Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills returns to Bravo on December 1st. Which is like a week away! It’s no secret that I am so excited – really excited! – and there are many things to anticipate this season. For instance, the almost-absence of one Boozdi “Truth Cannons Blowin’ Up In My Botched Face!” Glanville!
Since it’s Thanksgiving, and we’re all about some Holiday spirit, and the ladies of Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills have so much extra to give, we’re counting down the six reasons we’re thankful the First Ladies Of Diamond Warfare are back.
CONTINUE READING FOR 6 REASONS WE’RE THANKFUL FOR RHOBH!
1. Real Estate Porn — If there’s one thing you can count on from the ladies of Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills it’s fabulous fridges and houses the size of a Super Target. All the better to lose your annoying husband in!
We’ve already gotten a sneak peak of Kyle Richards‘ $1.5 million dollar renovation, but need we remind you, Yolanda Foster is moving – which means a whole new Lemon-Lyme palace to unveil! If we’re lucky we’ll even get to see YoDa house hunting. I bet they use a hover craft to air float from castle in the sky, to castle by the sea.
Plus there are the fabulous parties these ladies throw, which provides us ample opportunity to ogle both their homes and their equally fabulous wardrobes! And new Housewives means new mega-mansions to gawk at! YAY times all their millions.
2. Kyle Without Kim — Since season 1 of Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills, the Twisted Sisters Richards have been a lightening rod for controversy due to their dysfunctional family dynamics.
While it’s a nice reminder that money can’t buy you happiness, sanity, or MY SOBRIETY, I’m excited to watch Kyle without the ever-looming worry of looking out for Kim (and her sobriety (or her Kingsley’s jaws of doom)).
Of course KimKillah will be making an appearance or two, but for the most part Kyle is flying solo this season to focus on family, friends, fashion businesses (Oh heavens no!) and fun. I look forward to a more relaxed, fun-loving Kyle – hopefully “relaxed” doesn’t equal MORE KAFTANS!! Meanwhile, Kim will be praying to some trashcans in the The Valley. #GoddessOfTheLostMarbles
3. Battle Of The Lips — You know what they say: Loose lips sink frienemies!
Taylor Armstrong is back (in a reduced role), but when Taylor comes face-to-face with her lipspiration Lisa Rinna, the tongues start wagging about Yolanda’s Lyme Disease!
It’s too soon to tell if Lipsa and Loony Lips (the original Kiss Of The Krazy on RHOBH) will be bitter enemies or sisters in liplants, but whatever happens I am there for it. All day, every day, and extra lipgloss on Saturdays.
4. The Bitch Isn’t Back — I said it above, and I’ll say it again: THANK YOU JESUS that Brandi will not return (full time anyway)!
For 4 seasons’ Brandi’s “truth cannons” have been firing duds, but blowing up perfectly good lives! It was distressing to watch and also disheartening. This season Bravo broke the bad habit and reduced Brandi to an occasional guest appearance or two (which is too many for me!). I anticipate that in the brief moments Boozdi appears she’ll be doing everything extra – and then some! – to cause drama, but at least we know her moments are fleeting.
Let’s hope that without Brandi, the class level of the BH reaches the diamond standard again. An added bonus: Camille Grammer is also back, and she ain’t about no pernicious bitches. I am so thrilled to see a Camille Grammer shoulder shrug and micro-sneer. .Gif that for life!
5. New Faces — With Kim and Brandi leased Audi 5000, Bravo is introducing us to some fresh faces. Of several varieties.
First the legit kind, as in new Housewives Kathryn Edwards and Erika Jayne. And then of the plastic, altered kind. Come on – you know you’re excited to see who’s unveiling their latest plastic surgery, Botox, and filler routine but trying to pass it off as facials and drinking more water. “I’m just aging in reverse, the water in Beverly Hills is THAT good!” (Said no believable Housewife ever!)
I so cannot wait to see what Kathryn and Erika bring to the dinner table. It better be a big ole Birkin filled with awesome soundbites and juicy drama!
6. Eileen — ‘Nuff said. Eileen Davidson is my favorite Housewife, like, ever, of all times!
Bravo better not f–k with my Eileen and try to make her a villain. Know This: There will be vicious backlash! (Word to wise editors – remember that season you tried to checkmate Lisa Vanderpump? MmmmmHmmmmm).
Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills‘ Emmy Award-winning voice of reason is my Spirit Housewife and I am giddy with anticipation at more Eileen on my television screen.
Below some of the greatest Eileen moments of last season.
She's Good At The Kiss & A Slap!
Right away Eileen saw through Brandi's attention-seeking behavior - and even called her a "creepy fan" but she always handled her with a detached dignity that was admirable.
She Can Turn A Frown Upside Down!
Despite all the drama, Eileen always tried to have a good time! She was all about confronting the drama directly, then moving on. Too bad her co-stars weren't with her...
How DARE YOU?!
Best. Line. Ever. Kim calls Eileen a beast. Eileen's reaction, "How dare you?"
Baptism By Booze
Even when Brandi threw wine in Eileen's face, she handled it classily. She left. She never forgot, but she was never rude to Brandi either. I love that Eileen killed her with kindness, honestly, and detachment, but never got too close or too rude.
House Guests From Hell
When Brandi, Kyle, and Kim ruined poker night, Eileen let them squabble on the driveway like feral cats while she calmly called the limo as she sipped her glass of wine. Next time I imagine she'll call Animal Control.
Stranger At the Pentagon
Despite being an A-list soap actress and an Emmy winner, Eileen was never arrogant or egotistical. She happily starred in an promoted a friend's B Movie and without irony invited the ladies to a premier in the mall. The refreshments may have only been hot dogs, but Eileen's attitude was truly refreshing!
TELL US – WHY ARE YOU THANKFUL FOR REAL HOUSEWIVES OF BEVERLY HILLS’ RETURN?
[Main Photo Credit: Michael Larsen/Andrew Eccles/Bravo, All other photo credits Bravo & Instagram]