Miami is where souls go to die on Real Housewives Of New York. People are arrested. People are swept up in tsunami-like rages. And people pose decadently and cluelessly in front of their cabaret posters in the middle of the street.
Last night gave us the full spectrum of why Real Housewives Of New York are the alpha Housewives. One minute people are shaking with sobs, the next they’re shoving their dogs in a home freezer, then putting on thong leotards for a little 80’s throwback workout.
Real Housewives of New York star Tinsley Mortimer’s storyline has been very similar the past couple of seasons. Mainly her desire to have a family and a willing partner to join her. Her tagline this year perfectly summed it up, “Game, set, now I need a match.” Plus, who knew she was also a good tennis player?
Tinsley thought she had found her perfect match when she started dating Carole Radziwill’s friend Scott Kluth. But it didn’t take long to see that the relationship was one sided. Scott was always MIA. When he did show up, Tinsley embarrassed herself by acting like a fan girl. Thankfully, because of the tick tock of Tinsley’s ticking clock (say that three times fast), Tinsley realized it’s time to move on.
*sigh* So many thoughts about last night’s episode of Real Housewives Of New York. SO. MANY. THOUGHTS. And even more questions!
Does Luann de Lesseps deserve the wrath of hungover Housewives? Does air conditioner make Sonja Morgan poof or poop? Does Bethenny Frankel see Luann as her human sounding board – the one person resilient enough to take all the tantrums Bethenny’s mother ignored as she headed out to the clubs or on a date; giving Bethenny free-reign to project all of her childhood emotions.
Also, it occurs to me, that Bethenny probably married her mother and her father in Jason Hoppy, who seems diabolical, but also really disinterested in her melodrama, and Bethenny needs someone to give validity to her hysteria or else she thinks they don’t ‘hear’ her.
The Real Housewives of New York’s Tinsley Mortimer is one of the few Housewives who doesn’t purposely create drama with the other ladies. Sure, Tinsley participates in a little pot stirring when induced by her co-stars, but the drama she creates is usually centered around her own life. Tinsley must not have watched previous episodes before joining the cast three seasons ago–the other women are meant to be the targets-not yourself, Tinsley! Haven’t Ramona Singer or Bethenny Frankel taught you anything?
Tinsley’s self-inflicted drama is usually about her personal life. She has been very open about her desire to start a family, believing her biological time clock is on high alert due to her age. Tinsley is also famous for breaking up and making up with on-again, off-again boyfriend Scott Kluth. Her castmates and advice happy mother Dale Mercer have all told her to move on from Scott and it looks like Tinsley might finally be listening.
This show I tell you. The Real Housewives Of New York ladies know how to do it right. Every episode is like going to an all you can eat buffet.
Only on Real Housewives Of New York can you have a drunken collapse over an argument about cabaret turn into political commentary on the last time Sonja Morgan probably felt relevant. Which flows into competing artists giving out free art and Ramona Singer inviting her ex-husband and new boyfriend to a party, then being forced to admit to making out with her former friend’s ex-husband in front of another friend who also hooked up with this same guy.
Oh, they’ve descended upon the sunshine state again… Shouldn’t Florida have an ordinance keeping the Real Housewives Of New York out?!
In cold New York city Ramona Singer has convinced everyone that vacationing in a fabulous Miami mansion will be just the thing to unify the group after Upstate. Round houses have a way of backing everyone into their own corners. Also Luann de Lesseps is spinning on an axis around her own sun, orbiting her own ego, and declaring that she’s not a diva at. all, so maybe a return to Florida will put things in humbling perspective for her!
Real Housewives of New York star Tinsley Mortimer has been very vocal about her desire to become a mother. Who could ever forget Tinsley trying on wedding dresses with her mother Dale Mercer and FaceTiming her frozen eggs?
Tinsley hoped that she would get the family of her dreams… until she and Scott Kluth broke up. Now, her costars and her mom are putting the pressure on her to make decisions if she wants to have a biological child.
No one’s personal life is off limits when it comes to Real Housewives of New York. Significant others can become a storyline whether they are on camera or not. Like that unfortunate business of Tinsley Mortimer and Scott Kluth. The car he sent over from Chicago spent more time onscreen than its owner. Yet Scott’s name was on everybody’s lips for quite a while.
Dive back far enough into the show’s history and you might stumble upon speculations that Luann de Lesseps had an open marriage with the Count. Bethenny’s Frankel’s relationships may have had gray areas and some castmates were quick to pass judgment.