Lisa Vanderpump's Closet

Jax Taylor is no stranger to bizarre drama, but getting arrested for stealing designer sunglasses during the Vanderpump Rules cast’s trip to Hawaii has pushed Lisa Vandeprump over the edge!

Lisa is strangely tolerant towards Jax’s nonsense – I can only imagine she has Xanax stashed in her BumpIt! – but even Lisa can’t believe that he was this stupid.

Jax just had the vacation of his life, why does he have to go and screw it up in the last hour?” says a shocked Lisa. “He’s always pushing boundaries, and now it has kind of bitten him in the ass.” 

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Jax was lucky that his girlfriend Brittany Cartwright forgave him, and that his friends bailed him out! Regarding the arrest, claims he was drunk and had no idea what he was doing when he nabbed the glasses. Security footage doesn’t exactly support his recollection, but you be the judge

Lisa isn’t only questioning Jax’s choices, she’s also wondering what’s wrong with James Kennedy and Scheana Marie. Aren’t we all…  

Reacting to Lala Kents reveal that James couldn’t get it up one drunken night, Lisa is shocked. “I mean James is 23, how could that happen?” wonders Lisa. “I think in 33 years of marriage, I think I’ve seen that happen once. I mean, when Ken was 23 I’m sure he was trying to make it go down not come up.” Touche! 

As for Lala going topless and practically bottomless at the beach, Lisa snarks that Katie and Scheana are “bit jealous” because James and Lala are “kind of young and fun and fancy free.” 

Lisa also calls Scheana out on her shit-stirring, lying hypocrisy when she decided  to text Ariana’s mom a string of lies about Tom 1. Lisa is not a fan of Scheana’s justifications. 

Scheana says that her problems with Shay are none of Tom’s business, and yet she’s making Tom and Ariana’s relationship her business,” points out Lisa in her blog. “Scheana needs to understand that it’s about Tom and Ariana’s relationship working for them not for her.” 

Tonight the cast returns to LA, and Lisa lectures Jax on his latest bonehead move. She also deals with the return of Stassi Schroeder

Reality Tea will be live-tweeting!

TELL US – DO YOU AGREE WITH LISA’S OPINIONS ON JAX, JAMES, AND SCHEANA?

[Photo Credit: Bravo]

 

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