Ready to speak her truth? Nearly a year after separating from ex-husband Tom Schwartz, Katie Maloney is opening up about the split, including the revelation that convinced her to finally pull the plug.
The long-time Vanderpump Rules couple maintained a respectful and united front in the midst of their split, and kept public comments to a dignified minimum. Neither offered details of their divorce. Only after Tom hooked up with co-star Raquel Leviss did that veneer crack.
And now, Katie is ready to share a bit more about the demise of a relationship that spanned the entire course of Pump Rules. According to RealityBlurb!, during an appearance on The Viall Files, hosted by The Bachelor alum Nick Viall, Katie shared her feelings. “There was kinda a moment where I did kinda wake up and things started coming into view,” she stated.
Katie recalled finally accepting her intuition that the relationship was over. “It’s like this voice inside me woke up and said, ‘You don’t want this, and you need to be honest with yourself that these are probably things that are going to be present forever. Is this the kind of person you want to be with, or do you deserve more?’ [And] it just got louder,” the Something About Her co-owner said. “I wasn’t happy, and I hadn’t prioritized myself because I was prioritizing someone else… at the expense of myself and my happiness.”
The mix of emotions that followed were very complex, and Katie is still coming to terms with them two months after finalizing the divorce. She explained, “Once I was honest with myself, and I was like, ‘No, I don’t want this,’ I felt relief, and that was hard and sad for me. It was pain and sadness and relief,” she explained. “It was a lot all at once.”
So why did Katie file for divorce? She cited Tom’s refusal “to prioritize me.” VPR viewers will not be surprised by this admission. Tom’s friendship with his Schwartz & Sandy’s co-owner Tom Sandoval regularly overshadowed the marriage. Frankly, Tom shined in the presence of his quirky friend and Katie often seemed unheard.
Katie said, “I felt like I came dead last to everyone else in the room, his friends and strangers, and he’s such a charismatic, charming guy. Everyone loves him, but when it came to me, I didn’t feel I was seen or heard or supported on an emotional level or intellectual level. I felt very alone a lot of the time,” she added.
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Tom disagreed with “a lot of” Katie’s perceptions. He accepted the decision at the time, but did not take it “well.”
But Katie defended her position, saying there were long-term problems. She said, “These were things that over the years I’d been frustrated by, and when we tried to work through it, I feel I was stonewalled a bit, and I tried to justify.. and then I got to the point where I’m just like, ‘I don’t think this is ever gonna change. I don’t think he’s ever gonna change.'”
Post-separation, the two lived together in the house that they shared. Katie credits that arrangement for allowing them to transition and de-escalate their feelings.
“When we separated, we were still living together for five months, and it was kinda nice to have that time because we were able to sort of untangle, uncouple during that time and get used to not being together even though we were together,” Katie stated.
Tom and Katie’s “main contact” these days is co-parenting their two dogs. Their relationship did take a hit when Tom allegedly hooked up with Raquel at Brock Davies and Scheana Shay’s wedding.
Katie took the news hard. She shared, “I’m trying [to remain friendly], but I just feel like there’s been a lot of disrespect.” When asked if that “disrespect” applied to the hookup, Katie replied, “Yeah, obviously. But there’s so much more to that.”
TELL US- WHAT IS YOUR REACTION TO KATIE’S COMMENTS? DID TOM NOT PRIORITIZE HER? HOW WOULD YOU REACT TO TOM AND RAQUEL’S HOOKUP IF YOU WERE KATIE?
[Photo Credit: Charles Sykes/Bravo/NBCU Photo Bank]
