Did I miss something on last night’s Vanderpump Rules? Did James Kennedy admit to hooking up “just a little” with Kristen Doute? Even more curious – did the cameras actually miss James and Kristen drunkenly hooking up?!
What I think I observed was a drunken game of telephone. Or whatever it’s called in the iPhone era. Probably something to do with Snapchatting and then sharing Snaps that were deleted and how you thought you were sexting your boyfriend SUPER ROB when in fact you were sending a disgraced Nigerian prince $300 to get his crown out of hock and on a plane to LA to bar tend into his future at SUR. I mean this could finally be the man for Scheana Marie!
Anyway! Using delightful time lapse, the episode opens hours early with Stassi Schroeder sitting on a beach with Katie Maloney and Kristen. The sand is soft and fuzzy – just like their drink-addled memories from every day the night before.
The 2018 calendar gave us a trifecta of happiness on Sunday with Easter candy, April fool’s pranks, and the premier of season three of The Real Housewives of Potomac! I might still be on a Peeps sugar high, but in my opinion the ladies are looking better than ever. So let’s jump into it!
First off are flashbacks to last year’s finale and reunion that show Karen Huger in the hot seat. She’s moved into her downsized rental that boasts a whopping 14,000 square feet. No one is buying her act and the gossip is running rampant. Shortly after the season wrapped, the Washington Post ran a story that the Hugers owe the IRS 1.5 million. This gets everyone talking and speculating. Robyn Dixon knows lots of dirt and isn’t shy about spreading it around, but we’ll get to that later.
Could y’all believe Kody Brown’s shocking announcement during last night’s Sister Wives? Ten more seasons with eighteen two hour episodes in each! Woohoo! April Fool’s! 🙂 In the hard-hitting final installment of what has been reported to be the final season, Andrea Canning tackles all the tough questions. First up…is Tony an official Brown? If talking down to his wife Mykelti and wanting a 4,000 taco party for any occasion makes one a Brown, Tony’s about to knock Kody right off his throne! Christine is adamant that Tony is a Brown. Andrea probes deeper, asking, “But what actually does he bring to your family?” Her questions reflect what the people really want to know! Christine exclaims he brings the excitement and pizzazz. Kody seconds that Tony has that million dollar personality. The tell-all spends all of a minute to recap half the season with Mykelti and Tony’s wedding. Andrea wonders if there was a concern about Mykleti’s maturity level in getting married. Of course! Christine pipes in to assure the masses that the kids adhered to the Brown’s projected budget…although that isn’t how it appeared to play out during the first eighteen hours of this season. The couple stuck to the money plans. Why else would Mykleti have made all of those fabric flowers. Saving money, folks!
Kody then avoids the hot seat by discussing how he balances his separate personal lives with each wife. When a fifth wife is proposed, Christine isn’t feeling it. Janelle is fine with it because we all know she’s already got one foot out the door. Robyn wants to say no, but she recognizes that love multiplies, it doesn’t divide. Meridoesn’t see it happening, but why are they asking her in the first place? Are they pretending she gets a vote?
Out of the blue Sheree is incredibly pressed about Porsha Williams supposedly warning Shamea Morton that none of the women can be trusted – including Sheree. Poor Sheree – she’s been carrying everyone’s bones while having Porsha’s back, and is repaid by Porsha dismissing their friendship. Now Sheree has a bone to pick with Porsha – except she’s passive aggressively avoiding her by hiding in her basement staring at the abyss of Moore Manor.
Why would Shamea, Porsha’s so-called BFF, be sharing her text message with Desperee?! Hmmm… We never get an answer to that by the way.
As Michael perfectly summarized this week on Survivor: Ghost Island, this season was supposed to be about “Reversing curses, not creating new ones.” Well, “Hold my beer,” says the Malolo Tribe. Now six Tribal Councils deep into Season 36, the Malolo Tribe – whose members have been shuffled up over the weeks – has now gone to five of them. That’s not going to bode well for those that have to continue to endure voting someone out, because as good as you might think you are strategically or physically, you’re not going to last too long if you keep setting dates with Jeff Probst every three days.
But before we dive in, as I do at the beginning of every Recap, please heed the following: Remember that this recap assumes that you have already seen this week’s Episode 6 of Survivor: Ghost Island, so if you have not and don’t want to be spoiled, please come back later! It’s important to add too that while we WILL hit on all of the important developments of the episode, this is not a linear “blow-by-blow” recap, and is more of a discussion and reaction of what we just witnessed together.
CLICK THE CONTINUE READING BUTTON FOR MORE, AND THIS IS YOUR LAST *SPOILER* WARNING!
Last night was a good episode of Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills. There was no particular reason – it wasn’t filled to the brim with drama, but it showcased the women in their elements and was filled with some real moments like Kyle Richards ultimate friendship faux pas. Excitingly we also got a lot of background information on Lisa Vanderpump, plus DoritKemsley almost overdosed (kinda, sorta) on flu medication which was hilariously so Dorit. (Yes, I’m a sadist). However the big exciting news was their trip to Berlin.
Unfortunately there is more bad news for Lisa and Ken. Days after losing Pink Dog unexpectedly, Pikachu passed away. Now Lisa is worried for the fate of all her dogs. She looks them over, this mountain of fluffery and docility, she decides each needs to be installed with a tracking device and cloned straight away. It’s what Nanny Kay would recommend after all! And she was a woman of sense; a medic during WWII who survived The Blitz, and then, in her elder years, moved with Lisa and Ken to LA when they opened their first restaurant there – a PIZZA JOINT in the Sherman Oaks Mall. So, Lisa did live in The Valley?
I’m so tired of hearing about Jax Taylor and Brittany Cartwright‘s pathetic relationship. I’m so tired of it that I’m actually in agreement with Tom Sandoval on the matter: Brittany stupidly chose to stay with Jax knowing he’s a low-down, dirty scoundrel, so leave her alone to stew in her own Kentucky fried juices.
I personally think Brittany loooooves laying on that accent, thick as a beer cheese dipped chicken wing, and playing damsel in distress. Not to the guys – Jax already rescued her from a Hooters farm in ‘tucky – but to the girls on Vanderpump Rules. They see it as their responsibility to rescue Brittany. Maybe because those that can’t do a decent relationship, try to micromanage other’s disaster relationships. Or maybe they know they’re all a lost cause but sweet, innocent Brittany of the slow blinking My Little Pony eyes and Dr. Pepper flavored Bonne Belle chapstick – they can save her from the Jaxing that destroyed Stassi Schroeder and so many before (and during and after) her!
I never suspected Kenya had faked her marriage, but like NeNe Leakes alluded I always assumed Kenya was much more in love with Marc than he is with her. Just based purely on how Kenya describes him and their relationship gives me the willies actually! And seeing Marc, mingling around last night, something seemed … off. It wasn’t just camera jitters or nerves about what the women (and show) may have in store for him, it was an animosity. Dude, you married a woman on a TV show, you knew what you were getting into!