What’s a crew to do when The Wellington has to stay docked for an entire charter? Looks like we’re about to find out on this week’s episode of Below Deck Mediterranean! In the closing moments of last week, Bugsy Drake brought a (literal) storm along for her return to Below Deck Med, and the torrential downpour isn’t letting up any time soon. Could this be a bad omen for the veteran second stew’s return?
But before we get ahead of ourselves, let’s handle some housekeeping, shall we? Did anyone clock that Pete Hunziker has officially been removed from the show’s opening credits? It’s worth nothing, considering the lead deckhand was brusquely fired from the show after posting a perversely racist image on social media. In the aftermath of his firing, Bravo and 51 Minds vowed to “minimize” the yachtie’s appearances throughout the remainder of the season. This seems like an obvious first step. However, we can still expect to see less of Pete as the charter season goes on. (Well, and Bravo’s editing catches up with his ouster).
Back to Bugsy, ya’ll. Since her time on the Sirocco in Season 2, the second stew has been working on a private/charter boat as a chief stew. In her confessional, she admits the only person she’d take a step down on the hierarchy for is Captain Sandy Yawn. And also the Bravo paycheck, of course. Captain Sandy is thrilled to have Bugsy aboard, as is Malia White. Less enthused is Hannah Ferrier, who exchanges an awkward hug with her old nemesis in the laundry room.
The chief stew lays it out in her confessional: she’s not about to trust — or befriend — her fellow Below Deck star. Not after Bugsy led the charge against Hannah back in Season 2 for her inappropriate relationship with a charter guest. Or for telling Hannah point blank that she was a full-on “lousy chief stew” in their days aboard the Sirocco. Bugsy on the other hand promises she’s keeping an open mind when it comes to her one-time frenemy. She’s even hoping she and Hannah can actually “balance out each other’s strengths” as a team. This mostly means Bugsy will be in charge of table decor for the rest of the charter season.
During a preference sheet meeting with Hannah, Malia, and Chef Kiko Lorran, Captain Sandy gives us an overview of the upcoming charter’s guests: a New York financial consultant who really loves his dog and his pack of BFFS. They’re requesting a picnic on the beach (weather permitting) and a six-course tasting dinner from Kiko (plus dessert). Sounds pretty simple, right? As the roving band of entitled jet-setters come aboard, the crew realizes the bad weather will officially keep them docked for the first day. Naturally, Hannah complains that this turn of events will make her job one thousand percent harder since it will be solely up to the interior team to distract the guests from the fact that, you know, they’re not out at sea.
Distraction #1: Food! First, Kiko serves up a delicious snack of cranberry cheese, truffle, and manchego, with a bottle of Belevedere. (The alcohol comes courtesy of Bugsy‘s innate ability to anticipate guests’ needs. Somewhere down in the crew mess Hannah is seething.) Then comes a surf and turf lunch of filet mignon and shrimp with grilled asparagus and fresh truffle. Thumbs up all around for Kiko.
Distraction #2: A poker party! Considering this group of guests usually celebrates their friendship with a yearly trip to Vegas, the deck crew throws together a Sin City-style poker afternoon, headed up by Alex Radcliffe. However, the cigars and the revelry aren’t quite enough of a distraction for the deckhand to admit he’s already crushing on Bugsy. (Rob Westergaard‘s simmering romance with Jessica More takes a back seat to the stew’s arrival this week.) Or for Pete to be caught texting her predecessor Lara Flumiani from the crew mess. But frankly, the less said about that, the better. Let’s just say you dodged a bullet, Lara.
Distraction #3: A night at the club! What do you do when your boat is stuck on the dock? Send the guests ashore, of course. Following dinner — and a snippy moment between Hannah and the primary’s douchiest pal over oysters — all the guests disembark for a the promise of a VIP table at Tito’s. However, this swiftly turns into a nightmare when they bring back a whole party full of “friends” they met at the club. On lates, poor Hannah and Alex are left to oversee the drunken antics until well after 5 a.m. But as they say, what happens in
Vegas, err, I mean Mallorca…
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The next morning, the rain seems to have subsided. The wind has thankfully died down. Captain Sandy is anxious to get the boat out into the water. Well, that is until one charter guest asks Jessica if she can take a walk on the pier and keeps everyone waiting until after 9 a.m. By the time the guest flounces back to The Wellington in her neon yellow Balenciaga hoodie and matching slides, the wind has picked up again and that’s right, they’re stuck on the dock for another day due to the wind reaching over 20 knots.
Pete also causes a major problem as the crew attempts to disembark by releasing the wrong ground line. (Hmm…I thought you were a captain, Sweet Pete?) Naturally, the misogynist gives major attitude over the radio, blaming his error on Malia and giving lip to Captain Sandy. By the time they’ve aborted the departure plan altogether, Malia is ready to lose it on her lead deckhand. Captain Sandy may have been oblivious to his sarcasm in the moment, but you’d better believe it wasn’t lost on the bosun. Pete describes working under Malia as a “constant ego check” and complains that she always has to have the last word. Hate to tell you this, but that’s what it means to have a boss, sweetie. Of course, being stuck tied to the dock for the second day in a row leads us to…
Distraction #3: Toy Island and a beach picnic! If Sandy can’t leave the dock, every single water toy on The Wellington is coming out to play. Admit it. Were you even a little surprised? Anyone who’s been watching Below Deck Med for more than a single episode knows how much Sandy loves her toys. However, this time her strategy is all smoke and mirrors. Let’s give the guests the appearance of a good time despite still being in the exact same spot we picked them up in yesterday, OK?
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With Hannah still asleep from working the night before, Bugsy launches into chief stew mode to prep the beach picnic. She creates an entire checklist for Jessica, differentiates between plastic cups and glassware, and loads everything up for the deck crew to haul to the beach in a snap. But surprise! The primary wants his dog, and the group’s extra pals from the night before, to join in on the beach, so this party just got a bit more complicated.
As Malia takes the tender to the beach, Jessica finally wakes Hannah, who surprisingly pays Bugsy a compliment and admits she actually needs her as second stew. Wow! Is there a tiny sliver of hope for Hannah and Bugs this season? Here’s hoping, (except not really). Meanwhile, over on the beach, Rob informs Malia that Pete is still pouting over their earlier confrontation. However, with an entire beach picnic to set up, the bosun doesn’t have much time to worry about her sexist underling’s constantly-bruised ego. I mean, do any of us?
Just as the crew gets the party going, Captain Sandy gets a call from some sort of Mallorcan beach patrol. Apparently, no tents or glass are allowed on the sand. This means the crew has to scramble to take down literally everything they just set up. Ouch. Hannah sneaks in one final distraction, convincing the guests to go swimming while they dismantle the tent. However, if there’s no shade (or booze), everyone would rather go back to the boat. Oh and by the way, they’re bringing four more people back for dinner. Remember that six-course tasting dinner they requested? It just multiplied to the tune of 72 dishes for poor Kiko. However, we’ll have to wait until next week to see how he pulls the gargantuan feat off.
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TELL US — WILL HANNAH AND BUGSY BE ABLE TO WORK AS A TEAM? WILL MALIA AND PETE? WHICH DISTRACTION WORKED BEST ON THE BELOW DECK MEDITERRANEAN CHARTER GUESTS THIS WEEK?
[Photo Credit: Bravo]