Last night on Real Housewives of Miami, things took a turn for the dour. Lets just say there were a lot of tears and too few drunken antics, but sometimes a little Housewives Xanax is needed after all the insanity!
Things begin with Joanna Krupa getting her charity on and thankfully she's not exposing her pubes to raise awareness this time. This time, she's competing in a charity volleyball game. Joanna + bikini = $$. Karent Sierra and Lisa Hochstein are cheering her on – and curiously absent is Romain Zago.
A somber Joanna fills them in on the grim reality post boobnight bitchslap. Although Romain and Joanna are still technically living together they barely speak and he works overtime to avoid her.
Joanna takes to the court and is surprisingly good. For some odd reason I was expecting it to be a gobsmackingly appalling performance. And after the match Romain arrives to show his better late than never version of support. They decide to go have a chat because I mean who doesn't want to have a personal and heartfelt conversation about their relationship in public, at a sporting event?
Gary Brown, the victim, decided to press charges and due to the severity of the act it was promoted from a misdemeanor to a 3rd Degree Felony. Last week Peter, 20, decided to plead "Not Guilty," reports CBSMiami. Peter did not appear in court, but his attorney entered a written plea and the judge set a court date for November 29th.
If convicted Peter could face up to five years in prison.
Moving on, Karent Sierra has had a difficult time adjusting to her co-stars on Real Housewives of Miami. And her sparkly veneers are cutting everyone the wrong way. Speaking to NBCLatino, Karent confesses she just doesn't care what the other ladies think and she had no intention of being BFF with the entire cast!
She also dishes on her TV/fame aspirations and how Rodolfo went from love of her life to yesterday's news as soon as the Bravo cameras stopped rolling.
Oh my God, just shut up about it already! I enjoy a lingerie party as much as the next gal (false!), but I'm so tired of Joanna Krupa talking about getting slapped by Adriana DeMoura. I'd rather poke out my eye with sharp pencil or read through my Facebook news feed the day after the election. It's all equally painful!
The Real Housewives of Miami star had my support after the initial episode aired, but then I watched her on Watch What Happens Live. At that point I lost whatever respect I had for her, and this is even after I saw the picture of her in a see-through shirt. I mean, who are these people?
Last night on Real Housewives of Miami there were dueling psychics, dueling ladies in formal wear, and um… yeah just a lot of straight up unhappiness. If last week's episode was all the debauchery, hedonism, and human sacrifices of Ancient Rome, last night's episode was the aftermath of war.
It's the day of the annual Blacks Gala and everyone is quite positive no one's nipples will hang out, no one will be thrown into pool Dynasty style, and no one will be doing tequila shots or getting slapped in the face. Oh, no instead they'll be milling around in couture gowns and spending $14,000 bidding on an evening at the Playboy Mansion. The only thing Fembot Fakenstein's boobgerie slapfest has in common with the Black Gala is some of the attendees – and that includes Joe "Cameratime" Francis. Doesn't he have some checks to be writing to Steve Wynn? $40 Million of them to be exact.
In preparation for the gala, Lea Black is rushing around clutching a bright pink Birkin as if it's an extra appendage. A third arm that is merely a formality and is crap at the useful things like moving tables and directing quack psychics on how to turn glass into music and peace.
In addition to be a Housewife (and housewife), Lea is also an author with her first novel coming soon, a serious philanthropist, and a skin care maven. Lea is frank, funny, and exactly as she comes across on the show – meaning she's very 'take me as I am' and very fun.
An excerpt from our conversation is below.
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Together the two ladies partied at the Bowery Hotel while waiting out the storm – and lucky for them they had some run-ins with celebrities Denise Richards and and Michelle Rodriguez (of course Karent tweeted about it and posted a ton of photos!) The Real Housewives of Miami stars spent their downtime posting zillions of pictures of their forced slumberparty and now claim they are "closer than ever." Below are photos of the ladies hunkered down and braving #Sandy.