this episode is super-sized! In the immediate aftermath of last week’s nighttime swim, Captain Lee Rosbach is fuming. Like, he’s so angry that you can practically see steam coming out of his ears. Delores is finally out of the water, wrapped up in a towel but still not sorry for disobeying his direct orders. As far as Cap is concerned the charter is over, and they’ll be heading back to the dock in the morning.
In the meantime, they have to get through the night without Delores deciding to go for another dip in the dark ocean. So Lee asks the crew to take turns playing prison guard. Which means standing in front of her cabin door all night in shifts. Naturally, this affects the entire crew and no one is particularly happy about getting their night’s sleep ruined. When Chef Rachel Hargrove finds out what’s happened up on deck, she labels Delores’ behavior “DILLIGAF.” (This stands for “Does it look like I give a f–k?” and…accurate.)
The only people not particularly upset are James Hough and Elizabeth Frankini, who use Izzy Wouters‘ 2 a.m. watch to hook up in her cabin. Of course, it’s all fun and games until they lose track of time and…Izzy walks in on them an hour later. Still sick, poor Izzy just wants to go back to sleep. But now her cabin smells like a sweaty hostel. Which, it should be noted, is slightly different than smelling like hospital in the Bravoverse. So instead, she takes her pillows and goes to Elizabeth’s cabin. Only Elizabeth changes her mind and before she knows it, Izzy’s spending the night playing musical cabins and definitely not sleeping.
The next morning, Lee‘s still angry but has come up with a more clear-headed plan. The charter isn’t over. But Delores has to leave the boat. In the spirit of fairness, the other guests get to stay. Because they certainly weren’t the ones jumping overboard in the middle of the night. So there’s no need to punish them too. While the primaries sheepishly apologize to the captain, Francesca Rubi marches downstairs to get a still unapologetic Delores off the boat. After lecturing her on safety precautions one more time, she gives her 10 minutes to pack.
Now, if you were being literally escorted off a super yacht for bad behavior, you’d think you’d be a little forlorn. Right? Not our girl Delores! Second mate Mark is tasked with taking her ashore in the tender. And two minutes into the ride, she utters what will go down as one of the most iconic lines from a charter guest in Below Deck history: “It would be pretty ironic if I jumped in the water right now, wouldn’t it?” And then, yes, folks, Delores proceeds to dive off a moving tender back into the ocean.
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I mean, is she for real? Is she just acting up for the cameras at this point? Determined to go out with bang? I honestly couldn’t tell you, but the entire thing is equal parts hilarious and a giant headache. I mean, My Seanna is still literally within sight. The entire crew is on board gleefully watching Delores “DILLIGAF” her way back into the water while poor Mark — whose job is to generally stay off camera — is forced to swing the tender around and pluck her out of the ocean. Get it together, Delores. And…scene.
Meanwhile, everyone in the crew is exhausted from their night of prison duty. But especially Izzy. Francesca finds out about the cabin debacle from the night before and is furious at James and Elizabeth. The only reason she doesn’t go to Captain is because Eddie Lucas talks her down, convincing her the two of them can handle the issue as department heads. Which just foils Chess’s plan to get rid of Elizabeth, surely. The rest of the day goes fairly smoothly, though. The guests are now on their very best behavior, with Izzy taking them ashore for a horseback riding excursion and only one wing mirror getting busted off a jet ski when one guest (named Karen, natch) crashes it into the side of the swim platform.
That night, before Rachel‘s seafood extravaganza, Eddie and Francesca sit James and Elizabeth down for a scolding. It’s like being sent to the principal’s office. While Izzy and Ashling Lorger eavesdrop from above, the two department heads chide their underlings. There’s nothing wrong with a little boat-mance, but when it starts impacting other people in the crew, there will be problems. Got it? In the galley, Rachel randomly declares she’s decided she hates James. And Francesca still clearly hates Elizabeth, even jumping down her throat for resting her feet during dinner service…10 minutes after blatantly telling Elizabeth she could rest her feet. This is bound to end well.
The next morning is the last day of the charter, and Izzy wakes up even sicker. Her symptoms are suspiciously corona-like. But that would be impossible because at this point, there are no documented cases of the virus in Antigua. And also they’re on a boat in the middle of the Caribbean. So it’s probably just a case of being overworked. And, you know, lack of sleep. So either way, Izzy’s getting sent back to bed for the day. And is also being quarantined in a guest cabin the moment the charter ends. Which leaves Eddie to dock the yacht with just James and Rob Phillips, whose magnetic attraction is turning out to be the real, true boat-mance of the season.
After successfully docking with only three deck crew, the “boat people” finally leave and the chaotic charter is over. The tip is…middling at best. And randomly not an even number, clocking in at $16,790. So basically, Delores was supposed to contribute to the tip and thus managed to screw the crew over even more. But hey, at least it’s over. As a reward, Captain Lee announces the crew has the following day off. And he’s even organized for them to go ashore and spend the day at a fancy Antiguan beach club. Hooray!
With no charter to prep for, James takes Elizabeth on their first official date that night. While the pair are ashore for dinner, the rest of the crew plays drunk truth or dare. Which mostly involves Eddie imitating a goat and everyone offering terrible impressions of James’ British accent. Rachel‘s also ramping up her anti-James rhetoric in passing, and something tells me this might boil over into a full-blown feud. When they get back to the boat, the lovebirds avoid the rest of the crew. And can you blame them? Instead, they decide to sneak into one of the other guest cabins for the night. Without asking Francesca.
The next day is supposed to be filled with fun in the sun. Even Izzy is coming along, under strict orders to stay horizontal and not drink. However, Hurricane Hargrove quickly descends on the beach club, with Chef Rachel drunkenly out of order. When Rachel drinks, she’s aggressive and more than a little obnoxious. But it’s another level here. She’s stumbling around and screaming. And then drunkenly discovers the club’s house band. And a microphone! Which she sees as an invitation to get on stage and demand “some nasty ass music.”
Just as she’s ready to launch into “Walkin’ After Midnight” (“Google it,” she tells the very confused band), Francesca steps in to intervene. Rule number one in yachting under Captain Lee is clear: don’t embarrass yourself. Don’t embarrass the crew. At this point, a belligerent Rachel is very clearly doing both. And now she won’t get off stage, even with Chess’s stern prodding. It’s official: off-duty Rachel is a problem.
TELL US – ARE YOU SURPRISED DELORES JUMPED OFF THE BOAT AGAIN? DO YOU SHIP JAMES AND ELIZABETH? DID YOU FEEL BAD FOR IZZY’S MUSICAL CABINS SITUATION? IS RACHEL’S DRINKING BECOMING A LIABILITY?
[Photo Credit: Bravo]