Everybody gather ’round and play your tiny violins for Kristen Doute. Poor Kristen is having a heck of a time, thus far on Vanderpump Rules. She has no man, no friends, and still no point on the show. Even though Kristen no longer claims Brian Carter as a dependant on her taxes, her completely dysfunctional relationships with her best friends began circling the drain
Stassi Schroeder and Katie Maloney, both successful relationship experts, grew weary of Kristen’s constant complaining about her life. Seemingly forgetting the only storylines either of them have had for the past two seasons revolved around their basic inability to function with a significant other. Now Stassi finds herself planning a wedding and fans are wondering if she will invite old buddy Kristen, despite their on/off status. Will Drunk Kristen have a seat at the A table, or will she be relegated to the parking lot, singing Good As Gold and crying with Scheana Marie?
Kristen cannot catch a break, you guys. She’s damned if she does and damned if she doesn’t, as decreed by the two most powerful members of the Witches of WeHo coven. It’s literally a coven no other person wants to be in, but a coven nonetheless. Right now we aren’t focusing on Kristen’s lack of a life. Or a man. Or any friends. The hot topic is whether or not Kristen will score a ticket to Stassi’s upcoming nuptials.
Stassi spoke with Us Weekly and updated everyone on whether or not Kristen’s invitation will get “lost in the mail”. Stassi admits they are trying to navigate their way around being civil in public, but that doesn’t mean ‘ol Doute will be toasting the newlyweds. “I’m not going to invite someone [to my wedding] that I’m not even really speaking to or hanging out with. But I’m not not inviting her,” Stassi shared. Well now Kristen no longer needs to wonder, amirite? But hey, it’s Stassi’s day, she can invite whomever she wants.
RELATED: Jax Taylor Explains Why He Thinks Stassi Schroeder & Katie Maloney Won’t Make Up With Kristen Doute; Brittany Cartwright Disagrees
While Stassi says she and Kristen no longer roll in the same circles (Stassi doesn’t hang out with single people, she would never), she did see her old buddy at a Super Bowl party. She said, “It’s fine. I say, ‘Hello, how are you? What’s going on?’ She [Kristen] does the same. But it’s not like we’re hanging out.”
But look, don’t cry for Kristen just yet. The road to redemption might open up for her if she can do some fancy
ass-kissing talking at the reunion for this season. Stassi explained, “It’s weird to say, but when the reunion rolls around, it’s like our time to really hash things out. Of course I would want Kristen [at our wedding]. But I think we need to get to a point where it would be normal for her to be there.” I guess in a worst-case scenario, Kristen and Scheana can chill at Tom Tom and talk about the men who have wronged them. That would be one hell of a bender.
RELATED: Scheana Marie Doesn’t Think Stassi Schroeder & Katie Maloney “Showed Up As A Friend” For Kristen Doute
As for Kristen, she’s still hanging in there – because what else does she do? Kristen said, “I know what a great friend I’ve always been to them [Stassi and Katie].” Except for that one time you banged Stassi’s boyfriend. I’m sorry, two times you banged Stassi’s boyfriend. “I know that I’m kind and that I’m loyal and I’ve always been there for them and if that’s not something they want in their lives, there are a lot of other people that I can give that love to.” Kind and loyal? Are we talking about Giggy or Kristen?
It remains to be seen if Kristen will be granted a coveted spot at Stassi and Beau Clark’s wedding. I mean, she did introduce the couple to each other. But maybe it’s time for Kristen to “give that love” to friends outside the circle of incest that is Pump Rules. Nah, it’s Kristen, she’ll probably crash the reception.
RELATED: Ariana Madix Says Tom Sandoval Was “So In The Wrong” For Text He Sent Stassi Schroeder; Insists There’s No Jealousy
TELL US- DO YOU THINK STASSI AND KRISTEN WILL MAKE UP? WILL KRISTEN BE AT STASSI’S WEDDING? DO YOU FEEL SORRY FOR KRISTEN?
[Photo Credit: Bravo]