For the past few seasons, it’s been tough for Vanderpump Rules viewers to sympathize with Katie Maloney. However, on tonight’s episode, her own husband, Tom Schwartz, really crosses a line. He talks down to her and humiliates her in front of the entire cast. And, oh yeah, the Vanderpump Rules viewers. Usually, the fans side with Schwartz just because he normally has such a lovable disposition. But, it will be very interesting to see how the Pump Rules fans feel after tonight’s episode. #TeamKatie on this one. This one time.
In other news, the cast gets together to celebrate Jax Taylor’s 40th birthday. Yeah, I know that we celebrate his birthday during every season of this show, but we also focused on his wedding for the first half of this current season. Can we get a break from the Jax-centered celebrations? Please. There are 13,000 other cast members on this show.
The drama between Vanderpump Rules’ Witches of WeHo has felt longer than Jax Taylor and Brittany Cartwright’s wedding. There were rumblings before the new season started that Katie Maloney and Stassi Schroeder were on the outs with Kristen Doute, but no one knew why. What could have been so upsetting that Stassi didn’t invite Kristen to her engagement party to Beau Clark?
Unless there is a new reveal later this season, the answer seems to be Kristen’s relationship with Brian Carter. The emotional toll of hearing about how he’s no good, yet Kristen continuing to stay with him, was enough for Stassi and Katie to say buh-bye. But Kristen is not going quietly. She recently accused Stassi of having nothing going on and dissed her podcast. Then, on last week’s episode, she went after Katie.
This whole Kristen Doute vs. Katie Maloney and Stassi Schroeder feud has been so vague and confusing. During last night’s episode of Vanderpump Rules, Katie claimed that Kristen took quotes from Pinterest for her t-shirt line.
And instead of clapping back at Katie, the person who made that remark, Kristen went in on Stassi’s career and current projects. And, the feud escalated to a full-on Twitter beef.
We celebrated Tom Sandoval‘s birthday on last night’s Vanderpump Rules and the theme was being extra. As if this group even has to try! Hey, at least it wasn’t more wedding nonsense.
Ugh – every time I reach a place where I kinda like Lala Kent, she goes and acts like a horrific ego-consuming monster whose such a bitch that I’m right back to wanting to smash cupcakes in her face. Super fattening, gluten-y, sugary cupcakes. Lala is a wench. A worse wench than Stassi Schroeder ever was in her Stasstrocious heyday. Lala is Jax Taylor bad. She’s also a dry drunk. Someone who has treated the symptom, not the disease. Lala reminds me of Kim Richards, formerly of Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills, now of never-to-be-published salacious memoir because Kyle Richards will tie your ass up in cord for ad infinitum. Which is also how long it will take Lala to realize that she’s a horrible human being who is still secretly in love with James Kennedy.
Anyway, these are my preliminary thoughts on last night’s Vanderpump Rules.
We are finally done with Jax Taylor and Brittany Cartwright’s wedding, way too many episodes later. Especially when there are thousands of cast members on Vanderpump Rules.
Jax Taylor and Brittany Cartwright got married in June 2019, but thanks to Vanderpump Rules, the wedding is still dragging out. Not only, did we have to watch multiple episodes of pre-wedding events, but the cast is still dishing on all of the drama.
Mainly, Jax has been at war with best man Tom Sandoval, who he kicked out of the wedding before he changed his mind and let him back in. Tom seemed to really come through that weekend. He had alcohol, toiletries, umbrellas, and even some tampons on hand just in case anyone had an emergency. Truthfully, he came across like the ideal best man, despite Jax giving him a low grade for his role. And Lala Kent agrees, which is not surprising since she’s been on the warpath against Tom and Ariana Madix recently.
We are officially halfway through this season of Vanderpump Rules, and so far it has been feuds galore. We’ve had Dayna Kathan feuding with Scheana Marie over Max Boyens. Then Scheana tried to feud with Charli Burnett over Brett Caprioni. Which lead to a feud between Brett and Scheana because he didn’t want to come over for her famous enchiladas. Don’t you ever change, girl.
Stassi Schroeder and Katie Maloney have banished Kristen Doute from their coven because of her on again off again relationship with Brian Carter. Lala Kent and James Kennedy made up, but James’ relationship with Raquel Leviss is hanging by a thread. Tom Sandoval almost got “Jaxed” from Jax Taylor and Brittany Cartwright’s wedding for saying their heads were in the sand about their pastor. So, is the rest of the season this tumultuous, or does Lance Bass step in and save the day for everyone?
Jax Taylor finally got married on last night’s Vanderpump Rules, metamorphosing from Jax to Jason. Even so Tom Sandoval was the true knight in shining armor. Tom had tampons, tissues, White Claw, vodka, an endless supply of giving and support. What did Jax have besides patchy sideburns and a mistaken understanding that getting married does not allow one legal ownership over your spouses breast implants.
Although how fantastic would it be if Brittany Cartwright threw the removed implants on the table at their inevitable divorce trial?! Which from the mid-season preview seems like it’s coming sooner rather than later. The shelf life of an implant is what – max, 10 years? The shelf life of a marriage to Jax Taylor has to be more like 2.2 years. Maybe 2.4 if there’s an extended separation. And probably more like 1.4 if Vanderpump Rules cameras turn off. Marriage Bootcamp only films for 5 weeks.
Anyhoodle, yes, Jax and Brittany finally finally finally made it down the aisle in the unrelenting sun of a Kentucky summer, leaving their guests to wilt and melt in 96 degree weather without any shade. Except for Tom 1 running around holding out parasols. Add that to his list of positives! After all this Jax only gives Tom 1 a B- or C in the best man performance grade.