Recaps

Dance Moms recap

Sheesh! Drama much? What a silly question. After all, we’re talking about Abby Lee Miller and Dance Moms! Last night was certainly no picnic in the park (ahem) amid the studio owner’s mounting legal issues. Abby’s bankruptcy is once again in the news, and she’s favoring the minis, so you can imagine how well that goes over with Jill and her cackling hens. But hey, we’re spared the monotony of a pyramid, so that’s a silver lining, right?

Last night’s episode begins with the mothers speculating about Abby’s bankruptcy woes and what it could mean for their daughters’ careers. On cue, Abby comes dramatically sweeping into the studio. Refusing to acknowledge anyone, she quickly locks herself in her office. She doesn’t have time for such frivolous activities as teaching her students. Can you blame her? And, as I just said, there is no pyramid to endure. There is also no sign of Jessalyn and JoJo Siwa. Jill reveals she’s tried calling several times with no response.

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Real Housewives of Orange County recap

Despite appearances, nobody actually “won” on last night’s episode of Real Housewives Of Orange County. Everybody lost – even Meghan Edmonds.

Kelly Dodd‘s motto is, “If you’re not first, you’re last.” Well, there ya go. Poor Meghan only lost by association. I cannot believe four so-called adult women were behaving so Jerry Springer and then jumping through hoops trying to deny, deflect, and justify their actions. It was nonstop sifting through everyone lying while pointing fingers at other people’s lies. Yep, I’m looking at you Tamra Judge, Shannon Beador, and ESPECIALLY Vicki Gunvalson!

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Dolores hosts a Housewarming Party

Last night was the pre-finale for Real Housewives Of New Jersey. Since Jacqueline Laurita had laryngitis, she let Milinia do all the talking for her. Finally because at least Milania’s outbursts make a lot more sense! A silent Jacq is still deadly though… thank be the powers of the smart phone put into dumb hands.

Oh that Milania, I don’t care – I love her. Teresa Giudice acknowledges that Milania is not adjusting well to Juicy being “away.” And why should she? On Juicy’s first day in the slammer, Joe, Melissa Gorga, and the kids come over with sprinkle cookies Chinese food to check in on Teresa and the girls. They find Milania mouthing off all kinds of projecting, and Teresa is in a tailspin.

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Nicole-Azan-Talking-Head-90-Day-Fiance

90 Day Fiance might not promise true love to all of its terribly dysfunctional couples, but it sure does promise to make the rest of us feel pretty good about our lives! On last night’s episode, Anfisa tells Jorge straight up (again) that she’s here for his money, not him. Somehow, this news is shocking to Jorge. Yet not shocking to every other earthling who’s seen even ONE episode of this season.

Chantel begs forgiveness after lying to her family about Pedro for two and half months, and Nicole starts to question Azan’s “love” for her after they have yet another argument. Also, Azan needs to up his meds if he’s gonna last another week with Nicole. Especially when she tries to explain feminism to him. Yes, friends: Nicole is abroad trying to explain women’s rights to the general populace! Meanwhile, Azan is still trying to explain how being healthy and fit is a good thing, not an infringement on Nicole’s right to bare arms.

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Little Women: LA recap

On last night’s Little Women: LA, Christy McGinity Gibel rolled the dice… and lost again. In an effort to extend a virtually rotten olive branch, Christy invited the ladies to a Casino Night. She also suspiciously invited surprise guests to the event, including Little Women: NY henchman defender, Dawn Lang. But her passive-aggressive (emphasis on the aggressive) tactics, which included revealing her head injury medical records within the invitation, didn’t do much to win friends and influence enemies. Christy was, as ever, her very own worst enemy.

Meanwhile, Terra Jole and Joe Gnoffo are still on the baby name hamster wheel. She firmly wants D’Artanyan, although they’ve already agreed on Grayson. Joe concedes that – FINE! – they can add D’Artanyan to Grayson’s middle name. Terra stops whining, and concludes that she’ll be calling this kid D’Artanyan whenever she feels like it. Hmmmmph!

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Little Women: Atlanta Reunion Recap

Reality TV reunions are by nature, just for the sake of rehashing the same drama we watched all season and in some cases, get some new insight into why some things went down the way they did during the show’s season. Oh and to see who stayed friends and who hates each other now.

Little Women: Atlanta is no different. While we did not really get to the bottom of anything, we sure know who hates each other again. We also got treated to a barrage of interesting insults such as “you belong on the animal channel” and “two ash trays for ankles.” At least those are some new ones.

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Survivor recap

After last week’s fantastic, best episode of the season, things definitely calmed down a bit this week on Survivor. That’s not to say it wasn’t a great episode (OK, great may be a stretch, but it was a solid episode nonetheless). But with Jeff Probst announcing #dropyourbuffs tonight, much of the episode felt slow, as it took a lot of time familiarizing us with the new tribes that were formed. It ended with another interesting Tribal Council and the episode overall set the stage for what will be coming in the following weeks.

I’m about to break-down tonight’s Episode 5, so here’s your last chance to turn back, as spoilers are a-coming. You’ve been warned.

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Dance Moms recap

I’m not going to bend your ears anymore complaining about why in the name of all that is decent Lifetime has decided that ninety minutes is the new norm when it comes to this season’s Dance Moms episodes. I guess the network just doesn’t have any reality stars that are as riveting as Abby Lee Miller and her band of dancers. I should be used to it by now, and it will be a special treat if I ever check the Lifetime schedule and see a show only spanning an hour. Silver linings! Of course, the veteran moms are still feuding with the mini mothers.

The episode begins with a heart wrenching announcement from Kira. A friend of Kalani Hilliker’s from the Arizona dance community has committed suicide. She has spoken with Abby and hopes the difficult topic will be addressed with the team. After last week’s solo bomb, it’s no surprise that Abby isn’t in the greatest mood for this week’s pyramid. Since they didn’t compete, the minis are spared the pyramid and sent to work with a guest choreographer. Abby vows to make more time for them this week, as she hopes she’ll find a mini-Maddie in the bunch.

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