Stassi Schroeder

Vanderpump Rules stars Kristen and Katie

Vanderpump Rules stars Kristen Doute and Katie Maloney and Saturday Night Live star (and Vanderpump Rules super fan) Bobby Moynihan were Andy Cohen‘s guests on Watch What Happens Live last night.

We learn that Bobby is a huge Lala Kent fan.

About the purple, all-lace dress Lala wears in her talking heads, Bobby says, “Dress is crazy. I just can’t understand how a human being can be so confident to just wear an outfit that’s just like, ‘Here’s what I got!’ I am a big Lala fan. I can’t find anything that Lala’s done wrong yet.” In response to a dirty look from Katie, he concedes, “I get it. I do not work with her; it is just a TV show to me.”

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Katie Maloney launches Pucker & Pout

Last night on Vanderpump Rules Katie Maloney launched her beauty blog Pucker & Pout. I’ll let “Katie Maloney + makeup and fashion tips” sink in a bit before moving on… But anyways, congratulations! 

Katie has been working hard to build her blog and decides to throw an industry launch party to debut it to the world, so she can begin making money. What Katie really wants, however, is an exclusive party with a tightly-controlled guest list, so she can wander around SUR pointing at people with her new Scheana Marie witch’s talon nails snapping, “Invited!” “Not Invited!” as she plucks the leaves, one by one, off Lisa Vanderpump‘s 100 year-old custom-cultivated tulips originally cuttings from Josephine Bonaparte’s garden, once watered with the blood of Napoleon (can you tell I’ve been watching War & Peace? It’s like Vanderpump Rules with more complicated names, more conniving, decent fitting clothing, more lying, and swords instead of cocktail stirrers). 

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Vanderpump Rules - Season 3

Katie Maloney is newly engaged, gainfully employed, and in a good place with her friends these days. All things ex-BFF and Vanderpump Rules star Stassi Schroeder is decidedly not! While THE RETURN OF STASSI! seems to be the Japanese horror film headline everywhere one turns on VPR these past weeks, Katie says she’s trying to focus on the more positive aspects of her life. She does admit that seeing her old friend squirm under the expert interrogation/verbal spanking Lisa Vanderpump doled out was a bit uncomfortable to watch this week. But she agreed with Lisa’s astute points, just the same!

Before Katie breaks down the Stassi Situation, she reflects on the “perfect” time she and the gang spent in Hawaii – that is, until Jax Taylor decided to play petty sunglasses thief. When she found out about Jax’s arrest, Katie admits, ” I had no words and still have a difficult time articulating how frustrating and disappointing that day was. We had all separated for mere hours and for something this catastrophic to have happened is purely mind numbing.”

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Stassi is sad

Last night’s episode of Vanderpump Rules confirmed what I have been saying for years (seasons in Reality TV time): Kristen Doute and Jax Taylor are soulmates. I fully anticipate that in a few years time they’ll drunkenly run off to Vegas for a midnight elopement, then have a combative, insane, marriage befitting of a Hunter S. Thompson tale. All’s Fair In Love And Liquor: A True Tale Of Krax. So thank you, Tom 2, for validating that. 

But no thank you, Tom 2, for the reference to your flaccid penis. Katie Maloney, please get off Scheana Marie‘s drama train and onto your man. If the way Tom 2 was making out with that Hooters chicken wing is any indication, that was a man deprived and we know how Katie feels about make-out cheating! 

The Kristen Doute Apology Tour continues on, gathering steam by adding Stassi Schroeder, and growing into a cloud of vicissitude by adding Jax

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Jax Taylor is arrested in Hawaii

Stassi Schroeder has returned and Jax Taylor got arrested. All in a days work for Vanderpump Rules, right? 

In Hawaii the group continues having a conniption fit over Lala Kent‘s existence. After Lala confronted Brittany Cartwright about Jax’s lying, and then confronted Jax about his lying, to which Jax lied about lying, Lala retreated to her hotel to cry into the complimentary towels. Reality TV is so hard! She just needs her mommy! But, as Lala pointed out, Faith also took off her top, but no one was yelling at her! Katie Maloney, a hypocrite? Nooooooo… 

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Stassi Schroeder

Vanderpump Rules villain Stassi Schroeder and Nashville’s Chris Carmack were Andy Cohen‘s guests on Watch What Happens Live last night. Stassi dished on her friendship with Kristen Doute, the status of her relationship with Patrick, and more. Jax Taylor released a statement about his arrest in Hawaii.

Stassi says that she and Kristen have been friends again for a while now. “It was a slow process. I didn’t speak to her for a year, then every month after that I felt like it was giving another inch and then eventually it just got back to the way it used to be,” explains Stassi. “I’m really happy about that. I love Kristen.”

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James Kennedy with new girlfriend Raquel

While the rest of the Vanderpump Rules cast is in Sundance celebrating Katie Maloney‘s 30th birthday (and instagramming the hell out of it), James Kennedy turned 24 with a new lady by his side! 

Recently James was showmancing dating Lala Kent, who never actually confirmed whether or not they are a couple (Kristen Doute claims they were using each other for the show), but have they officially split? 

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Gretchen Rossi at Sundance

The snow comes to some reality TV stars, and some reality TV stars go to the snow. On Friday, former Real Housewives of Orange County star Gretchen Rossi headed to Park City, Utah, for the Sundance Film Festival. She shared the pic above on Instagram,  captioning it,  “With my love yesterday in the snow. #Sundance2016 #whitewinterland #GetGlamwithGretchen #fauxfur”

Also in Park City over the weekend were Bachelorette star Kaitlyn Bristowe, former Real Housewives of New York star Jill Zarin, Vanderpump Rules stars Katie Maloney, Tom Schwartz, Kristen Doute, Tom Sandoval, Stassi Schroeder, Ariana Madix, and Jax Taylor, Kendra Wilkinson, and more.

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