It’s hard to believe there was so much drama on season 6 of The Real Housewives Of Atlanta. It’s hard to imagine there will BE so much drama on this seventh season of Real Housewives Of Atlanta!
Of course, I cannot wait – I am literally already clutching my wine glass in anticipation. Squeeee! With that being said, let’s recap all the goods from season 6 so we’re reminded afresh of who hates who, what caused what friction. And of course, Mirror, Mirror on the wall – whose the shadiest of them all?!
Kenya Moore was back and had earned her keep! She decimated her friendship with NeNe Leakes by buddying up to Marlo Hampton, who was trying any old thing to get screen time! And it was brawls galore last season – some of those brawls took place in bras, and one of them nearly caused an implant to explode, but they had one thing in common: Krayonce!
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NeNe hosted a “Pajama Party” where she ranted and raved in a negligee at Kenya for being late before a huge fight broke out where Apollo Nida attacked Kenya’s assistant Brandon! Then Kandi got into it with Peter Thomas, Cynthia, and Malorie over allegations that Todd is an “opportunist!”
NeNe invited her friend Mynique Smith to join the cast, but Mynique’s only contribution was lacking of reading comprehension and having the glorious and exalted title of Mrs. Big Homie, i.e. the wife of Chuck Smith!
Phaedra Parks also was accused of being a little bit extra on Team Chuck, Big Homie of the RHOA Housewives. To hear Chuck tell it he was running a harem of ladies all trying to get on his Little Homie (little being the operative word, say the sources). Chuck once dated Kandi Burruss, but accused Phaedra of wanting him desperately. As it turns out – no one wanted Chuck at all, not then, not now because Mynique was never heard from again.
Porsha Stewart got divorced and accused Kordell of being a queen, who put her on a budget, and an abuser. Porsha tried to sneak away on the Underground Railroad during a trip to Savannah but she waited and waited at the train depot outside the Kroger for hours and hours, but the train never came. Oh well! More time to play Candy Crush! Porsha also moved out to the ‘burbs into a massive
soon-to-be-eviction house that gave her plenty of places for her mama to eat pizza – and hopefully it also had a library for her to research African American History. Speaking of which, Porsha probably also thinks Soul Train is an actually locomotive that takes one to church.
Phaedra continued to have issues with Kenya over what may have happened with Apollo – Kenya accused him of cheating, but not with her! An awkward confrontation during the cast trip to Anguilla, where Apollo was spotted salivating over Made In Mexico’s finest derriere! That wasn’t the only cheating drama Kenya was embroiled in – Cynthia’s friend Natalie briefly joined the cast, where Kenya announced that her husband Christopher had been referring to her as his “common-law” wife so he could get some side.
Phaedra definitely had problems with Apollo, who was arrested during filming and indicted for fraud. The fractures in their marriage were clear all over that show. Well, now Phaedra and Kenya have something in common: neither one of them has a huzzzzzzzband.
Kandi planned her wedding to Todd Tucker – amid dealing with the crazy that is Mama Joyce, who reared her ugly head, Exorcist-style. Joyce accused Kandi’s best friend Carmon of having an affair with Todd, because words on the street, ala those willing to blackmail Todd told her so. Right. In Beat-Down at The Bridal Boutique! Lord was Maid of Honor Carmon running and ducking from flying wedge heels straight out Kohl’s cougar department! And by cougar, I mean wild animal who stalks and hunts its prey. Probably should have aired this on the Wildlife Channel, Andy!
Moving along, Kenya got evicted. That happened. Kenya claimed to be dating a mysterious wealthy African. Still waiting on “proof”. Her boyfriends are like school cafeteria Mystery Meat, you just hope it’s something slightly palatable, but you’re really afraid to look. Unfortunately one of the saddest things that happened last year was the death of Kenya’s beloved dog, Velvet.
Cynthia Bailey dealt with fibroids attacking her insides, Peter attacking her bank account, Malorie attacking her marriage, and Peter ‘The Bitch’ and his desires for Peach-dom, trying his hardest to be relevant on this show! Their marriage barely survived sickness (or health!), but alas the wife that writes checks is the one that keeps husbands. Guess Phaedra missed that memo! Sadly, Cynthia also dealt with NeNe attacking her parenting and attacking Peter!
Kenya did NeNe the dubious honor of hosting a charity masquerade ball for NeNe’s charity, Not Our Daughters – without exactly telling NeNe she was the guestess of honor. NeNe was not pleased, and instead of being gracious (a word she needs to find the definition of in Porsha’s library), she was rude, uncouth, and argued with Peter about decorum. That in turn caused the end of NeNe and Cynthia’s friendship because NeNe, naturally thought Peter was taking Krayonce’s side – things blew up during the trip to Anguilla. And the side of right is never with Krayonce!
Well tonight is the premiere of season 7. The ladies of Atlanta are back and lots of drama has not been settled since last season. Phaedra and Apollo prepare for him to go to court, while NeNe leaves Atlanta to star in Zumanity. Cynthia focuses on her businesses, and Kenya is still reeling from her altercation with Porsha at the reunion. Meanwhile Kandi and Todd settle into married life and making babies!
Reality Tea will be live-tweeting the 90 minute season premiere! Make sure to join us. And no, WWHL is not on until 11:30 pm, so the full episode should be RHOA.
TELL US – WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE DRAMA FROM LAST SEASON? AND WHO WAS THE SHADIEST OF THEM ALL?
[Photo Credits: Bravo]