Shannon Beador is on a rampage and she is savagely ripping the meat from the bones of Real Housewives Of Orange County. Any housewife who dares try to get in Shannon’s way better come prepared with white gloves to treat her fragile ego, and proper cutlery to carve though the drama. Shannon has bared her soul, her heart, and now her midriff on this show and she has worked too hard recapturing David to watch it all get flushed down the toilet sitting in her relationship corner, dammit!
And yes, there’s a toilet in Shannon’s relationship corner according to her Feng Shui expert! I think that’s Vicki Gunvalson‘s fault though. After all, Vicki put Shannon’s relationship in the crapper with her lies about David. Now all Shannon’s relationships are draining away (even the relationships she hasn’t formed yet). Shannon’s relationship with vodka seems in tact, though.
Washing up on the shores of the California beaches, amid the shells and driftwood, is the rubble of last season’s Real Housewives Of Orange County. Littering the sands with shards of shattered friendships, filthy accusations, and broken down dignities; a bent halo, some empty vodka and champs bottles, and Shannon Beador‘s former self, now soaked and waterlogged by the hours of tears she’s spilled over the terrible lies Vicki Gunvalson told. The fate of the world, and the Orange County coastline — along with the safety and health of Briana’s children – all rests in Vicki’s handbag! Thankfully she’s not crazy or anything…
So the taglines: let’s start there. What makes Tamra Judge “highly prized”? Or was she just proud of herself for coming up with a rhyme. Hook’d on Phonics worked for her! Vicki’s tagline informs us that she’s not going home, but what she means is that this show is her home, and you are not going to drop any interloping houses on her head! She clicked her ruby slippers together three times and dragged Briana from the land of tornadoes to get here.
So, before we get into the all-new drama, let’s take a trip down memory lane to relive all the craziness from season 11. Maybe a tequila will help refresh things?! And season 11 was full of crashes and burns (literally), boozes and burns (literally), and plenty of rides from hell.
The season opened with Vicki all by herself, and seeking absolution after lying – in some capacity – about what she knew about Brooks Ayers‘ phony cancer scheme. Obviously no one wants to forgive Vicki because it doesn’t seem possible that she totally didn’t realize he was faking a terminal illness for money and attention.
WOO HOO! Real Housewives Of Orange County returns next week and I am peeing my pants Vicki Gunvalson-style with excitement. And as a little sneak peak of what’s to come, Bravo revealed the season 12 taglines for the enormous cast of ladies!
Tamra Judge has made no secret about being abandoned by her eldest daughter Sidney. Tamra has consistently blamed her spiteful ex-husband Simon Barney for the estrangement. However, Tamra finally, happily reunited with her daughter to attend Sidney’s high school graduation. Then she ran straight to social media to post about it, which is part of what drew Tamra and Sidney apart to begin with.
The Real Housewives of Orange County season 12 will continue the trials and tribulations of Bravo’s original Housewives. Old faces are returning in the form of Lydia McLaughlin, pre-plastic surgery Vicki, and Gretchen Rossi(Yes! I know). Some classic Housewives left us when Heather Dubrow decided she’d finally had enough of looking bad by association – at least that’s what she believes made her look bad! #Ireland
Yesterday was Mother’s Day and like all days – and holidays and visits to the doctor or grocery store, or when one buys shoes, or brushes teeth, or drinks tea – our favorite reality stars took to Instagram and twitter to thank their mothers for creating them, or to thank their children for putting up with them.
Above, Ramona Singer shared, “Love being her mother @averysinger.”
Reality Tea is ranking of every, single Housewife from every, single season from almost every Real Housewives franchise. You can find Part 1 of our rankings here. Now we finally return with Part 2 (aka the big ole mush in the middle)!
In Part 1 we mostly covered most Housewives who were either too crazy to be legit, or didn’t make much of an impact, or were just so miscast and off it was painful. Some of them were too nice, or too timid, or not rich enough, or too desperate. If she’s only a Housewife for a season, there’s usually a reason!