Last night’s episode of Real Housewives Of Orange County was jam-packed, wasn’t it? It went from a literal brawl over Shane of all things, to laughing and crying, and in between people were dating, divorcing, apologizing, and maybe even dating people who are using them for their money! People were also getting their livers probed by an alien from planet moon fingers. Which is perfect because Gina Kirscheheiter literally always looks like a character on Star Trek.
Dramy, dramy, dram-dramzs on last night’s Real Housewives Of Orange County. So Emily Simpson was really glad that after all the rumors, speculation, and gossip Shane could come to Tamra Judge‘s party, be his best Mormon self, and everyone would get to know ‘the real Shane.’ Except The Real Shane(TM) turned out to be kinda worse than the Shane of everyone’s imagination. This is gonna go either one of two ways here, kids: Emily will find herself divorced, or her happy marriage will cost her the show next season!
This episode might as well have been titled The Real HouseHUSBANDS, because it was about bad husbands or lack thereof from start to finish. After our two week hiatus, we’re still on the golf course celebrating Vicki Gunvalson‘s 400th birthday. This day has more fits and starts than Vicki’s ever-evolving face. Suddenly Shanon Beador was storming away from the lunch table because Tamra “doesn’t care” about Shannon’s opinion.
After last Monday’s holiday hiatus, the Real Housewives of Orange County are back tonight with a vengeance. The PGA of drama ends with a hole in one of obscenities thanks to a fretful Shannon Beador, and the craziness bleeds over into a party hosted by Tamra Judgeto celebrate husband Eddie’s birthday. Vicki Gunvalson sees first hand the daily grind facing Gina Kirschenheiter due to her absentee husband, and, speaking of husbands, Tamra annoys the boredom out of normally even keeled Steve when pushing for a Vicki proposal.
Emily Simpson’s husband Shane is once again at the center of the controversy over that casino night situation with Gina Kirschenheiter that happened what seems like eons ago. However, it’s not Gina who takes issue with the poker pooper. Instead, she is crying on Emily’s shoulder about her own marriage woes while Kelly Dodd’s cougar claws come out to take aim at Shane. I swear, we can’t take these ladies anywhere!
The Real Housewives of Orange County star Tamra Judge is on pretty good terms with her castmates (so far!) this season. In a new interview with ET, the reality star talks about mending fences with Vicki Gunvalson and trying her hardest to help Shannon Beador. She also reveals why she stopped using her nickname when she joined the cast.
Tamra explains her name change, “Growing up, my mom called me Tammy. When I got [cast on] the show, there already was a Tammy, Tammy Knickerbocker. So, when I got hired, I remember on the phone I’m like, ‘Really? I got hired? I got hired?’ And I’m like, you know, ‘I know there’s already another Tammy, but my real name’s Tamra,’ and they’re like, ‘OK, we’re calling you Tamra,’ and there it was.”
Which is karma considering all the years Tamra has been practicing a particular brand of bad religion on everyone. What they’re really fighting over is how Tamra is sick of being good. Even Vicki Gunvalson, desperate to become Mrs. Steve Stupendously Staid And Boring, is letting her down, but she’s not allowed to fight with Vicki anymore… And what is it they say: Well behaved women rarely make things fun?
Last night’s Real Housewives Of Orange County was a lesson in marital “How Don’ts.” An exhibit of the worst kinds of marriages and men: The exes of Tamra Judge and Shannon Beador, the Davids, the Simons, and now the Shane’s… Oh my! Emily Simpson may have joined this show thinking her quirkily unconventional G-Chat love story was a modern day romance of surrogacy and women who earn equally to men, but one wrong outburst and the house of Hallmark cards came crumbling down on national TV. Shane should’ve known better than to join this show – after all, he hates loud women.
While some of us (ahem, David) think Shannon is too much to handle, she’s just getting started! Which means launching a low-fat food business on QVC so we can all continue on the “weight journey” with her. If eating like Shannon gives you Shannon’s life, I’ll stick to eating cookies!
The only thing that assaulted my senses more than Gina Kirschenheiter’svoice on this week‘s Real Housewives of Orange County was Shannon Beador’s poker suit. However, what truly grated on my last nerve was newbie Emily Simpson’s husband Shane harping about how loud Gina was. His wife threw a poker party that included shots of Fireball as part of the place setting which was being filmed for a reality show. Did he expect demure whispers? He surely knew what his wife was signing up for when she joined the cast. Annoying.
On the other hand, should Emily even be a part of this cast? From my perspective she seems far too intelligent and normal to roll with this crew. Even her take on Gina’s foul mouth and Shane’s whining is measured, mature, and gracious. Her legal background is going to serve her well on RHOC—well, it likely won’t help her deal with the other orange wielding wackadoos, but it will be beneficial to viewers who want to read a well-written blog that isn’t fraught with typos and horrible grammar.
I realize that the Real Housewives of Orange County started it all, and we’ve gotten some fabulously dramtastic additional members of the franchise in its wake. However, who determines when a Bravo staple has jumped the shark? I’m not saying RHOC needs to be retired. Shannon Beador hot tubbing in Spanx was television gold. Vicki Gunvalson’s inability to form a sincere apology is always mildly entertaining. Even Kelly Dodd and Tamra Judge have been easy(ish) to watch this season (did I really just type that?). That said, I can’t get over the newbies. When will Andy Cohen learn? No extra is going to infiltrate this dysfunctional foursome.
It’s a bit of a shame. I’m sure Emily Simpson and Gina Kirschenheiter are lovely people, but they are nothing more than filler. Even if they were the most interesting women in the world, no one would be interested in their storyline. The foursome runs off anyone in its path, but I have to hand it to Gina. At least she’s attempting so somewhat stir the pot with her screeching voice and her constant brashness in the name of authenticity. I actually really like her, but she won’t last. Maybe she’ll be picked up by another member of the franchise that has an easier orientation than subjecting newbies to the Kook of Coto.