Whew – we have crossed the finish line with season 7 of Vanderpump Rules and I am here to report that this reunion did not need to be 3 parts. There – recap done!
OK, kidding. I actually felt there were some illuminating moments. Like the glimpse of Katie Maloney‘s hubris. Wowee-wow-WOW. Katie literally always sees herself as the victim. She blames James Kennedy for the internet hating her but the internet rightfully hated Katie long before her antics this season! As Tom 1 never really got a chance to say courtesy of James’ interrupitis – a germ passed from Kristen Doute – Katie has been a rancid bottle of ranch dressing since season 1. Katie’s OWN putrid behavior is the reason the Twitterverse rails on her – it has nothing to do with James or her weight (or her husband’s manhood – how is that not also body shaming?). Let’s just say Katie is giving marriage, ranch dressing, the internet, and humanity a bad name. Oh, and also clothing.
Some people may forget this, but Summer House is actually a Vanderpump Rules spin-off show. Who could ever forget Kyle Cooke telling Stassi Schroeder that she looks like Steve Jobs in the hot tub? It feels like a whole lifetime ago though.
During tonight’s Summer House episode, Stassi returns to Montauk. This time, she brings her boyfriend Beau Clark, Katie Maloney, and Tom Schwartz to the house.
Tonight is the finale segment of the Vanderpump Rules reunion and after James Kennedy fled the stage there’s nothing else for them to do but discuss all the boring stuff none of us care about.
I’m totally over this season (and this cast). Subsequently, I am thrilled that this is the final episode of a long (and largely pointless season). So, I say pull the curtain on this mess and flip the script.
I’m having a visceral reaction to part 2 of the Vanderpump Rules reunion. It’s like Lord Of The Flies. James Kennedy is the pig they’re chasing across the island of the doomed until somebody, (probably Tom 2 if we’re being honest) winds up dismembered. Remember when this show was so fun?!
What I’ve come to realize is that these people – chiefly Katie Maloney, Jax Taylor, and Kristen Doute – live in an echo chamber of their own delusions. They can’t learn from experiences because they’ve blocked all the dissenting voices. Instead, they are deafened by the vortex of praise they offer each other. James isn’t even allowed to speak without Kristen cutting him off and screaming him down with some accusation or insult. Andy Cohen wonders why James so angry. Lisa Vanderpump decides it’s because James had a drink at lunch. Or maybe it’s as James said: so many people yelling at him constantly that he can’t breathe.
Do you ever watch reality TV and feel like the cast members are friends in your head? How about the parents? Do you ever watch and wonder what it would be like to have them as a mom? Just me? Alright, then.
I cannot help being fascinated by the relationships between reality TV stars and their mothers. Not all moms are created equal and not everyone is meant to be a reality TV star. Some of them are just hilarious. They steal every scene and deserve to star in shows of their own. It gets to a point with some of these cast members that it seems like their moms are the reason they’re still on TV. I don’t want to call anyone out, but when your mom gets her own on-camera interviews on your show, she’s definitely stealing your shine. Whether she’s trying to or not.
Last night was the Met Gala and also someone was thrown out of a PTA meeting at my kids’ school when things erupted into a full-on screaming match. Fittingly, it was also part 1 of Vanderpump Rules reunion – so yeah, busy night!
Also as if trying to straddle two events, like she straddles two worlds on Vanderpump Rules, Raquel Leviss‘s reunion dress was the very definition of the Met Gala theme “Camp,” boasting uber-exaggerated shoulders accented by a full duvet of ruffles. It was like a super amped up version of an Alice In Wonderland dress. I loved it. It was almost a perfect representation for the ridiculousness of this show. Raquel came to make a statement that she is here to stay.
For a long time, Stassi Schroeder was the designated “villain” on Vanderpump Rules. Now, it’s pretty easy to justify that label for most of the cast members. Almost all of them have filled that role for an episode or two. Even so, it was easy to feel for Stassi during her mom Dayna Schroeder’s appearances earlier this season.
While fawning all over Stassi’s man Beau Clark, Dayna told her daughter, “I don’t want you to be yourself and mess it up.” That was very harsh. She also got wasted at Stassi’s birthday and used that as an excuse to talk about her daughter’s boyfriend’s penis. It was even more cringe-worthy than it sounds. So where does the mother/daughter duo stand today? Things are not great, which is (sadly) not-at-all surprising to any of the viewers.
The Vanderpump Rules reunion episodes are always a highlight for fans. The cast never disappoints when it comes to rehashing their old drama. And, creating new drama, of course. They all get dressed to the nines just to argue for hours on end.
I could never imagine getting all glammed up just to argue with my frienemies. Then again, they are getting paid to film a TV show. We have seen clips from the reunion and heard warnings about how awful it was from Jax Taylor. Before tonight’s episode airs, check out some pictures from the taping.