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Kathy Wakile


Last night’s episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey was all about Jesus’ Birthday and in the spirit of Christmas everyone got along except for the notorious Kim G. – who really is incapable of getting along with anyone so she got thrown out of Jesus’ Party by the Manzo’s – who don’t let no body mess with their family.

Things pick up where they left off at Jesus’ birthday party. Melissa lets Teresa know she “got that bitch outta there” meaning Monica Chacone, who was Kim G. ’s plus one for about five minutes until Melissa escorted her politely to the door. Teresa gives her brother and SIL props for handling it well, BUT she wants to know why Kim G. was invited in the first place? Melissa says Kim is harmless which ummm…. What?! Please re-watch season 2, Melissa! However, Melissa calls a spade a spade when she describes that Kim G. and Teresa are eerily similar – in fact, so similar they may be “secret sisters.”

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We are midway through the 3rd season of the Real Housewives of New Jersey so what better time to bring you an all new before they were famous post! You can click here for the first edition!

To the left is an old school shot of Teresa Giudice in what looks to be a prom gown dress, and on the right is Teresa’s sister-in-law Melissa Gorga during her cheerleading days!

More awesome shots below of a younger Caroline Manzo, a big haired Kathy Wakile, and Jacqueline Laurita during her youth! Pics via Bravotv.com. Enjoy!

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On last night’s episode of The Real Housewives of New Jersey it’s a very special holiday – Trashymas! I’m sure everyone got many, many lumps of coal. Jacqueline got one in the form of Ashely, Teresa received one in the form of Kim G, Melissa and Kathy received one in the form of Teresa, and The Caroline – well, she got diamonds. Lucky girl.

At the Giudices, they are decorating the hugest Christmas tree ever, but sadly it’s not made of money. Teresa wants us to know that because of the bankruptcy they only got a tree decorated in semi-precious metal and not the one made entirely of gold. D’ya hear that bankruptcy judge – they’re cutting back. If cutting back means driving a Benz and wearing Louboutins then I can only hope to cut back some day! Teresa also wants us to know that all she wants for Christmas is for Melissa’s bad energy to go away. ‘Cause, it gives her a headache.

Melissa is not happy because she just wants an authentic smelling tree for Christmas AND Jesus’ Birthday (which are NOT one and the same, apparently) as she is throwing Jesus like the best birthday party ever. Joey and Melissa discuss their concerns about Jr. Mafia not mixing well with others at their party since he is like totally responsible for the Christening incident. Uh huh. Joey Giudice totally caused the entire thing. Joey G-to-the-Orga and Teresa and Melissa and her sisters had nothing to do with it. Nothing. At. All. Uh huh. We learn Melissa’s hoping to be cast next season sister, Lyssa claims Joe G-to-the-Iudice’s mother punched her in the face at said Christening. Is that where Joe gets it from? Melissa makes it clear NOTHING is going to ruin Jesus’ party!

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On last night’s episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey, it’s Merry Jersey-mas! Jacqueline hosts another Gorgadice Reunion, Teresa gets rowdy in court, Melissa gets a record contract, The Caroline‘s daughter has some issues letting go, and Kathy makes more plans to open a restaurant.

Things start out with preparations for Jacqueline’s holiday party/Gorgadice reunion. In the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard Ashley (yes ASHLEY!) counsels Jacqueline to stay out of Gorgadice drama. Um… can someone please counsel Ashley on how her orange spray tan is atrocious? Please, someone? She looks like a Snork with her bright orange face and high ponytail.

At the Manzo’s Santa is bringing patience and cheer and bitchy sisters. Poor Lauren is left out of Manzo sibling bonding since the boys have moved out. Farewell Ham Game! Oh, Lauren – she has officially become The Caroline, Jr – storming around and telling everyone what to do. Albie says one positive about living with Greg is that Greg won’t end up dating Lauren… Oh, really? Is it because he may end up dating Albie? I kid, I kid… After discovering a mouse has eaten the plastic Santa, the Manzos play Mariah Carey’s Christmas album, buy two all-feather Christmas trees, call Cher and Chris March and invite them to their annual Christmas drag show starring Joey G-to- the-Orga! Actually I made that last part up, but wouldn’t it be a lot more fun than watching the Manzos bicker about nothing again?!

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On last night’s episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey, Teresa and Melissa vow to put the past behind them but just can’t, Jacqueline has a few too many red wines, Caroline gets her panties in a bunch and isn’t any fun, Kathy wants to open a restaurant, and Teresa invites her Made For TV Family to The Catskills for some old fashioned gun shootin, four-wheelin, TMI sex talk,wine-guzzling fun! Did I mention the TMI sex talk?

Ending where things left off last week, Melissa and Teresa are disagreeing about the Gorga Family Feud. Melissa comes out swinging by essentially blaming Teresa for the “disgusting” Christening debacle and insisting Teresa is never around and never sees their kids. Seriously. And suddenly it becomes all about the Joes and which Joe owes more money to which creditors. In the tit for tat convo, Teresa brings up Joe owing money to some plumbers and Melissa responds with a savage blow when she declares that Jr. Mafia Joe borrowed money from Non-Juicy, but when her hubby tried to collect on his debts Joe told Joe: “If you want your money sue me!” Melissa is confused and wants to know why her fellow shopaholic housewife just can’t skip a pair of Manolos to pay back the loan: “just pay me the $1000 – your wife is wearing more than that on her feet!” Duh!

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On last night’s episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey it was all about Family Feuds (which sadly did not include the game show). Teresa behaves appropriately, Kathy just wants to be liked, The Caroline discovered a new medium for interfering in people’s lives, and Jacqueline helped broker the Gorga Peace Treaty.

The episode started out with The Caroline preparing for her big radio debut by using her friend Dolores to act as a Teresa-imposter so she can “practice” administering advice for “Caroline Rules” her new show on New Jersey 101.5. For some reason The Caroline is nervous about being her bossy self in public, despite spending a couple seasons on a reality show doing just that! Caroline brings up Teresa’s bankruptcy judgment and pending auction – describing that her friend has a lot on her plate and things are out of control in her life.

In the Gorga household, Alexis 2.0 Jersey Jesus Midge (Barbie’s brunette friend!) is thanking Jesus that peace is being made today between Teresa and Non-Juicy Joe, as she helps her husband untuck his shirt just so to avoid looking messy. Meanwhile in Foreclosed Marble Mansion-Land (aka the Giudice residence) Teresa is also getting ready and announces that Joe needs to do something about Melissa because she is leading their family down a crooked road with all of her poison! Ummm… I thought poison was something used to make babies according to Joe Gorga? Teresa declares: “A wife makes it or a wife breaks it” and therefore it is Joe’s responsibility to put Melissa in check! Is it also Jr Mafia’s responsibility to put Teresa in check – because frankly I don’t think that’s possible (see: Bankruptcy spending.) After adjusting his cross and refolding his letter from Teresa, Joe is off to demand an apology from his sister, the villainess.

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Last night’s episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey was all about the role of the mother and life’s ever changing directions. Melissa struggles with balancing future pop-stardom with Gorga/Giudice drama, The Caroline still (always and forever) has empty-nest syndrome, Jacqueline is forced into buying the undeserving Ashley a car, Kathy is confused about what show she is on as she tries to educate her children and the public, and Teresa,well she dressed her daughters in matching gold leather vests and attempted to repair her family relations in another round of Gorga vs. Gorga. Can we just get to the C-Celebrity death match already and put this thing to rest?

Things begin at the Gorga household (which is decorated like a funeral home) where Melissa randomly bursts into a very ungraceful version of “Amazing Grace” prompting her husband and soon-to-be manager (spouse-ager? husband-ager?) to exclaim that she sounds like she is coming out of a radio! Cue home movies of a young Melissa aka “future supa star” performing. Melissa explains it was her father who wanted to make her a star – so that explains how she started chasing cameras! Melissa and Non-Juicy Joe come up with a plan – he will become her father (creepy! I am assuming he meant support her as her father did?) and help her pursue her dream! She will be a part-time mommy/part-time pop star! I’m envisioning Jazz Hands here as I type this.

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Last night the Real Housewives of New Jersey was all about giving thanks even if you don’t want to. Teresa is thankful her friends still put up with her after all her drama, Jacqueline is thankful that Ashley finally learned how to operate a vacuum cleaner, Caroline is thankful Vito hasn’t proposed so Lauren won’t be leaving her, Melissa is thankful that she has Non-Juicy (?) and Kathy is thankful she can bake. And if I were friends with Kathy, I would be thankful for that too.

The episode started out with Melissa and Non-Juicy grocery shopping for Thanksgiving where Melissa grabs some butt that isn’t Joe’s! Melissa spends the entire shopping trip whining at Non-Juicy until I just zoned out and pretended I was watching Extreme Couponing. Meanwhile at Kathy’s house more yummy cooking is happening since she is making all the deserts for the Gorga-giving celebration. Ruining a perfectly delicious scene is talk of Teresa and Non-Juicy’s “sibling rivalry.” Kathy’s hubby Rich mentions that if Teresa shows up at Gorga-giving something interesting might happen to prevent food coma like another BRAWL! Oh Rich, don’t give the Bravo editors any ideas… Kathy is so distracted by all the Teresa talk she burns some pies and freaks out.

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