So what was going on last night, Bravo? A word of advice: If you can't air the storyline, then, you know don't air the story. But I suppose that would mean forgoing some major drama and they can't have that, can they?
Real Housewives of Beverly Hills has made a case for going where no show goes before into the gory, depraved, salacious, and libelous department. And last night was no exception.
Before we get to the good stuff let's discuss Splits Richards trying to show off that she's the new rich biatch in town. She's giving her 16-year-old, the one who couldn't parallel part last week, a brand new Mercedes coupe. That's the perfect first car to total, amirite! It's apparently because Mauricio is now raking in the dough big time with his new real estate agency.
Personally, I'm really over the daughter driving story. I mean who is she – a Kardashian? Furthermore, those shorts are too short for a 16-year-old. I guess she's also taking fashion advice from Aunt Paris.
I mean, I don't doubt that Andy Cohen and his minions select ladies who are going to bring the drama and then puts them in situations which are going to create it to the umpteenth degree. The ladies of Beverly Hills are no different. Taylor Armstrong alone brings enough dramatics for a Broadway production.
Anyhoo, Taylor is coming to the media interwebs with guns blazing. It's a brazen attempt to find some sort of fan base in her madness. I can't say I blame her. This is her bread and butter. Unfortunately, she underestimated her viewership…we don't like bread and butter…we like good cheese and fancy breads and wine not in a box. Or in a box, as long as you have some wonderful cheeses!
Last night on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills the ladies got wild and out in Ojai. I have to say last night was one of the most fun episodes ever and it makes you think if they all got their panties out of a wad, relaxed, and spoke to each other like normal people instead of obsessing over petty drama they'd all get along and be fun. But alas, that would be too easy and far too mature.
Things begin with the girls still in Ojai where Brandi Glanville has just dropped the eff-bomb at Buckingham Palace in front of Queen Elizabeth and her corgis. Oh, wait – no she didn't. She just said it to Adrienne Maloof, but the way these ninnies were acting you'd think this was the most official, classy, elegant prestigious dinner in all the world. I don't know why they were all getting up on their high horses acting like they've never said F-U before when we all know they use it. Right, Splits Richards?
Anyway, Brandi and Kim Richards were doing a big Ojai love-in and pouring their hearts out when Adrienne gets on the intercom with her whiny, donkey voice to announce that someone is crying in Aisle 5 and clean-up is required. Repeat, someone – ahem KIM – is crying!
So Brandi was forced to tell Adrienne to eff off and everyones' heads snapped around like Adrienne just announced that someone was peeing on a Chanel bag. Their mouths dropped, and they glared at Brandi as if she was pee culprit desecrating the holy statue.
I feel like there is a giant math equation regarding how much gossip we hear about the show in proportion to the ratio of time a housewives franchise has been on the air divided by the amount of certified crazies in the cast and then taken to the third power of the square root of how many on-air divorces occur multiplied by the number of husbands we think could potentially be cheating. It's like E=MC² up in here!
Given all of those mathematical conundrums, it only makes sense we'd be hearing a lot the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills at the moment. We've got the crazies, we've got the divorces, and I have some suspicions about some of those husbands! First up, we've got Brandi Glanville engaging in yet another Twitter war with home wrecker (don't sue me!) LeAnn Rimes and more news on the Adrienne Maloof front.
Our favorite reality TV stars can’t get enough of the spotlight during their regularly scheduled time slots, so they take to Twitter to share even more of their daily lives with us. And we love them for it! Here’s a roundup of some of our favorite photos from the Twitterverse this week! Enjoy!