The Twisted Sicksters Richards are still stranded in Palm Desert after the histrionic horrors of YOU STOLE MY HOUSE! Kim Richards insists she’s grown-up and is waiting for Kyle Richards to treat her like the “healthy, sober older sister who can take care of her life.” Except stupid Kyle is all Kim can’t even tell a vibrator from a lipstick and a Tuesday from a toadstool and God! Do I have to do everything, even cook eggs?! Man, if I were Kyle I would have put Ex-lax in the bitch’s eggs!
Yeah, they ate eggs instead of dealing with the destruction of the night before when Kim hoarsely screeched at Kyle to give back her house right. now. Or ELSE healthy big sober super sister Kim was going to destroy her with her inventive memory and her super weapon: the gossiping drunken lips of Boozdi, a super-villain who will swoop down from the valley with lies of attrition. Kyle meekly says she’s surprised Kim stayed after what happened, Kim just eats and plots to set a bag of Kingsley’s dog poop on fire and throw it on the grill.
Andy opens by asking Brandi and Mike if they know each other. “He just tried to have sex with me in the back,” Brandi spouts off. Kicking the show off with class, naturally. Mike says “you and Golnesa would say yes.”
Things are definitely not any better between Brandi and Kyle Richards. Brandi says that she ran into Kyle at Sephora in NYC earlier in the day (she’s a guest on WWHL tomorrow night) and Kyle ran out of the store. “I had to get my lashes, I had to stay.” She says they didn’t speak at all.
In a series of now deleted tweets, Lisa questioned why Kim, who is at the center of all the drama this season, is the only one who never writes her Bravo blogs. According to Lisa, writing while drunk is really, really hard. Tell that to Brandi!
Last night Lisa was asked why Bravo doesn’t make all the Housewives write blogs. “Isn’t it part of the housewives contracts,” the tweet inquired. Lipsa, who wants us to know no to believe anything unless we hear it from her lips responded, “#exactly.”
We all remember that incredibly hard to watch limousine ride on the season finale of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills when Kim Richards accused her sister Kyle of stealing her house and then Kyle outed Kim as an alcoholic. It was so awkward, and we got round two on the latest episode in Kyle’s very, very brown new home. Seriously, it was a lot of brick!
After Kim once again accused Kyle of unfairly cheating her out of her portion of their mother’s Palm Desert home, Kyle decided it was time to defend herself. She explains some of the background on selling the house and updates viewers on where the sisters’ relationship currently stands. It doesn’t sound good.
Lisa said she knew Kyle was “in need of someone to talk to” about Kim.
“I am just as sick of this topic as all of you are,” shared Lisa, “but at this point, it was quite evident to me that Kim’s “best friend” had decided to fill her in on the conversation we had over lunch but conveniently left out her entire role in the conversation. One would assume that Brandi realized she’d spoken of Kim in a way that would upset her, so she lumped the whole conversation on me. Brandi needed me to be the bad guy in order to keep Kim from being mad at her, too.”