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Last night’s Survivor was a tad boring, if I do say so myself.  I can’t keep up with legitimate, semi-legitmate, and totally false alliances.  Who knew I’d be wishing Colton Cumbie was around to liven up this purely strategic mess?  I take that back…I’m glad he’s gone, but the remainder of this season is going to drag.  I usually have someone I am rooting for by this point, but…

The merged Tikiano is back at the beach after tribal council.  Troyzan and Model Jay are sad to see Jonas go.  Troyzan knows that the men’s former alliance has been upset by some of the guys’ loyalty to the Salani.  After a discussion with Jay, the two men seem to be back to the boys versus girls mentality.  The pair finds a message in a 7 Up bottle as tree-mail.  From the cryptic letter, it seems the winner of the reward challenge will get their fill of the un-cola.  #productplacement

The reward challenge involves each member on the chosen tribes to go down a super steep water slide and then head into the ocean to retrieve boxes that will ultimately be connected as a puzzle.  The winning tribe will be whisked to a 7 Up oasis…only Jeff Probst could make that sound so sexy.  The winners will partake in barbecue, burgers, key lime pie, and, of course, all the 7 Up they can drink.  To whet the teams pallets, each player is given a taste of the citrus beverage.  It’s “school-yard pick” as to who is on which team.  The first group is Jay Byars, Kat Edorsson, Troyzan, Alicia Rosa, and Chelsea Meissner versus everyone else…except Tarzan.  He wasn’t picked.

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Knowing that last night’s episode of Survivor was Colton-free, did you feel better about tuning in to watch?

The now merged tribe celebrates with champagne and cheese back at the beach. Everyone seems to be happy that it’s every player for themselves. Alicia is appalled to think that Christina is still in the game. Let the backstabbing begin! The following morning, Jonas is impressing the women with his culinary skills. Model Jay denies Tarzan some coffee, with Jay informing him that the coffee is only for the people who won it in the last challenge.

What? Tarzan can’t believe his former dude teammate isn’t reverting back to the guys versus the girls alliances. He approaches Mike about getting the gang back together, as the men and women are equal in numbers. Tarzan promises a female defector in the form of Alicia to create a stronger voting pool. Sure, yeah, sounds good, says Mike, who trusts Tarzan about as far as he can throw him. Interesting…it seems the most recent winners don’t want to play the way of the middle school dance with boys on one side and girls on the other.

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Y’all had to know Colton Cumbie of Survivor wasn’t going anywhere – heck, he may be getting more attention now that he’s off the show, than when he was the resident villain on the beach!

Colton has been speaking out about his time on the show, leaving before his time, and whether he has been fairly perceived by the viewing audience. Here’s a quick hint…Colton doesn’t seem to have any issue with how he was portrayed on the show. Finally, a reality star (I’ll use that term loosely) who isn’t blaming editing – that’s huge, especially for someone so hated!

He recently spoke with Jarett Wieselman with theinsider.com. Excerpts from that interview are below -

Have you been surprised by the haters?
Oh, not at all. Not at all. Once the show started airing, I knew. Coming out of it, my hope is that people would appreciate my game play. Let’s be honest, a little 20-year-old gay boy convincing a group of men to do what he wanted, without ever lifting a finger? They’ve never had anyone like me. It would be one thing if I helped out at camp, but I did nothing. I literally was their queen.

It seems like the gay community is the most incensed about your behavior — what do your gay friends think?
Oh, here we go – I’m about to get slayed for this. But to be honest, I don’t know many gay people. I really don’t. I have a boyfriend but he’s the straightest gay person you’ll ever meet – he hunts and fishes. But he’s proud of me. He thinks I did well. I just think the gays hate me because I’m a republican. Once that came out, they looked for any reason to hate me. To truly appreciate what I bring to the game, you have to like my sense of humor – I compare it to Chelsea Handler. I think people are just too sensitive.

Do you think the show presented a fair representation of who you are?
I’m not going to blame the edit. I was in control of my own actions. I did what you saw. I wish they focused more on my strategic gameplay than my comments, but then again, I’m glad I saw that because it helped me to grow as a person. Things were taken out of context, but that was me. I didn’t zero in on one person. I didn’t just zero in on Bill [Posely]. My hate knew no bounds [laughs].

Let’s talk about that Tribal Council where Bill went home — you took a lot of flack for your comments regarding race. Take me back to that night, what happened?
I think things were misinterpreted but I also think things were left out. Obviously I know more African American people than my housekeeper, but that’s what they chose to showcase. I don’t know how to say it without seeming ignorant, but I was being honest in a way. We are super close to my housekeeper. She is like family. I was trying to defend myself but it came across badly.

Do you see yourself as a “Survivor Villain?”
If we’re speaking strictly on gameplay, I’m totally a villain. I made it clear that you’re with me or you’re against me. If you don’t think I was running the show, then you weren’t watching [laughs]. I take pride in my villain title because it’s not something that’s easily earned. There are a lot of wannabes.

Many would argue you saved the most selfish move for last. Why did you keep The Immunity Idol?
I wouldn’t have been a villain if I didn’t do that. The irony is that I wanted to give the Idol away. I wanted to give it to Jay, but we were separated so I couldn’t get it to him. I considered giving it to Christina for a millisecond, but she wouldn’t have known to do with it. I didn’t want to screw up Jay’s game by giving the Immunity Idol to someone on Manono.

As a fan of the game, how does it feel to have been medically removed and not voted out, or won?
It feels absolutely horrible. I don’t have closure. Had they blindsided me or voted me out, I would have been able to sit back and be OK with it. But they didn’t get me. I got myself, basically. My body turned against me. I was my own worst enemy. It’s frustrating. I lie in bed at night and wonder what got me sick. Bad crab? Evil coconut?

Do you know what it was?
They think it was a food born or water born [virus] – you know, I honestly wonder if I got taken out Caesar-style. Obviously you know I did nothing, so it would have been so easy for someone to poison my food [laughs].

Okay kids, so what did we learn? Colton seems pretty proud of being the most purposefully lazy person ever to grace Jeff Probst’s presence, he really loves his housekeeper, and the gay community likely hates him for being a Republican. I am not sure what to say…but at least he’s honest? The reunion is going to be interesting, to say the least!

A new episode airs tonight at 8PM ET on CBS.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF COLTON’S INTERVIEW? IS HE SHELTERED OR JUST A HORRIBLE SNOB? BOTH? DO YOU THINK COLTON COULD HAVE WON HAD HE NOT GOTTEN SICK?


I hope you tuned in to last night’s Survivor, if for no other reason than to see how much more awful Colton could behave.

After voting off Monica, mean girls Colton and Alicia tell Christina that she has no friends and no allies. Colton compares her to a cockroach after a nuclear war, surviving things she shouldn’t have and suggests she form an alliance with a hermit crab. The duo won’t let Christina have any space in their shelter. Alicia feels the need to get some jabs in at Christina’s expense so Colton doesn’t think she’s too soft. I can’t BELIEVE she teaches special ed. For shame.

It’s been a tad chilly at night on the island, and Salani awakens to a clue that promises childhood backyard shenanigans and potential sweet treats. Kat had a dream where she was murdered by Alicia at the mall. Troyzan is just thrilled he’s not on the misfit Manono tribe.

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On last night’s Survivor, Colton continued to play puppet master. The tribes divided, and one was a lot more stacked than the other…I’m just sayin’. Colton has his new tribe eating out of the palm of his uncalloused, manicured hand, and I want to reach through my screen and pluck one of his eyebrows more than the other so they’d look uneven. That’s true retaliation, let me tell you.

The Salani awake after not having to attend tribal council. They can’t believe that the men of Manono are such a mess. The women hope that the merge is impending, as they are now seven strong against the men’s crumbling brood. Jeff Probst invites the teams to the reward challenge and calls for a tribe switch. Colton looks like someone just yanked his favorite silver spoon right out of his mouth! The new teams will be chosen at random. Each player will receive an egg. Jeff will count down to when everyone can smash their egg against their chest. The color of the yolk will determine the new tribes. The blues are Salani while the orange is Manono. I will say, it seems the blue team got the best of both. It will be fun watching Colton and Alicia vie for attention on the new orange team.

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It was the tribal council heard round the world…you know, the one the men’s winning tribe shouldn’t have even been attending. Survivor fans witnessed a great deal of ignorance from Colton Cumbie, the homosexual, rich, Republican, college student who grew up in Alabama charging everything to his parents’ credit cards and hanging out at the country club.

Colton, who fancies himself the leader of the Manono (having received the immunity idol from the women doesn’t hurt his rank either), unleashed some ugly on his hated nemesis, poor stand-up comic Bill Posely. As his tribe mates looked on, most staying silent, Bill was voted off the show. As he said his parting words, Bill displayed, in my opinion, a great deal of class in his dismissal.

In an interview with People.com, Bill opens about why he decided to agree with the Manono to give up immunity to the losing Salani - a first in the history of the show, as well his thoughts on “spoiled brat” Colton. Read that interview below.

Why would you agree to give up immunity?!
I thought I had guys like Jonas, Troy, Matt and Jay on my side and that I could get them to help me blindside Colton. I figured we could go in to Tribal Council and reveal Colton for who he is. I didn’t know how much power Colton had. I didn’t know he didn’t like me. I didn’t even know he had an idol until Leif said something. It all came crashing down at Tribal Council.

Why did Colton have such an issue with you?
I think that the tribe gave me a lot of attention when I was being funny and goofing off and unfortunately it took the spotlight off of him. I think he was used to being in control of his life. He hated having a lot of attention being on someone else.

Your confrontation with him at camp was very heated.
I tried to go up and make some sort of offer of the olive branch and see if we could talk this out, but he didn’t want to talk. Finally I was fed up with playing nice. Nobody else was standing up to him and I couldn’t take it anymore, so I said what I feel like everybody needed to be saying: “He’s a spoiled brat and can’t talk to anybody the way he wants to.”

Colton called Leif a munchkin and an Oompa Loompa.
It is horrible. Colton comes from a spoiled, sheltered, ignorant background. To be able to go to your church with your boyfriend and live with him as an openly gay man and not be persecuted and ridiculed in a town in Alabama – that’s so rare. He was never persecuted and ridiculed because his family is so affluent and they spoil him. He doesn’t know the hurt that a guy like Leif had to deal with his whole life. Colton doesn’t know how it is to be picked on so he thinks its okay to call Leif a munchkin or Oompa Loompa. He thinks it’s okay to call me ghetto trash and say that I should kill myself. It’s crazy.

You two had it out at Tribal Council.
He said in Tribal that he “doesn’t associate himself with poor people” and to “take my broke ass home.” I think it was just a classist thing. He’s ignorant and just didn’t like that I was from a different walk of life than him. To have everyone sit quietly while Colton said those things about me was hard.

Tarzan spoke up.
For him to defend Colton after what he had heard was appalling.

Did you take anything positive out of this experience?
I had a mom write to me and tell me her and her daughter were tearing up listening to me talk at Tribal and were so sad about what Colton had said. I thought I would be the funny guy not somebody that people would be inspired by.

As one would expect, Colton is quick to respond to Bill’s statements, and like any good reality star, he’s learned that Twitter is where people air their dirty laundry regarding their celebreality peers. After receiving well-deserved backlash, Colton took to the twitterverse to defend himself and apologize…sort of…okay, not really.

The controversial Survivor tweeted recently, “Were my comments ignorant? YES! They were meant to be funny..I see they weren’t. Do I regret them? I’m torn. In a way, yes b/c it hurt ppl.”

He continued, in 140 characters or less, by stating, “..but seeing myself act that way on television helps me to grow as a person b/c it’s uncomfortable and embarrassing for ME to watch. It’s kind of one of those situations where you you don’t really realize how you sound until it’s played back and you’re literally cringing..”

Colton sums up his response tweets with the following nugget, admitting, “I seriously don’t hate anyone. I make fun of MYSELF..my sense of humor as always been kind sarcastic and somewhat critical. I call myself a “queen” as a joke. Am I a bigot? I don’t think so. I think I was a 20 year old brat who had never been out into the real world, and what I thought was funny and ok wasn’t. I’ve learned I can still be funny and it doesn’t have to be at the expense of some1 else. *pageant wave*”

Well, I’m happy that both he and Bill can agree that Colton acted like a total brat, at the very least. I’m all about letting stupid behavior slide (you have to when part of your job involves writing about Kim Kardashian!), but I can’t help but think that Colton is trying to do more damage control and less soul-searching. Here’s hoping Jeff Probst *pageant waves* him out of tribal council sooner rather than later!

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF BILL’S INTERVIEW? DO YOU BELIEVE THAT COLTON WAS TRYING TO BE FUNNY? ARE HIS TWEET SINCERE? HOW MUCH LONGER DO YOU THINK COLTON WILL LAST ON THE SHOW?


Last night’s Survivor started off simple enough…the women have gained momentum, the once unified Manono are beginning to crumble. However, I never thought I would see or hear what I did. Boo to you, Colton. Boo. To. You. And to think, last week I thought we’d be biffles if I ever met you on the street. Shame on me.

The men head back to camp after sending Hairless Matt packing. The remaining Muscles can’t believe the outcasts have aligned. Tarzan and Troyzan decide Bill needs to be next, not because they don’t like him – quite the opposite! Bill is so charming he’s dangerous, potentially eroding the core alliance of five.

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Oh ladies of Survivor, did any of you ever watch an episode before coming on this show? Perhaps you did, as you finally made some headway on last night’s episode.

A storm’s a brewin’ on the beach, and Colton invites the women to the men’s camp, which has more shelter to survive the elements. The women politely decline, because… They. Are. Tough. The women are freezing and wind-blown, when the downpour begins. They are huddled together under a flimsy palm-frond tent. Good times! Thankfully, the Salani make it through the night. They are cold, hungry, and tired, and with their fire gone, they don’t know what they’ll be eating. Troyzan and Colton allow the women to come dry off by their roaring fire. Of course the men have fire…they are a cohesive team. Some of the women are proud they didn’t cave in to sleep at the guy’s camp, but they have no shame in using their fire. Hairless Matt is not amused to find boobs in his camp.

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