Yay! It’s that time of the week again when Real Housewives of New York’s Dorinda Medley takes us on on the crazy, sense-makin’, straight talkin’ ride that is her blog. This week she reflects on why she’s proud of Sonja Morgan for standing her ground against Bethenny Frankel, why she loves Ramona Singer “like a sister” despite ‘Mona’s ridiculousness, and why wearing a once piece, well-made swimsuit is always the right choice in poolside lounge wear! #burntheyellowbikini
“Hello boys and girls! Welcome to storytime with Aunt Dori. Before we get started with this week’s adventure, a disclaimer: Everyone is crazy. Thanks,” begins Dorinda. Starting with her commentary on the Parkside dinner, Dorinda says more shade was served than rolls that night. “It was a handful of bitchery, and I feel like I overstepped and should have just kept my damn mouth shut about Sonja—or better yet, just defended her more. Who am I to pipe in, really? I have gone through so much grief (sometimes literally) in my life, and the one thing I needed most was a good support system.”
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Saying Sonja is a “kind, sensitive, and incredibly savvy woman,” Dorinda vows not to get caught up in future drama. (Good luck with that, Aunt Dori!) “Believe me, I only want the very best for Sonja and if she has a few fun nights out, then have it,” Dorinda adds. “No big deal. As B would say, let’s all get off her jock and let Sonja do Sonja. So Lady Morgan: I love you, I support you, and I am here for you—always.”
At Luann de Lesseps’ Warwick Hotel event, Dorinda admits she was surprised Ramona came in with guns blazing for Kristen Taekman. “This suite was truly beautiful. No, sumptuous! Anyway, the cocktail party was going swimmingly until fee fi fo fum, Ramona smelled the blood of a pretty girl… In she entered, clad in royal blue, going in for the kill… Look, Ramona likes to be direct and get things off her chest ASAP. She has always been like this, but I think with all the twists and turns life’s thrown at her lately, she’s trying to fine tune her skills. Of course, I was a little taken aback. I swear…one minute, I’m enjoying a drink, the girls and the suite, and the next, there MIGHT be a glass thrown again, and this one isn’t plastic.”
Adding that Kristen was gracious enough to leave before throwing a glass, Dorinda professes her love for the Ramonacoaster. “In fairness, I love love love LOVE Ramona, and she’s been an incredible friend to me. After all we’ve been through, I practically consider her my sister. She has been there for me through good times and bad, (and boy, there have been many bad times), and I will always be there for her. This time, though, I have to call FOUL! Yes, she wanted to talk to Kristen and express her opinion, but this was a shakedown à la Ramona. Sister… back it up and back it up QUICK,” snipes Dorinda.
Once Bethenny showed up to the party, it was “off to the races” with the women piling on her. “As is usually the case, once she arrives, they go at her…Why? Why? WHY?!” asks Dorinda. “What is it about this girl that attracts women to her like bees to honey? I don’t get involved and just watch them carry on like children. I’m taking notes, though. And certainly taking names. I’ve literally seen groups of drag queens at a roast be more compelling and charming and pleasant than this tribe gets with the Queen B.”
Moving on to the Turks and Caicos trip, and all of its attendant teenage antics, Dorinda admits she was looking forward to an actual vacation – not a circus. But a circus she got, nonetheless! “Ah. Turks and Caicos. How I thought I knew ye…” begins Dorinda. “As we pulled up, I thought we’d all be normal—you know, drop off the bags off in the foyer, go have a drink outside, get some sun, and BE NORMAL. That’s usually my experience: arrival, greeting, cocktail, short time to unwind, nice stroll throughout the house, exchange compliments with the service staff, admire the view, then either go to the room selected for you, or gingerly select the room you prefer. This was like seven desperate virgins were released backstage at a Chippendale’s preview at Penn Station. You’d swear we were scavenging for La Mer products and hidden spa certificates under the beds. Seriously, I almost felt like looking up the nearest Four Seasons just in case. Ultimately, I just want a bed, a TV, and a shower. If I want a view, I’ll GO OUTSIDE. But, in the end, I got a great room overlooking the beach, so thanks and you’re welcome.”
Although Ramona’s yellow bikini will burn in our memories forever, Dorinda advises, “I, on the other hand, try to stick to one-pieces from Eres swimwear. Elegant, well made, and keeps it all nice,” adding, “And if you want stripper shoes like Ramona’s—I mean, Carole [Radziwill’s]—go to discountstripper.com. Seriously. Anyway, lend something to Ramona, and you won’t get it back, princess. Good luck with that.” Excited about a scrumptious dinner the first night, Dorinda “didn’t realize Sonja was the main course. Sigh! Now, I know Bethenny meant well, but these people all seem to struggle with “time and place” issues. I mean, we had two minutes of peace before the Great Room Raid, followed by two hours of poolside aerobics. And here we are, Bethenny giving Sonja the third degree, in front of a live studio audience. Painful.”
Dorinda closes her blog by praising Sonja’s fortitude in dealing with the tidal wave of emotional projection that Bethenny embodies, commenting, “I was proud of Sonja for standing her ground and making that point clear. I think she’d had enough, and it’s officially boiled over. I get it, it’s tough. It’s hard to be open when you are going though stuff in life. There’s a combination of fear, pride and and the yearning for privacy that takes hold. I think Sonja wanted to just enjoy herself for a few days and not be the focus of anyone’s attention.” Dorinda’s advice for Housewives in need of helping other Housewives everywhere? She says, “Let’s give Ramona all the attention…she loves it! Or Luann…after all, she’s apparently having great sex that makes her feel complete again. (Don’t tell her I said this, but it’s really simple: She’s in love. She’s still in love. That’s why it’s so fulfilling.)” Ooooh! Thanks for the tea, Aunt Dori!
In this week’s RHONY first look, it appears that Dorinda is the life-coach-in-training Sonja turns to in her hour of need. But that doesn’t stem the tide of exploding emotions that have been previewed, it seems. Tune in tonight as we live-Tweet the crazy continuation of the Turks and Caicos trip with the ladies! It’s also the show’s 100th episode tonight!
TELL US: WHAT DO YOU THINK OF DORINDA’S TAKE ON SONJA AND BETHENNY? WILL SHE GET CAUGHT UP IN THE TURKS AND CAICOS DRAMA?
Photo Credit: Twitter/Bravo
