The crown is heavy dahlings – so let’s just leave it where it belongs. Lisa Vanderpump may no longer be a cast member on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills but she’ll always be queen of that show (sorry, Kyle Richards). Lisa walked away after 9 seasons on the show because of puppy-gate, crappy friends, and two real-life losses. Her brother passed away, as we saw on the show, and nine months later her mother, Jean Vanderpump, passed away at 84. She clearly has a lot going on and made the right decision to stay away from the manufactured drama. Besides, she’s better on Vanderpump Rules, where there’s no doubt about who’s boss.
The only good news about RHOBH after Lisa’s exit is that Bravo was forced to shake-up the cast. Sutton Stracke and Garcelle Beauvais have been announced as new housewives. It’s about time Bravo took concrete steps to diversify this show. Perhaps it took LVP’s exit to rethink the direction of the show. Either way, it took a lot for LVP to walk away, and friends of hers have apparently been telling her to leave for years. Now people in her life have been noticing a positive change in Lisa since her departure.
If I didn’t already know that Bille Lee had quit Vanderpump Rules, I would have thought she was a major player in the upcoming season. She has been all over social media as of late. Billie dished about her relationship with Lisa Vanderpump’s son, Max Todd. Then she announced that she is ready to have a baby. Is there anyone on the show, besides Ariana Madix, who doesn’t want to have a baby?
One of the main reasons Billie decided to leave the show was because she felt like she was bullied. Last season, Lala Kent went mental on Billie during her brunch event, and Katie Maloney left her out of the planning for SUR’s Girls Night Out. And now Jax Taylor is in the mix with some choice words of his own for Billie.
Billie Lee was the first trans cast member on Vanderpump Rules. And, honestly, despite the hours I have spend watching, reading about, and writing about Vanderpump Rules, that’s about all I know about her. The past couple of seasons, she was just kind of… there. And she was only “there” sometimes. She definitely wasn’t “there” for Katie Maloney-Schwartz’s Girls Night Out Party or Jax Taylor and Brittany Cartwright’s wedding!
And she won’t be “there” for anything anymore, because she
was fired for being super boring quit to focus on her anti-bullying campaign. Now that Billie has quit the show, she seems to be hitting all the media outlets. I guess she’s trying to get publicity for her “new projects?” Girl, make that 15 minutes last as long as you can!
Love him or hate him, Vanderpump Rules James Kennedy has every right being on the show that made him famous. At least according to him.
He’s hanging on to Pump Rules relevancy by a thread but, much like an unwanted guest, he’s not about to leave of his own accord.
Whew – we have crossed the finish line with season 7 of Vanderpump Rules and I am here to report that this reunion did not need to be 3 parts. There – recap done!
OK, kidding. I actually felt there were some illuminating moments. Like the glimpse of Katie Maloney‘s hubris. Wowee-wow-WOW. Katie literally always sees herself as the victim. She blames James Kennedy for the internet hating her but the internet rightfully hated Katie long before her antics this season! As Tom 1 never really got a chance to say courtesy of James’ interrupitis – a germ passed from Kristen Doute – Katie has been a rancid bottle of ranch dressing since season 1. Katie’s OWN putrid behavior is the reason the Twitterverse rails on her – it has nothing to do with James or her weight (or her husband’s manhood – how is that not also body shaming?). Let’s just say Katie is giving marriage, ranch dressing, the internet, and humanity a bad name. Oh, and also clothing.
I’m having a visceral reaction to part 2 of the Vanderpump Rules reunion. It’s like Lord Of The Flies. James Kennedy is the pig they’re chasing across the island of the doomed until somebody, (probably Tom 2 if we’re being honest) winds up dismembered. Remember when this show was so fun?!
What I’ve come to realize is that these people – chiefly Katie Maloney, Jax Taylor, and Kristen Doute – live in an echo chamber of their own delusions. They can’t learn from experiences because they’ve blocked all the dissenting voices. Instead, they are deafened by the vortex of praise they offer each other. James isn’t even allowed to speak without Kristen cutting him off and screaming him down with some accusation or insult. Andy Cohen wonders why James so angry. Lisa Vanderpump decides it’s because James had a drink at lunch. Or maybe it’s as James said: so many people yelling at him constantly that he can’t breathe.
Last night was the Met Gala and also someone was thrown out of a PTA meeting at my kids’ school when things erupted into a full-on screaming match. Fittingly, it was also part 1 of Vanderpump Rules reunion – so yeah, busy night!
Also as if trying to straddle two events, like she straddles two worlds on Vanderpump Rules, Raquel Leviss‘s reunion dress was the very definition of the Met Gala theme “Camp,” boasting uber-exaggerated shoulders accented by a full duvet of ruffles. It was like a super amped up version of an Alice In Wonderland dress. I loved it. It was almost a perfect representation for the ridiculousness of this show. Raquel came to make a statement that she is here to stay.
Once upon a time, in a land far, far away a foolish princess sat in her WeHo walkup, and pledged her love to Jax Taylor, a pile of mashed potatoes that sometimes took on human-esque features and pretended to have a heart, but mostly just oozed brown puss. This princess of purgatory is Brittany Cartwright and on last night’s Vanderpump Rules she had an engagement party
This party seemed like it was supposed to be a wedding, until producers decided to drag out the drama by turning it into an engagement party last minute. Like they expected a huge blowout where Brittany’s dad confronted her about what an insipid ass Jax is. Or Jax and the Toms got in a fight with Brittany’s brothers. Instead, the biggest drama was Scheana Marie crying in a corner because Adam Spott rejected her adopt-a-penguin apology gift.
Also Ariana Madix nervously confronted Lisa Vanderpump‘s about treating the Toms like grownups because then, like, maybe they might, like, act, like, one. Or Tom 1 will at least.