Real Housewives Of New Jersey Recap: Secrets Revealed

The Real Housewives of New Jersey’s Jersey Shore trip is heating up! On last week’s episode    , we ended with a confrontation kicking off between Margaret Josephs and Jennifer Aydin. It seems like everyone is always vying for Teresa Giudice’s approval, and that’s why they fight. Everyone always wants to be in her good graces, so they all go to war for it. On top of that, arguing over someone’s parenting is just a no go. Big faux pas.

A big moment coming in this episode is Melissa Gorga’s sit down with Danielle Staub. Danielle is forever a source of controversy, and the women have had enough. None of the wives want anything to do with her. Melissa is supposed to be the one to deliver that message. Good luck! I would assume that Danielle isn’t going down without one last scandal. It’s time for the end of her and Teresa. GIVE IT TO US.

Melissa Gorga Real Housewives Of New Jersey

Jackie Goldschneider’s husband Evan Goldschneider is finally on the trip, so now everyone has someone except Teresa. We need to find Teresa a new man! Maybe she’ll find that nice Jewish boy she wants, and we can meet him next season. Toodles Joe Giudice! Enjoy Italy!

There Jersey boardwalk looks like such a chill place to hangout. I’ve always wanted to go, but the opportunity hasn’t ever come up. If I’m not getting arrested for day drinking like a drunk meatball, it won’t be worth it.

Everyone is so pushy about Dolores Catania’s love life. Her and Frank Catania have a good thing going right now as friends, so why ruin that. Joe Gorga should maybe butt out of it, and worry about his own life and troubles.

The group splits up, and now the real fun can begin. Joe and Melissa go for a walk along the beach where she partied four noses ago. Romantic! They talk about Teresa missing out on the kind of love they have. I don’t know about THAT.

Teresa is missing love sure, but the Melissa/Joe love isn’t the gold standard. Joe tries to convince Melissa to just enjoy life and table their “new baby” talk. I wonder how much of this has to do with a bruised ego from that low sperm count.

Jennifer and Teresa aren’t impressed with Margaret making a dig about Jen not having a job. It was a rude jab, but Jennifer was minimizing a bonding moment between Marge and Teresa. What was the point of that? Although, Jennifer is the best thing going for the season right now. She keeps things fresh.

Dolores Catania Real Housewives Of New Jersey

Dolores doesn’t understand why Margaret is so hellbent on destroying Jennifer. She gives her a pass on everything she says for some reason. Why? She says it’s because Jennifer doesn’t seem to come from a malicious place. However, how often can you use ignorance as an excuse for her? Cut it out Dolo!

Jennifer’s doing shots before dinner, so someone is going to be on the receiving end of a verbal attack. WHO LET’S HER DO THIS? The end result is the same every single time. Chaos.

Melissa is walking right into the lion’s den by sitting down with Danielle. She’s unpredictable at best and unhinged at worst. Melissa is not the type to handle the kind of attack she might receive. Putting herself on display for Danielle to destroy is a bold choice.

Melissa going there solely to tell Danielle they’re all done with her is a little iconic though. Danielle has brought so much to this show, so it’s cool she’s getting this kind of sendoff. Not everyone gets that MOMENT.

Margaret Josephs Real Housewives Of New Jersey

Jackie is a beer chugging monster oh my god. I didn’t think she’d beat all of the guys in the contest, but she wiped the floor with them. It’s about damn time we drag some personality out of her. Sometimes she’s such a snooze to watch. Give us more of THIS version of Jackie.

Jennifer (of course) ruins the moment by saying “you know how to suck a bottle, but you can’t suck a dick?” WHO SAYS THAT? I mean, it was hilarious, but she opened herself up to a fight.

Margaret chimes in to come at Jennifer about the comments and about ruining her moment with Teresa. Is it really that deep honey? I mean seriously. Not everything is a calculated attack. It was rude, but we can move on. Even Teresa is perplexed as to why this is an actual fight they’re having.

Jennifer Aydin Real Housewives Of New Jersey

Jennifer is right to claim being a stay at home mother as her profession. That’s a hard ass job, and not many people can do it. Period. Margaret is barking up the wrong tree making an issue out of that. That’s not a good look whatsoever.

Melissa thinks Jennifer is going into dangerous territory by bringing up parenting, but Marge did it first. She opened the door big time for that one. Jennifer goes low by bringing up Margaret’s situation with her kids, but Marge still takes it to the next level. As usual.

She says the only accomplishment Jennifer’s ever had was marrying someone rich. Now that’s just tasteless to say. Anyone that sees Jennifer with her children can attest otherwise. Jennifer hits Marge with the iconic line that “Fred Flintstone called, he wants his outfit back”.

I AM DYING. FULLY DECEASED AND DECOMPOSING. How can you not laugh at that? Her ensemble really did look like something out of Bedrock.

Jennifer Aydin Bill Aydin Real Housewives Of New Jersey

The guys are going fishing which is really a disguise for a drinking trip. They’re getting Bill Aydin so smashed. Jennifer isn’t going to be impressed with that at all. How many fish do we actually expect these guys to catch out here? It’s good to see Bill actually having fun for a change. He’s usually so serious every time they show him.

I can’t picture Jennifer, Dolores, and Teresa parasailing. This is the pinnacle of hilarity for me. I love seeing Housewives get totally taken out of their element. It adds something fresh to the show for me. Plus, Jennifer’s weird burping reaction was GOLD on it’s own. She’s just bobbing around on the boat burping up a storm.

While those women are thrill seeking, the other three are living it up grandma style. A game of mini golf is definitely a lot more exciting. I came into this season loving these three the most, but now they just bore me. Next.

Melissa has no desire to attend this meeting with Danielle, but they must formally kick her out of the group. WEIRD. Danielle is smart though. Say what you want about them, but Melissa and Teresa run this show. If she can get in the good graces of both, she can keep her spot. Making nicey nice with Melissa is her only shot at staying.

The ladies reunite, and Jennifer debuts her “sorry not sorry” T-shirt which doesn’t go over like she expected.  It was cheesy, but still funny ish. Not everyone gets Jennifer, but she at least tries to be funny.

Jennifer is a little miffed about Bill getting wasted with the guys. It’s good to see him having fun though. She’s never seen him this drunk, but we cant say that same about her. The Tequila monster comes out quite too often.

Melissa Gorga Real Housewives Of New Jersey

Melissa’s meeting with Danielle is going to be SO GOOD. I’ve been dying to see how Teresa and Danielle’s friendship ended, and we are sooo close. The fallout is sure to be EPIC. Danielle should be nervous because this is the end.

Melissa attempts to explain to Danielle where she went wrong with Margaret. Good luck with that. She drops the bomb that none of the girls want to be around her. There’s no way Teresa is going to like Melissa saying she’s not in her right mind right now. OOF.



[Photo Credit: Bravo]