After Shannon holds up dinner for hours and hours with a crying whining meltdown on the beach (I hope she didn't get sand in her eyes), over her marital discord, she and David agree to try and get along on the trip if David would agree to switch to organic tequila. Of course, in secret, David called the authorities and started the process for a 5150 psychiatric hold for Shannon. Then he chugged his tequila – and suddenly all Brooks Ayers' words of Hallmark wisdom (seriously how many Lifetime Movies does this guy watch?!) made sense. Brooks toasted to forgetting the past because we know he wants errrryone to forget his and they all headed to Andeles, Vicki's Mecca.
Last night on Ladies of London new allegiances were formed while old ones frayed. Showergate continued. And Noelle Reno was somehow in the middle of all of it. Just the way she likes it.
And we’re back in Mapperton. It’s the morning after the Bambi dinner. Caroline Stanbury, Juliet Angus, and Marissa Hermer convene in Noelle’s room at the Lodge. Juliet reports that Caprice Bourret has already checked out. The other three are surprised. Caroline thinks it’s due to her and her new friendships with the American women. She can’t help it if they think she’s fab, Caprice. Juliet starts bagging on Caprice (and Brits in general), but Marissa doesn’t want to take sides. She thinks Caprice left early because of her pregnancy. Juliet claims she was the nicest person ever when she was pregnant. Marissa wishes she would have known her back then. Boom. Awkward silence.
Love & Hip Hop: Atlanta was at the top of its game last night. From Benzino acknowledging that he’s a bit neck deprived to a fight that we didn’t get to see, peppered with some of the best one-liners we’ve heard in a while. It was awesome.
The episode starts with Kalennaand Ashley tearing it up at the strip club. Of course it does. Kalenna has been shirking her recording duties, but Ashley’s getting super possessive about Kalenna focusing on anything other than her. Ashley has even stolen Kalenna’s phone so her husband can’t contact her. When Ashley finally allows Kalenna to call Tony, she’s over their fun times. Kalenna needs to get back in the studio. Also focusing on her career is Tammy Rivera who is hosting a fashion presentation to celebrate the launch of her new clothing line. Both Rasheeda Frost and KarlieRedd are in attendance, and WakaFlocka Flame couldn’t be more proud of his fiancee. I so wish he got more air time! While we aren’t treated to many of her pieces, what I see I really like. Tammy even agrees to elope with Waka instead of having a big wedding.
On last night's episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashiansthings begin at Kris Jenner's house with the ever adorable Mason announcing he is going to kick his Aunty KoKo's butt at sword fighting. Can I just say, if this show had more Mason and less kartrashian fakeness and orchestrated storylines I think this show would become more likeable. Mason is adorable and the family is equally adorable when they are with him.
Bruce Jenner,Scott Disick and Mason go on a man date. Bruce is still enjoying his hot and steamy love affair with Malibu. I don't think it's Malibu so much as it is being free from Kris Jenner. Scott wants to watch Bruce fly one of his toy helicopters. Bruce believes you shouldn't be a spectator in life and that you learn more from doing. Scott is all for it. #WordsOfWisdomByBruce
On a different note, Bruce asks Scott how he is doing since the sudden and tragic loss of both his parents. Scott reveals he can't believe this is his life now and he sometimes forgets they are gone. He even tries to call them sometimes without realizing no one will ever answer. My heart breaks for Scott. I hope Scott is comfortable with talking about his feelings on camera and this isn't the Kardashians abusing a storyline, because his pain and sadness is raw and real. To make a bad scene worse, Bruce tells Scott he is kind of stuck with them – family wise.
Last night was the finale of Kandi's Wedding. Of all of Bravo's weddings, this one may have been my favorite. It was really unique, the performances and venue were really fabulous, plus Kandi Burruss and Todd Tucker seem to be genuinely and madly in love in a really sincere way. Am I crazy?
Before all the happiness, we have to wrap up last week's melodrama! With the prenup still unresolved, Todd bails on the rehearsal dinner but leaves his mommy Sharon there, alone, to fend for herself among the wolves. Or at the very least – wolf: Mama Joyce. Kandi and Todd have a fraught conversation about why he won't sign. Todd insists he doesn't care about money, but Kandi argues that if that's true he would sign. It's unfortunate that she's letting her 'Mama Joyce' show and arguing about leaving her husband something in her will if she dies – the night before her wedding.
Oh y'all. Last night's Sister Wives was the vacation from hell! Can you imagine trekking halfway across the United States with Kody Brown at the helm of your RV? Would you rather ride shotgun if Meri or Robyn were driving? Even Janelle and Christine seemed to be a bit weary about the two RVs and a twelve passenger van. All of this chaos to meet some Christian polygamists. The teenagers are upset about missing spring break with their friends, and Kody is going from house to house trying to pack his stuff. Before heading out of town, Kody's hair leads a business meeting for My Sister Wives' Closet. Robyn is irritated that the investors have yet to fund their business. It's been eight weeks since they were promised the money. What's the hold up? How are they going to pay to rent the RVs? Everyone seems to be dreading this vacation. Even Kody admits to feeling anxious.
Somehow, Kody has convinced his niece Cindy to join the crew–and drive! Is she being punished for something? Meri will also be behind the wheel. Kody is believes his teenagers are going to make or break the trip. The responsible college aged kids are off the hook and won't be traveling with the family. Kody is worried. Without Mariah, Aspyn, Mykelti, and Logan, who will actually watch the younger kids? Christine joins him in his concern. Is she going to have to watch her younger kids now? The family is only an hour behind schedule as Kody barks orders at children who aren't listening to a word he says. I'm getting stressed out by this trip already and they haven't even left the cul-de-sac compound yet!
Sam DeBianchi is struggling to unload Gil Dezer's penthouse because every single agent in all of Miami (and in some cases the world) is shouting like a Greek Chorus that it's overpriced. Sam finally seeks advice from Chris Leavitt about what to do. Chris takes Sam to "kangoo", ala running around in moon shoes. It reminded me of something I'd see on Spaceballs. Unfortunately Sam's bouncing boobs were even distracting the gay guy. (Seriously who doesn't wear a sports bra to work out?!)!
Chris advises Sam to confront Gil and her co-lister Rachel about the need for a price reduction and if it doesn't work out, withdraw from the listing. Sam explains that Gil is basically delusional – comparing his out-dated penthouse to what's being built now in terms of value. This is so weird to me – this Gil is supposed to be a famous real estate developer but he's so clueless about pricing his own property and how the market works?
This episode kicks off with the girls hanging out by the pool and having some drinks. I love how they each have their own unique styles. They look really cute! Elena busts out with a question about her bust. She asks Briana if she should get implants before or after she has children. Briana got hers after she had her daughter and states she has no feeling in them. Elena gives them a quick test run. Terra is bored with the boob talk, and changes the subject to what else, but herself. She has plans to be a breakout music artist and has invested a lot of money into an upcoming music video she’s going to make. She wants all the girls to be in it. Of course Christy isn’t interested because of their previous beef and Elena is on the fence, as she’s worried the video might be tacky. To be fair, the song is all about booty dancing.. there’s a slight chance for tackiness!