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Colin Macy-O’Toole

Kate Chastain Below Deck

Andy Cohen announced that Real Housewives of Salt Lake City will join the Real Housewives franchise this past weekend at BravoCon. Both Andy and the Bravo Network hinted that a new Real Housewives show was on the way. However, it’s fair to say that most people did not expect the new show to take place in Salt Lake City. Talk about random! Nevertheless, most people who complained about it will probably tune in anyway. The same thing happens with the current Real Housewives shows that may be falling short.

One show that continually comes through is Below Deck. Its successor Below Deck Mediterranean is an equally compelling show. And now, the Below Deck franchise is expanding with a third show on the network.

Captain Sandy Yawn Below Deck Meditattanean

Last night’s season finale of Below Deck Mediterranean was a tale of too little, too late backhanded compliments. I still think we need a reunion (and I’m super curious about the real reason that’s not happening, but unfortunately I’m not the one in charge over at Bravo) because one of the biggest questions I want answered is why Captain Sandy Yawn turned suddenly on Hannah Ferrier in the last gasps of the season.

Was it just an amalgamation of so many lazy moments that built up for Sandy? Was Sandy tired of feeling like Hannah wasn’t hearing her demands? Was Sandy influenced by Ben Robinson‘s opinion of Hannah?

But, seriously, why is Sandy – on the last day, of the last charter – upset that table is not set at 5am? Meanwhile the deck crew is just twiddling their thumbs. They put the slide up, they take the slide down, you do the jet ski pokey and you shake your whizz all around… Like what guest is going to wake up, and before they’ve had coffee, decide to take a brisk jet ski ride or slip down the slide?

Below Deck Mediterranean Joao Franco Captain Sandy Yawn

Tonight we say goodbye to Below Deck Mediterranean. Since there is no reunion for season 4 this is likely the last time we’ll ever see this crew on our TV!

I have my predictions about who will be returning next season (a Mila/June redemption tour, anyone?!) and whose ship has sailed off into the sunset (Colin Macy-O’Toole). But, overall I’ve enjoyed this season and have a real soft spot for this cast! 

Hannah Ferrier Below Deck Mediterranean

It’s the final charter of the charter season which means we’re almost at the end of the rope for Below Deck Mediterranean. The last charter is a bunch of financial guys from New Jersey or Cali or someplace that breeds tools like it does venereal disease and inflation.

The primary is actually named Randy Madrid. Which is a name no one actually has. It’s a stripper name.  Or what somebody changes their name to when escaping their criminal past or trailer park childhood. Basically, I expect Season 2 of Dirty John to be about someone named “Randy Mardid” who has 6 fake passports and a couple of baby mamas down in Idaho and Louisiana, and drives a mysterious Lamborghini to his computer job in the McDonald’s lobby. Which coincidentally is also where Colin Macy-O’Toole takes his dates.

Hannah Ferrier Below Deck Mediterranean

On tonight’s Below Deck Mediterranean the final charter guests board the Sirocco for a lovely adventure of fun, sun, and relaxation. Well, that’s what’s supposed to happen anyway…

The last charter means that we’re almost at the end of this momentous season of Below Deck Med. And since there won’t be a reunion (WHY? Did Bravo ever offer a reason? I have my theories…) it looks like next week is actually the finale. 

Joao Franco Below Deck Mediterranean

Can you believe we are coming to the end of the Below Deck Mediterranean charter season? What a season it has been! Not only have we been treated to the beautiful vistas of the South of France, we have been treated to some beautiful drama from the crew and the guests.

Last season, chief stew Hannah Ferrier was the Queen of Boat Drama, mooning over bosun Conrad Empson. Hannah was freqeuntly derelict in her job duties, taking smoke breaks galore–and even took to her bed for a day with a bad case of Mediterranean Love Sickness. Try that with your boss and see what happens! This season, Hannah has seemed more committed to her job, boldly announcing at the start of the season, “I feel like this charter season my job is my number one priority.” Do Hannah’s crewmates think she has lived up to her lofty new employee performance goal?

Below Deck Mediterranean Recap: The White Gloves Are Off

Not a day goes by on Below Deck Mediterranean without kitchen issues, bad weather and Captain Sandy Yawn throwing a “Sandtrum” – aka, a Sandy tantrum – about something, then getting over it 2 seconds later to direct her wrath at someone else.

Sandy has 2 speeds: hugs and snugs – I love you like bananas, ice cream, and motor yacht docking –  or screams and yells. After a season of flying under the radar, Joao Franco and Hannah Ferrier both finally found themselves in Sandy’s crosshairs. Meanwhile, Travis Michalzik got all the love a Sandy can offer. You know it’s the end of the season when the chief stew and the bosun are in trouble!

High winds are rocking the Mediterranean as fall approaches, which is why it’s a bad idea to book your motor yacht vacation during discount season – especially if you’re prone to seasickness as guest Deana is. She’s literally crawling on the floor, moaning like her entrails are being ripped out. Hannah escorts her upstairs and gently rubs the inside of her wrists to help regain equilibrium. It’s not quite a taint, but Hannah jokes that she assumed her hand job days are over. Are they ever? Especially if one hopes to net a 65-year-old millionaire!

.Hannah Ferrier Below Deck Mediterranean

As the charter season comes to an end on Below Deck Mediterranean tensions are high as fatigue and apathy sets in, causing Captain Sandy Yawn to yell at Hannah Ferrier for being lazy.

Hannah has spent all season bragging about her dream team of stews, whom she gets along with so well. Unfortunately, Hannah is doing too much of being a friend and not enough being a leader.

Captain Sandy has noticed the quality slipping. Especially compared to the lengths chef Ben Robinson is going to impress the guests at their White Party final supper.