The waves came crashing down on Real Housewives Of New York. There were so many rules of engagement and disengagement, I’m not sure who broke what and if they used an icepick or a d-ck. Between Class With The Countess, How-Tos With Heather, and Bossing By Bethenny there was just a whole lotta lecturing going on. Ladies – just stop being so uncool and let Ramona Singer get her groove on.
Things resume at the F-U dinner, but the only thing they’re feasting on is each other and still fighting about whether or not an F-bomb is an acceptable way to pepper a conversation. Dorinda Medley starts sobbing. Heather Thomson rushes her to console her in the bathroom, but here comes Ramona, all gold lamé and I want it my way, wedging herself between Heather and Dorinda. Dorinda is RAMONA’s FRIEND – Hands OFF!
Meanwhile, Susan is meeting Andi Black for some shopping and defensive maneuvering. When asked about Jonathan’s thumb move, Susan laughs it off. “Jonathan is really comfortable with himself,” says Susan. Andi understands that Jonathan has some good qualities, but she doesn’t know whether to love or hate him at the moment. Well, I’ve got a suggestion: just go ahead and hate the misogynist S.O.B! He already hates all of womankind, so it’s allllllll good, ladies.
I knew it was too much to ask for another Abby Lee Miller bye-week on Dance Moms. It’s like my week is just full of Mondays! It’s deja vu as the episode begins with the moms yet again wondering if the ALDC leader will show her face this week. Kira announces that she’s enlisted Kalani’s hometown dance teacher Alexa to work on a solo for Kira at this week’s competition in Phoenix. Jill wonders if it’s such a good idea to defy the crazy lady to whom they subject their children, but Kira retorts that if Abby has a problem with her decision, perhaps she and her daughter will leave with her original instructor. Kira also shares the rumor that Jeanette has taken over Candy Apples with good ol’ Cathy. I am not sure I’m up for all of this drama (pours wine, shovels Trader Joe’s mac and cheese into mouth for a late dinner/really ate lunch…)!
Across town, Jeanette reveals that Cathy won’t be joining the Candy Apples in Los Angeles this week, but she’s gotten her blessing to lead the studio to victory. The Candy Apple moms must have gotten a Groupon on Botox. Jeanette cites their group number as an interpretation of people who get a taste of fame and go crazy. The ALDC girls notice that there is no pyramid set up this week, and Abby enters, totally ignoring all of the moms. Holly questions her intentions, and she coldly leads the girls in warm-up and mentions her attendance will be determined on a daily basis. Kira mentions her plans to have Kalani to work with her hometown instructor, and Abby says she’ll think about it…not.
Tamra is preparing to go to Northern California with her mom to witness her granddaughter’s birth. Sarah, Ryan’s wife, has a scheduled c-section and Tamra is bummed Ryan will be in the delivery room instead of the TAM-MA. After all WHO has more experience with babies?! #Astro.
The whole situation is a bit bittersweet, however, because Vicki is leaving for Chicago for her mother’s funeral and Tamra is sad she won’t be able to attend. Tamra deals with her grief by focusing on how she’ll be the hottest grandma in the OC and that her mom Sandra will be the hottest great-grandma. She instructs Sandra to get a full-body health scan and then have some sex for the other type of full-body scan, so she doesn’t die. Only Tamra would combine sex and death and grandmothers in a heart-to-heart. I’m not sure if that’s a compliment or not…
Well, I certainly didn’t see that coming! Not only did VH1 mess with my head with a Sunday premiere of this week’s Love & Hip Hop Atlanta (that I wasn’t able to watch until it’s regularly scheduled time!), but then they go and give Ashley Nicole a girlfriend, totally throwing Rasheeda for a loop. When we last left the crew, Rasheeda had enlisted Erica Dixon to accompany her to a hotel where she thought she’s catch husband Kirk Frost in the act with his new artist. Once they force their way into the hotel room, Rasheeda is searching closets and looking under beds (newsflash, Kirk’s forehead alone isn’t going to fit in any of those places!) as Ashley loudly protests. Next, Erica assesses the situation, and Rasheeda isn’t a good enough actress to feign shock at Ashley’s bed mate. Raheeda admits that she may have been wrong about Ashley’s sexual preference, but she’s not incorrect about Ashley’s disrespectful behavior.
It’s been a while since we’ve seen Bambi, but Lil’ Scrappy has been moved by Momma Dee’s romance with Ernest. Bambi has been patient with sporting her own promissory ring. He hands her a tiny box, and Bambi may faint if this is the proposal she’s been hoping for…but alas, Scrappy isn’t ready for that shiznighee called marriagenighzee. He gifts her with a key to his house, but Bambi wants to make sure he gets things squared away with Erica before she calls a moving truck. Erica has been against the couple since day one, and with all the messy child support claims Erica is lodging against Scrappy, Bambi doesn’t want to find herself caught up in the drama.
We can always count on the ladies of Real Housewives Of Atlanta to keep it 100! And to prove it they celebrated their 100th episode by spilling-all to Andy Cohen. “The Atlanta women are funny! We’re honest and real, and we never bite our tongues,” describes Kim Zolciak of the pride that comes with RHOA.
All of the Housewives – past and present – feel the success of the show and also its magic was that it showcased affluent African-American women. I have to ask, other than Kandi Burruss: Who are these affluent Housewives again? Certainly they’re not referring to SheBySheBroke?! (“A fashion show with no fashions?! How dreadful!”). And then they dish on bad hair (NeNe Leakes is voted the worst), bad fashions (no declarative winner) and worst fight (again, no declarative winner).
I was hoping Sheree and Lisa Wu-Hartwell would be appearing but they didn’t! My favorite part was seeing the ladies’ audition tapes – first of all how freaking different does NeNe look? But how freaking the same is her ego – large and in charge of everything!
VH1 has us pegged for sure. As the summer wears on and reruns abound, we can count on reality shows to provide us with some new material and much needed drama. Enter the ladies of Basketball Wives: LA. Who cares if you’re the wife of a basketball player? If you want to create tension with the series veterans, by all means, join in the shenanigans! Last night was the long awaited (by me, at least, but I know I can’t be the only one!) premiere of the latest season of BBW: LA, and it did not disappoint.
It’s been so long, I can’t keep up with which ladies hate the others, which ones threatened to never return but are still front and center, and why in the world Tami Roman decided to jump casts. I’m sure it won’t be too difficult to catch up to speed. The episode begins with Malaysia Pargo redecorating her home in the midst of her divorce from Jannero Pargo, and Brandi Maxiell stops in to check up on her friend. She’s ready to play matchmaker, but Malaysia wants some me time for a change. Malaysia explains that she couldn’t keep being disrespected by her husband, and he wasn’t willing to go to counsel. Brandi can relate, but she’s not willing to consider divorce…yet. Malaysia wants to change the subject, but she doesn’t want it re-routed to a conversation about Jackie Christie. She hasn’t forgiven Jackie for her behavior and insensitive comments last season, so it will be game on when the ladies are forced to interact.
It’s a great day at Jeff Lewis Design! We’re only on episode 2 and already have one flip out behind us, one new clueless intern ahead, and the rest of the Flipping Out gang (minus Andrew, of course) back in action.
This week, we begin at Gramercy where Jeff is hearing news from Gage Edwardabout a “Jefferson thing” sent via text to Intern Joe, who has no idea what that means. Neither does Jeff. But before Joe can blink, in walks Gage to snipe at him to “get clarification in person” next time he has a question – rather than pass on his weird text messages to Jeff sans interpretive call? Gage is stressed and Jeff is snippy. The addition of Joe as Gage’s “assistant” was supposed to help ease Gage’s stress, however Joe’s obvious inadequacy in sending mail and answering text messages is hurting rather than helping the already tense situation.