Frank Catania

Had you been waiting with bated breath like me for last night’s episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey? All week I pondered who would prevail in the battle of Envy by Melissa Gorga and Jennifer Aydin’s tacky Chanel. Frankly, I wouldn’t put my money on either of them to throw down after Margaret Josephs doused Danielle Staub with Dolores Catania’s wine, but crazier things have happened in Cabo! Also, I appreciate the RHONJ’s producers for giving us a “to be continued” episode last week. What’s that old saying? People in garish houses shouldn’t throw glass? Jennifer gets in Melissa’s face, and Melissa quickly retreats. Dolores steps in to intimidate Jennifer, and Danielle intervenes. No matter how much Danielle hates Dolores, she respects her ability to beat Jennifer’s monkey’s ass lip liner.

Dolores takes a walk to cool off. Margaret confides in Jackie Goldschneider about how disappointed she is in Teresa Giudice’s behavior. She thought they were friends. Why is Teresa condoning Danielle (and subsequently Jennifer’s) abhorrent behavior? Teresa chases down Melissa who is disgusted by her sister-in-law’s loyalty. Dolores approaches to second Melissa’s assertions. Tre is peeved by their statements while Melissa and Dolores find Jackie and Margaret to share what escalated. At the bar, Teresa, Jennifer, and Danielle defend their actions. At least Teresa tries to show Jennifer the error of her ways…sort of.

We know we’re over the work week hump when we get another episode of the Real Housewives of New Jersey! Fresh off placing third in a body-building competition, Teresa Giudice wants to celebrate her feat with some tequila and a girls’ trip. And what better place for tequila and drama than an all expenses paid (by Bravo) getaway to Mexico?

Seriously, what could go wrong? (Ask any of the RHOC ladies…) Unfortunately for Margaret Josephs, she has managed to parlay her feud with Danielle Staub into a threesome of threats with Danielle’s new bestie Jennifer Aydin thanks in big part to necklace-gate. After one too many heated dinners, she even memorializes the demise of her friendships with a toast–right into Danielle’s face. It’s this season’s birthday cake…or table. Take your pick! Oh, and did I mention the camels? The exotic creatures are right at home hanging out with a monkey’s a$$hole.