Eva returns from her honeymoon but wedded bliss is super short-lived when she and now-husband Michael Sterling jump right into moving to a new house. Eva previously said they were returning to the City of Atlanta for Michael’s political career, but Marlo has heard a very, very different account of their, erm, accounts! Or lack thereof… Perhaps the Sterlings shouldn’t have been shedding Benjamins for the wedding!?
“I’m not quite sure if I’m invited or not but I’m inviting myself,” shrugs Ramona, arriving at Barbara Kavovit‘s much-anticipated clambake. She believes wine is the salve that soothes all social wounds. So by bringing two bottles of rosé, PLUS a fancy pie, there’s no way she’ll be turned away. Who knew she’d leave with so many party favors.
Teddi Mellencamp Arroyave has, by now, told about 15 renditions of her involvement/non-involvement in DogGate. In each version, she becomes increasingly naive and played for a fool. Also each time one of her versions doesn’t coincide with the revision, the other women conveniently brush it aside and double-down on the narrative that Teddi is the victim. Or Dorit Kemsley is. Really?
For instance tonight Teddi told her therapist she never spoke directly to Lisa about Doggate (Why are we still talking about this?!), then told Dorit and the other women that she was on a three-way call with Lisa and John Sessa which proves LVP is directly involved. Isn’t the whole point of Teddi’s argument that LVP isn’t owning her part and wants to frame Teddi? Well, it sounds like Teddi is doing the same exact thing!
I mean, when you (Teddi) are basing your rejection of a friendship based on said friend’s (LVP) possible collaboration in exposing a really shitty, contract violating, grifting, lying animal mistreating, a-hole, you probably need to reexamine your priorities in life and your version of morality. Just my opinion! But there goes Teddi throwing accountability to the wolves of Erika Girardi, Lisa Rinna, and Dorit. Girl… have fun with that til they turn back on you.
I personally think all Brittany’s sudden health problems are a psychosomatic response to realizing she’s engaged to Jax Taylor!
Other things happened, though. Like I cannot look at Beau Clark without seeing a grubby, truck stop dirtbag. His pasty, grimy pits and flabby arms hanging out of that dirty tank top as he swung around a handle of tequila Stassi Schroeder was bedazzling for Scheana Marie as a peace offering was… well all the karma Stassi has ever deserved. Beau seems sweet and very nice, but he joins the unhygienic mass of menfolk on this show who look like walking staph infections and probably need their own file at the CDC.
Eva’s wedding gown consisted of a 400 foot train (length and width) with these weird insect leg things that propelled out from her bust like rings of Saturn. Essentially the bottom part was Princess Diana. Meanwhile, the top was Alien Queen. I really didn’t get the effect.
Especially when coupled with Eva’s hair, which featured an ENORMOUS crown thingy that looked like it belonged with a Frozen costume and frizzy hair underneath her veil. Also, super long pointy matte white nails like she painted them with White-Out. You know you did that in middle school too! Anyway, I felt like the whole look was stiff, overdone, and not particularly flattering. Very costume-like. Just me?